Random thought about colleagues and friends relationships
Discussion
Met up with some mates recently and the topic of relationships was bought up. We were all in agreement that all the men we knew were married with kids, or in long-term relationships. However, this was not the same with the female siblings, colleagues and friends that we knew. I thought it was just my experience, but it seems my mates also had similar experiences. So PH, are most of your male friends in relationships and most of your female friends single?
In my 50's along with many friends.
So many are becoming single after long term marriages became stale, and kids flown the nest.
Reasons?
I think we become less tolerant in middle age?
Maybe people feel they should be enjoying life again after being married for so long?
So many of the ladies I've spoken to have endured abusive relationships/marriages. I really didn't know it was that common.
So many are becoming single after long term marriages became stale, and kids flown the nest.
Reasons?
I think we become less tolerant in middle age?
Maybe people feel they should be enjoying life again after being married for so long?
So many of the ladies I've spoken to have endured abusive relationships/marriages. I really didn't know it was that common.
At first I thought about age groups but then I suspected there wouldn't be much difference between males and females until old age.
Then I thought perhaps females may be more comfortable about being openly single and just mingle more in society where as single men may be more reclusive and just hide away from society giving the appearance there were more single females than males.
Then I thought perhaps females may be more comfortable about being openly single and just mingle more in society where as single men may be more reclusive and just hide away from society giving the appearance there were more single females than males.
ThunderSpook said:
It’s an inverse relationship. Essentially it depends on your current relationship status.
If you’re currently in a relationship then every woman around you will be single, whereas if you’re single then every woman you know is taken.
Haha. Spot on. Years ago when I was single - nothing. As soon as I got together with my girlfriend, now wife, I was almost beating them off with a stick. It's like they see a relationship as a challenge. If you’re currently in a relationship then every woman around you will be single, whereas if you’re single then every woman you know is taken.
ThunderSpook said:
It’s an inverse relationship. Essentially it depends on your current relationship status.
If you’re currently in a relationship then every woman around you will be single, whereas if you’re single then every woman you know is taken.
So true.If you’re currently in a relationship then every woman around you will be single, whereas if you’re single then every woman you know is taken.
In addition I had so many chances to be naughty when I was married (I didn't though) and now I have been single for a very long time those chances ain't happening.
Maybe it's because when in a relationship you are more confident but when not, you look desperate
Out of all my partners friends, I would say 60/70% of them are single, these are women in the 33 to 40 year age. Most of them have been single for many years and appear to be quite happy to be single. The rest seem to want to be in a relationship, or at least they like the idea of being in a relationship. They put little effort into meeting anyone, but at the same time have impossibly high standards.
I just find it staggering that they haven't met a single person in the last 20 years that thought was suitable, yet expect the perfect man to turn up and want to have children with them in the last couple of years before they hit 40.
I just find it staggering that they haven't met a single person in the last 20 years that thought was suitable, yet expect the perfect man to turn up and want to have children with them in the last couple of years before they hit 40.
I spent an awfully long time looking for a relationship, had a few, they never worked, went back to it, never worked.
it took me a long time to realise it was all me, I was never blaming anyone for failed relationships, but you always hoped someone would get you.
Took me until my late 40's to realise that some people cannot be "got" They carve their own way and that way is never going to fit with 99.9% of womens idea of a life together.
It is annoying it took this long to find this out, I spent a long time being upset about failed relationships and being dumped for not much a reason.
But once you realise this fact, the world becomes clearer and you have a very cynical look to most relationships you see, I do not know anyone that is really happy in their relationship, they just are able to tolerate each other which to me seems pointless. Hence why I could never settle or please another enough for them to stick around. Some people are suited to this and find solace in the little moments.
I cannot do that, and I find it amazing that people can, that is it pure and simple.
it took me a long time to realise it was all me, I was never blaming anyone for failed relationships, but you always hoped someone would get you.
Took me until my late 40's to realise that some people cannot be "got" They carve their own way and that way is never going to fit with 99.9% of womens idea of a life together.
It is annoying it took this long to find this out, I spent a long time being upset about failed relationships and being dumped for not much a reason.
But once you realise this fact, the world becomes clearer and you have a very cynical look to most relationships you see, I do not know anyone that is really happy in their relationship, they just are able to tolerate each other which to me seems pointless. Hence why I could never settle or please another enough for them to stick around. Some people are suited to this and find solace in the little moments.
I cannot do that, and I find it amazing that people can, that is it pure and simple.
LukeBrown66 said:
I spent an awfully long time looking for a relationship, had a few, they never worked, went back to it, never worked.
it took me a long time to realise it was all me, I was never blaming anyone for failed relationships, but you always hoped someone would get you.
Took me until my late 40's to realise that some people cannot be "got" They carve their own way and that way is never going to fit with 99.9% of womens idea of a life together.
It is annoying it took this long to find this out, I spent a long time being upset about failed relationships and being dumped for not much a reason.
But once you realise this fact, the world becomes clearer and you have a very cynical look to most relationships you see, I do not know anyone that is really happy in their relationship, they just are able to tolerate each other which to me seems pointless. Hence why I could never settle or please another enough for them to stick around. Some people are suited to this and find solace in the little moments.
I cannot do that, and I find it amazing that people can, that is it pure and simple.
Anyone want to take this? it took me a long time to realise it was all me, I was never blaming anyone for failed relationships, but you always hoped someone would get you.
Took me until my late 40's to realise that some people cannot be "got" They carve their own way and that way is never going to fit with 99.9% of womens idea of a life together.
It is annoying it took this long to find this out, I spent a long time being upset about failed relationships and being dumped for not much a reason.
But once you realise this fact, the world becomes clearer and you have a very cynical look to most relationships you see, I do not know anyone that is really happy in their relationship, they just are able to tolerate each other which to me seems pointless. Hence why I could never settle or please another enough for them to stick around. Some people are suited to this and find solace in the little moments.
I cannot do that, and I find it amazing that people can, that is it pure and simple.
LukeBrown66 said:
I spent an awfully long time looking for a relationship, had a few, they never worked, went back to it, never worked.
it took me a long time to realise it was all me, I was never blaming anyone for failed relationships, but you always hoped someone would get you.
Took me until my late 40's to realise that some people cannot be "got" They carve their own way and that way is never going to fit with 99.9% of womens idea of a life together.
It is annoying it took this long to find this out, I spent a long time being upset about failed relationships and being dumped for not much a reason.
But once you realise this fact, the world becomes clearer and you have a very cynical look to most relationships you see, I do not know anyone that is really happy in their relationship, they just are able to tolerate each other which to me seems pointless. Hence why I could never settle or please another enough for them to stick around. Some people are suited to this and find solace in the little moments.
I cannot do that, and I find it amazing that people can, that is it pure and simple.
Nopeit took me a long time to realise it was all me, I was never blaming anyone for failed relationships, but you always hoped someone would get you.
Took me until my late 40's to realise that some people cannot be "got" They carve their own way and that way is never going to fit with 99.9% of womens idea of a life together.
It is annoying it took this long to find this out, I spent a long time being upset about failed relationships and being dumped for not much a reason.
But once you realise this fact, the world becomes clearer and you have a very cynical look to most relationships you see, I do not know anyone that is really happy in their relationship, they just are able to tolerate each other which to me seems pointless. Hence why I could never settle or please another enough for them to stick around. Some people are suited to this and find solace in the little moments.
I cannot do that, and I find it amazing that people can, that is it pure and simple.
SaulGoodman said:
Haha. Spot on. Years ago when I was single - nothing. As soon as I got together with my girlfriend, now wife, I was almost beating them off with a stick. It's like they see a relationship as a challenge.
Given it a few years and you'll be beating yourself off... Stick optional 
Terminator X said:
Female friends? I'm married so this is not a phrase that means anything to me.
I was thinking the same.My sister-in-law was widowed a few years ago. They had a quite a wide circle of friends but they were mainly through her late husband. She said she got "warned off" to varying degrees by several of the wives, and she's not in any way a flirty, 'touchy-feely' type of person.
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