Neighbours shouting at our dog in our garden
Discussion
We live next door to some sheltered housing type flats for elderly residents.
About 2 years ago we got a dog, obviously she is allowed in the back garden to runs around, play and "relieve" herself. Being a dog, she does occasionally bark. We have a public footpath that runs along the back of the garden so she will hear other dogs, foxes, kids shouting on the footpath and bark to defend her territory. She is out with a dog walker every week day for about 6 hours so is probably in the garden for no more than 30 minutes in total during the day, never before 7.30am and never after 10pm (usually 9.30pm). Left alone she probably barks for a total of less than 5 minutes a day.
When we first got her one of the residents from the flats next door decided to start shouting out his window everytime she barked. He would shout "shut up" and make various threats about throwing poison, reporting to the council etc etc. Unfortunately his shouting just made the dog bark more as she was now "talking" to someone. This went on for about a year. I complained to the person who runs the sheltered housing and the shouting became less frequent and eventually stopped all together, as a result we were able to train the dog to bark less in the garden.
About 6 months ago another resident of the flats moved flats (so I have been told) to one which overlooks our garden. He has now decided to start shouting "shut up" over and over again every time the dog is in the garden, of course, she is now barking back at him and undoing the training we have done with her. This has now reached the point where as soon as she makes any noise he is at his window shouting, he does this if the dog is out alone or with us or the children. We end up having to call the dog in to break the cycle which is not really fair on her.
It has reached the point where we, particularly the children, are uncomfortable being in the garden because he is standing at the window either shouting or waiting for a noise so he can shout.
Since this is sheltered housing and I have no idea of the vulnerability of the shouting man I do not think knocking on his door is a good idea.
I am planning to email the manager of the sheltered housing again this weekend, but, am struggling to decide what to write! Clearly this cannot go on, it must be incredibly annoying for the other residents of the flats as well as us, in fact, having spoken to a few of the other residents they have told me exactly that and they agree his shouting is the problem rather than our dog.
Any suggestions of next steps welcome!
About 2 years ago we got a dog, obviously she is allowed in the back garden to runs around, play and "relieve" herself. Being a dog, she does occasionally bark. We have a public footpath that runs along the back of the garden so she will hear other dogs, foxes, kids shouting on the footpath and bark to defend her territory. She is out with a dog walker every week day for about 6 hours so is probably in the garden for no more than 30 minutes in total during the day, never before 7.30am and never after 10pm (usually 9.30pm). Left alone she probably barks for a total of less than 5 minutes a day.
When we first got her one of the residents from the flats next door decided to start shouting out his window everytime she barked. He would shout "shut up" and make various threats about throwing poison, reporting to the council etc etc. Unfortunately his shouting just made the dog bark more as she was now "talking" to someone. This went on for about a year. I complained to the person who runs the sheltered housing and the shouting became less frequent and eventually stopped all together, as a result we were able to train the dog to bark less in the garden.
About 6 months ago another resident of the flats moved flats (so I have been told) to one which overlooks our garden. He has now decided to start shouting "shut up" over and over again every time the dog is in the garden, of course, she is now barking back at him and undoing the training we have done with her. This has now reached the point where as soon as she makes any noise he is at his window shouting, he does this if the dog is out alone or with us or the children. We end up having to call the dog in to break the cycle which is not really fair on her.
It has reached the point where we, particularly the children, are uncomfortable being in the garden because he is standing at the window either shouting or waiting for a noise so he can shout.
Since this is sheltered housing and I have no idea of the vulnerability of the shouting man I do not think knocking on his door is a good idea.
I am planning to email the manager of the sheltered housing again this weekend, but, am struggling to decide what to write! Clearly this cannot go on, it must be incredibly annoying for the other residents of the flats as well as us, in fact, having spoken to a few of the other residents they have told me exactly that and they agree his shouting is the problem rather than our dog.
Any suggestions of next steps welcome!
vaud said:
Don’t write, ask if you can pop round for a chat about an issue of concern.
Sometimes it’s best to start in person with a “hey I think we have an issue that I want to talk through and get you advice on” rather than formal emails, etc
I have considered that, however, being sheltered housing I am a bit reluctant to just turn up knocking on doors. I pretty sure there is a buzzer entry to the communal entrance and I don't know which flat is his. I am also concerned that I do not know the persons vulnerabilities (if any) and don't want to be accused of "frightening vulnerable elderly people".Sometimes it’s best to start in person with a “hey I think we have an issue that I want to talk through and get you advice on” rather than formal emails, etc
To add. When I replaced the fence on the boundary I was approached by one of the residents who immediately began shouting rather aggressively about a light in our garden which apparently shines into his flat stopping him from sleeping. I have dealt with that issue. I don't know for sure but suspect that was the person who is shouting out the window. Having experienced I am sure that knocking on his door for a friendly chat would not be a good idea.
I'd just go with something generic along the lines of "Hi I'm a neighbour of your property on XYZ road, would you be available to have a quick chat around some concerns I have around a residents behaviour" rather than go into super detail.
You'd hope most people are actually decent so if you don't go steaming in you should get a sensible response where you can talk about it rather than go all War and Peace as the first they hear about it.
You'd hope most people are actually decent so if you don't go steaming in you should get a sensible response where you can talk about it rather than go all War and Peace as the first they hear about it.
Constantly barking dogs are f
king annoying. Our old lady neighbour has some stupid little st-Sue which gets kicked out at all hours of the day or night which then proceeds to bark at pigeons, flies, trees, ghosts, whatever.
She’s even aware that it does this but does nothing about it and drives several of us nuts.
We live in a pretty quiet neighbourhood and it’s spoils the peace and quiet, so consideration for neighbours maybe should be taken into account, at least it sounds like you want to resolve the situation.
king annoying. Our old lady neighbour has some stupid little st-Sue which gets kicked out at all hours of the day or night which then proceeds to bark at pigeons, flies, trees, ghosts, whatever.She’s even aware that it does this but does nothing about it and drives several of us nuts.
We live in a pretty quiet neighbourhood and it’s spoils the peace and quiet, so consideration for neighbours maybe should be taken into account, at least it sounds like you want to resolve the situation.
Alickadoo said:
Their issue is that the dog keeps barking.
Can't you train it not to bark?
^ this.Can't you train it not to bark?
Dog goes outside, as soon as it barks tell it off and bring it in. It will soon learn that barking outside has a negative effect.
If it barks due to excitement when you/your children are playing with it, immediately stop playing with it till it calms down.
Barking dogs are annoying!
Barking dogs are a nuisance. I obviously don't live in sheltered housing, but my (otherwise perfect) neighbours have 2 x Corgis, and whenever they leave the house - either front door for a walk, or back door for toilet/whatever, they bark constantly, for about 30 seconds ("Oh shush, nobody wants to hear you say hello" is what the neighbours say to them). At 10pm, or at 5am, that is enough to wake our baby/the other kids - and at this time of year that's it, the kid won't go back down.
I wouldn't shout at their dogs, nor would I bring it up with the neighbours - they have a right to have dogs, and it's not their problem that we have a baby - but it is very frustrating.
Before anyone says it, yes the baby can cry at night, and the kids make noise when they play, but at "unsocial" hours I make sure the windows are shut or the kids are in.
I wouldn't shout at their dogs, nor would I bring it up with the neighbours - they have a right to have dogs, and it's not their problem that we have a baby - but it is very frustrating.
Before anyone says it, yes the baby can cry at night, and the kids make noise when they play, but at "unsocial" hours I make sure the windows are shut or the kids are in.
Never understood why people get a dog, and then employ a dog walker five days a week. Don't get a dog you don't have time for in the first place would be the obvious solution. Failing that, keep it inside until you have trained it not to disturb other people. I'm guessing you are out all day (hence the dog walker) so not being disturbed by this? Sounds like more entitled dog-owner BS to me (and I say that as a dog owner).
My next door neighbour has a barking dog. I've complained. He keeps it inside more, but the bark is so deep I hear it inside my house. I too have shouted at the fking thing after it nearly gave me a heart attack whilst gardening. It is quieter, but the dog is clearly nervous so why he can't train it properly is beyond me.
king thing after it nearly gave me a heart attack whilst gardening. It is quieter, but the dog is clearly nervous so why he can't train it properly is beyond me.edthedead said:
Left alone she probably barks for a total of less than 5 minutes a day.
How do you know if you're not there to hear it? The dog could bark from the minute you leave the house to the minute you get back, and you wouldn't know, but the neighbours, if retired, would have to listen to it all day long, which goes some way to explain their annoyance.
otolith said:
It sounds as if that's what he was doing until this person started shouting at the dog and undid the work.
Sounds like you can't possibly know that one way or the other. Same here with a neighbours dog that barks constantly the moment they let it out. It's the ignorance that gets on my tits as much as the endless noise. Not many bad dogs imo, no end of ste, entitled owners.Riley Blue said:
Olivera said:
Train your dog not to bark.
Training your dog not to bark is going to be much easier than persuading elderly people not to be annoyed by it, especially as from time to time they will pop off and be replaced by a fresh one.My Dad, aged 83, is (was) a total dog lover who cried buckets when our English Bull Terrier has to be put to sleep aged 14.
However he now has dementia and has recently gone into a care home. Over the last five years of his gradual decline we noticed him - a really chilled out, laid back kind of bloke in his day - becoming increasingly temperamental with tiny irritants in daily life, things that he would previously not have noticed became big issues for him.
One of these things was barking dogs. It didn't even have to be a lot of barking, the moment a dog would bark he would go "Shaddaaaap!!!", sometimes quite aggressively. It was after a few instances of this that I realised my Dad's brain was changing. He's still fundamentally a nice person and we haven't yet got to the aggressive stage of dementia that his sister got to, but it's a step in that direction. Small things start to irritate them. Your neighbour could be on a similar path, OP.
Obviously a polite "please stop shouting, you are scaring the children" convo with the sheltered accommodation manager might resolve this, but just be aware of the wider issues (it sounds like you are), as I was really surprised at my Dad ending up like this.
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