Do I live next door to chavs?
Discussion
Rhetorical question I think but, clues as to why :
Empty Bins sit outside on pavement for days after the bin men have been. Every week.
There's a single mattress in the driveway.
Music can only be played if the windows are open for all to hear. Increase volume at random interval/as you spot someone next door go outside
Arm sleeve tattoos
Never park on the driveway
Have in excess of 4 children (bit harsh I guess)
Weird child that seems to communicate via high pitched screaming at all times if outside. Especially so if on trampoline.
Trampoline in back garden.
Dog that Ive never yet seen being taken for a walk
I'm happy with my little bungalow, been there 10 years now and I'm nearing retirement, but I'm so fed up with the c***s I'm yet again looking into moving (4th time) in my 30 year quest for peace and quiet somewhere.
Anybody else live next door to some?
Grump over!
Empty Bins sit outside on pavement for days after the bin men have been. Every week.
There's a single mattress in the driveway.
Music can only be played if the windows are open for all to hear. Increase volume at random interval/as you spot someone next door go outside
Arm sleeve tattoos
Never park on the driveway
Have in excess of 4 children (bit harsh I guess)
Weird child that seems to communicate via high pitched screaming at all times if outside. Especially so if on trampoline.
Trampoline in back garden.
Dog that Ive never yet seen being taken for a walk
I'm happy with my little bungalow, been there 10 years now and I'm nearing retirement, but I'm so fed up with the c***s I'm yet again looking into moving (4th time) in my 30 year quest for peace and quiet somewhere.
Anybody else live next door to some?
Grump over!
Empty Bins sit outside on pavement for days after the bin men have been. Every week. - yes Chav
There's a single mattress in the driveway. - yes Chav
Music can only be played if the windows are open for all to hear. Increase volume at random interval/as you spot someone next door go outside - Yes Chav
Arm sleeve tattoos - Some say yes, I say no.
Never park on the driveway - Why not? Mattress in the way? Then yes, Chav.
Have in excess of 4 children (bit harsh I guess) - Nope. Not if they are provided for.
Weird child that seems to communicate via high pitched screaming at all times if outside. Especially so if on trampoline. - Meh, kids scream.
Trampoline in back garden. - Probably chav.
Dog that Ive never yet seen being taken for a walk - yes Chav, assuming it's a "look at me" breed.
king castle in the garden - which beats any trampoline).
There's a single mattress in the driveway. - yes Chav
Music can only be played if the windows are open for all to hear. Increase volume at random interval/as you spot someone next door go outside - Yes Chav
Arm sleeve tattoos - Some say yes, I say no.
Never park on the driveway - Why not? Mattress in the way? Then yes, Chav.
Have in excess of 4 children (bit harsh I guess) - Nope. Not if they are provided for.
Weird child that seems to communicate via high pitched screaming at all times if outside. Especially so if on trampoline. - Meh, kids scream.
Trampoline in back garden. - Probably chav.
Dog that Ive never yet seen being taken for a walk - yes Chav, assuming it's a "look at me" breed.
CopperBolt said:
Anybody else live next door to some?
No, everyone near me is retired. I'm the chavviest person on my street (sleeve tattoo, 4 loud kids, personal plate on the car, and a bouncy fking castle in the garden - which beats any trampoline). Sounds depressingly familiar...
However, I'd raise you Christmas lights along the guttering, upstairs and down, still there from Christmas, probably will be until next Christmas.
Also, bottom of the range 1 series BMW with private plate to hide how old it is
Bailiffs clamping said 1 Series BMW
"lady" of the house seemingly unable to find skirts that actually cover her arse cheeks
However, I'd raise you Christmas lights along the guttering, upstairs and down, still there from Christmas, probably will be until next Christmas.
Also, bottom of the range 1 series BMW with private plate to hide how old it is
Bailiffs clamping said 1 Series BMW
"lady" of the house seemingly unable to find skirts that actually cover her arse cheeks
otolith said:
Having looked on Google Maps satellite view, I think someone ought to tell all the nice middle class people living in upmarket areas that the terrible chav shame of their secret trampolines is visible from space.
I wish I knew when the Google satellites were going over. I'd lay out a blue tarp in the garden so it looked like we had a pool. steveo3002 said:
its like a council house starter kit isnt it ? here we go sir, heres they keys to your new home , where shall we put the mattress and Olympic size trampoline ?
cant pay rent or feed the kids , yet ALWAYS ALWAYS money for the trampoline and sky tv
I dont think they're *actually* council. When I was moving in, 10 years or so ago, a 50 odd year old couple lived in there. and an 80yo lady the other side. So I thought, great, ideal.cant pay rent or feed the kids , yet ALWAYS ALWAYS money for the trampoline and sky tv
Literally the day I moved in the lady from the couple side came round and said, just to let you know, we're moving and renting the place out now.
