Flat following relationship break up
Flat following relationship break up
Author
Discussion

LosingGrip

Original Poster:

8,685 posts

183 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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I'll try and keep it brief. It's very fresh (as in today). We are no married and have zero kids. Deposit was 50/50 each. Mortgage is £530ish. I pay £650 a month and she pays around £520 a month due to me earning more. This covers the bills. I also pay the yearly maintenance fees and she pays the lease (£770 a year for me, around £160 for her).

What options are available? I can't afford to buy her out currently (she couldn't afford to buy me out). I'd like to think we'd be sensible and grown up about things but aware that may change in the future.

I can afford the mortgage and bills by myself (I'd have to make cut backs though and do a couple of overtime shifts a month). Maybe sell the motorbike. I don't believe that she'll be able to afford the mortgage and bills by herself.

Options that I'm running through my head.

1). We both continue to pay the same but take turns in living at the flat (her being here during the week as shes closer to work and me at the weekends when I'm not working). Gives us a chance to save up to buy someone out.

2). Can I take over the mortgage payments and get her taken off but she keeps a share of what she's paid into the flat already? So when I can buy her out I can?

3). We sell. Easiest option that I know of (I don't know about the other two really). Mortgage is paid off and we split the rest 50/50. Downside is I no longer have a flat. I'd rather not do this but if I have to I will consider it.

Are there any other options? I'll obviously get professional advice in the future but just thinking things.

Please can my posts not be quoted just in case I need to delete (I will try not to as its bloody annoying!).

Edited by LosingGrip on Friday 25th November 20:47

Simpo Two

91,622 posts

289 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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Impressive thinking for day zero. Most people would be on their fifth beer by now, not doing maths...

I presume you both have somewhere else to live, is that right?

LosingGrip

Original Poster:

8,685 posts

183 months

Friday 25th November 2022
quotequote all
Ha! I rarely drink. It's been coming for a while as well.

We do. Both could go back to our parents. It would be easier for me to (I currently live an hour away from work, parents live two miles from work). She lives around 40 minutes from work and her parents are about an hour away. Which is why I'd be happy to stay at parents in the meantime during the week. I'd save a fortune on fuel as well as I could walk! Would make the mortgage payments a non issue completely ha.

Audemars

507 posts

122 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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If you can't buy her out or let her buy you out, then sell.

It will be too complicated otherwise.



grumbledoak

32,415 posts

257 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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Just sell. The alternatives to a clean split are so much worse.

Motorman74

485 posts

45 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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1 - is a ridiculous option - you've broken up with the woman, why would you want to have that hassle in your life, and why would she?

2 - Surely you need to get a fresh mortgage for the value of the flat with your half of any equity as a deposit and repay her the half of the equity that she has - why would she accept anything less?

3- Sounds the least hassle unless you are particularly attached to the property - although selling now may not be as easy as you think...

LosingGrip

Original Poster:

8,685 posts

183 months

Friday 25th November 2022
quotequote all
Audemars said:
If you can't buy her out or let her buy you out, then sell.

It will be too complicated otherwise.
How would it work buying her out. Would it just be what she's paid in so far or would it need to take into account the increase in value (125k up to around 150k-160k). Or would it be what she is happy with?

Vasco

18,009 posts

129 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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What does she want ?

It's often best to go along with the female if at all possible (or they become a nightmare...!!)

Defcon5

6,461 posts

215 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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LosingGrip said:
How would it work buying her out. Would it just be what she's paid in so far or would it need to take into account the increase in value (125k up to around 150k-160k). Or would it be what she is happy with?
You would need to work out what % of the flat is hers, get it valued and pay her that % of its current value.

You need to sell it and move back to your parents - undoubtedly the best option here especially as is an hour closer to the nick

LosingGrip

Original Poster:

8,685 posts

183 months

Friday 25th November 2022
quotequote all
grumbledoak said:
Just sell. The alternatives to a clean split are so much worse.
I think I would struggle to get back on the ladder (which I know isn't a major thing in the grand scheme of things but my mortgage is less than I could rent something of the same size for).

Motorman74 said:
1 - is a ridiculous option - you've broken up with the woman, why would you want to have that hassle in your life, and why would she?

2 - Surely you need to get a fresh mortgage for the value of the flat with your half of any equity as a deposit and repay her the half of the equity that she has - why would she accept anything less?

3- Sounds the least hassle unless you are particularly attached to the property - although selling now may not be as easy as you think...
As I've said its day one so not really sure what to think. Option one was more a short term thing I guess. Long term wouldn't be a good thing at all!

2 - That makes sense.

3 - I'm not attached to it in the slightest. But as above, I would like to stay on the property ladder but will sell if I need to.

Vasco said:
What does she want ?

It's often best to go along with the female if at all possible (or they become a nightmare...!!)
She wants us to stay together. I wont be doing this!

Austin_Metro

1,421 posts

72 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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There are a few more things I’d be thinking about:

1. When does that mortgage deal run out;

2. Would you have to pay a penalty to terminate it early;

3. What rate would you get now?

4. Be careful on valuation if doing a deal with her. My mortgage company knocked 10% off the valuation, as compared to what I thought was a conservative valuation from 2 years ago.

Be prepared to move home to the parents and invest the money saved on mortgage and travel in your new deposit fund.

I know there’s no answer in here … but I think sell and buy again in 12 months nearer work.

Vasco

18,009 posts

129 months

Friday 25th November 2022
quotequote all
Vasco said:
What does she want ?

It's often best to go along with the female if at all possible (or they become a nightmare...!!)
She wants us to stay together. I wont be doing this!
.
......oh dear.

I fear you'll end up with more hassle than you may be expecting.

Edited by Vasco on Friday 25th November 21:57

eliot

11,989 posts

278 months

Friday 25th November 2022
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If you did option 1 and her new boyfriend is rooting her all week in ‘your’ flat how would you feel?

LosingGrip

Original Poster:

8,685 posts

183 months

Friday 25th November 2022
quotequote all
Austin_Metro said:
There are a few more things I’d be thinking about:

1. When does that mortgage deal run out;

2. Would you have to pay a penalty to terminate it early;

3. What rate would you get now?

4. Be careful on valuation if doing a deal with her. My mortgage company knocked 10% off the valuation, as compared to what I thought was a conservative valuation from 2 years ago.

Be prepared to move home to the parents and invest the money saved on mortgage and travel in your new deposit fund.

I know there’s no answer in here … but I think sell and buy again in 12 months nearer work.
1 - One year 11 months.

2. Yeah, not sure what the penalty would be. I think 2%, maybe 3% (£2,000/£3,000 if my maths is right).

3. Not as good as what I'm getting now.

4. That is from Zoopla etc. I'd get a few estate agents in to have provide a better guide.

Parents isn't a bad shout, its not idea as who wants to move back home in their 30s. Only downside to moving closer to work is the price of properties. My sister has just paid £250k for a two bed flat in a new estate in a block of 16. I've got a garage and only downstairs in the block and paid half the price. But that's something to think about later.

OutInTheShed

13,378 posts

50 months

Saturday 26th November 2022
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LosingGrip said:
.....

2). Can I take over the mortgage payments and get her taken off but she keeps a share of what she's paid into the flat already? So when I can buy her out I can?
.....]
It's not a question of what she's paid in, it's a question of what her share of the equity is.

So, if you are 50/50, then her equity is half of (value - mortgage). Or maybe half of (value - mortgage - cost of selling) or maybe somewhere between.
So, if you buy her out, you put her in a similar position to if you sold and split the 'profit'.

Not sure how stamp duty will work if you buy her half.

A mate of mine's son went through this last year, and the outcome is that my mate now owns some fraction of his son's house.
The son could not sensibly raise enough mortgage on his own.

I'd suggest talking to a mortgage broker.

LosingGrip

Original Poster:

8,685 posts

183 months

Saturday 26th November 2022
quotequote all
Thats what I thought from a bit of reading last night/this morning. I've emailed our mortgage broker this morning to get some advice and see what is possible.

Mr_Megalomaniac

1,187 posts

90 months

Saturday 26th November 2022
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I think either options 3 or 1 - in that order.

LosingGrip

Original Poster:

8,685 posts

183 months

Saturday 26th November 2022
quotequote all
Bit of an update…

Family have said they’ll help if I want to buy her out. I’ll speak to who I need to on Monday and go from there.

pork911

7,365 posts

207 months

Saturday 26th November 2022
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Sell, or if you especially want to keep it buy her out.

Either way, unless compelling reasons I'd personally value your shares in the property as equal 50/50.

LosingGrip

Original Poster:

8,685 posts

183 months

Monday 28th November 2022
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It will be 50/50. Yes I pay more each month by £100 but I earn £10,000 a year more and also wanted Sky Sports and a few others.

Had a chat with the mortgage bloke today. He seems to think on my salary I can get a mortgage for around £135,000. This will cover the £110,000 we have left to pay plus her half of the equity depending on what it’s valued at.

Got to phone the company over the next couple of days to see if they’ll lend me enough.