FML.
And then the chavs moved in and been annoying from day 1.
I think as the all female offspring get older its going to get worse and worse so maybe best to cut my losses and FO. Either that or take off and nuke the entire site from orbit just to be sure.
They could be a lot worse I guess and its my intolerance for noise of any sort from any other source than me that doesnt help. I dread to say it in case I jinx but at least its quiet at night. And when its too cold to open windows/doors.
Edited by CopperBolt on Monday 20th February 14:30
SteveStrange said:
otolith said:
Having looked on Google Maps satellite view, I think someone ought to tell all the nice middle class people living in upmarket areas that the terrible chav shame of their secret trampolines is visible from space.
I wish I knew when the Google satellites were going over. I'd lay out a blue tarp in the garden so it looked like we had a pool. CopperBolt said:
Rhetorical question I think but, clues as to why :
Empty Bins sit outside on pavement for days after the bin men have been. Every week.
There's a single mattress in the driveway.
Music can only be played if the windows are open for all to hear. Increase volume at random interval/as you spot someone next door go outside
Arm sleeve tattoos
Never park on the driveway
Have in excess of 4 children (bit harsh I guess)
Weird child that seems to communicate via high pitched screaming at all times if outside. Especially so if on trampoline.
Trampoline in back garden.
Dog that Ive never yet seen being taken for a walk
I'm happy with my little bungalow, been there 10 years now and I'm nearing retirement, but I'm so fed up with the c***s I'm yet again looking into moving (4th time) in my 30 year quest for peace and quiet somewhere.
Anybody else live next door to some?
Grump over!
I live in a very friendly, quiet, small village full of retired house owners and it has been that way for many years.Empty Bins sit outside on pavement for days after the bin men have been. Every week.
There's a single mattress in the driveway.
Music can only be played if the windows are open for all to hear. Increase volume at random interval/as you spot someone next door go outside
Arm sleeve tattoos
Never park on the driveway
Have in excess of 4 children (bit harsh I guess)
Weird child that seems to communicate via high pitched screaming at all times if outside. Especially so if on trampoline.
Trampoline in back garden.
Dog that Ive never yet seen being taken for a walk
I'm happy with my little bungalow, been there 10 years now and I'm nearing retirement, but I'm so fed up with the c***s I'm yet again looking into moving (4th time) in my 30 year quest for peace and quiet somewhere.
Anybody else live next door to some?
Grump over!
There is one small Close of about 15 Housing Association houses the other side of the village from me that is exactly as you describe.
The only thing you have missed is the untaxed car with an expired MOT that is still used daily by the single mother of 8 children, and the front garden with indoor chairs and table that sit outside all year round along with all the children's toys for all to see, and the litter all round the Close.
If you can survive a few more summers the trampoline will be forgotten soon enough.
The females will start going out more. They seem to like hanging out in packs in the local shopping area.
With 4 kids in the house already its usually a good sign that it wont ve the party house for the neighbour hood for the teenagers.
The females will start going out more. They seem to like hanging out in packs in the local shopping area.
With 4 kids in the house already its usually a good sign that it wont ve the party house for the neighbour hood for the teenagers.
sherman said:
If you can survive a few more summers the trampoline will be forgotten soon enough.
The females will start going out more. They seem to like hanging out in packs in the local shopping area.
With 4 kids in the house already its usually a good sign that it wont ve the party house for the neighbour hood for the teenagers.
once the kids get a bit older you will have chav boyfriend /local weed dealer loitering around at all hrs The females will start going out more. They seem to like hanging out in packs in the local shopping area.
With 4 kids in the house already its usually a good sign that it wont ve the party house for the neighbour hood for the teenagers.
they will need to get on the breeding bandwagon to secure their new home for when they turn 15
Edited by steveo3002 on Monday 20th February 14:45
sherman said:
If you can survive a few more summers the trampoline will be forgotten soon enough.
The females will start going out more. They seem to like hanging out in packs in the local shopping area.
With 4 kids in the house already its usually a good sign that it wont be the party house for the neighbour hood for the teenagers.
Some good news at least!The females will start going out more. They seem to like hanging out in packs in the local shopping area.
With 4 kids in the house already its usually a good sign that it wont be the party house for the neighbour hood for the teenagers.
Id move mate, the offspring will soon attract any local scummers, then its loud music and noisy crap cars. I feel lucky on my road, only have to deal with poor parking opposite my drive from elderly neighbours guests, but then I am top chav 
plus when the in-laws come over to visit they tie the horse and cart to the lamppost
plus when the in-laws come over to visit they tie the horse and cart to the lamppost Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff