Refusing to look after friends dogs
Discussion
This is more about the possible decline in friendships than the actual looking after a friends dog, hence why I post in The Lounge.
Anyone here had fallouts with friends for not looking after their pets or for not doing something for them?
A couple of years ago a good friend asked if I would look after their two medium sized dogs whilst they went on holiday for 2 weeks, their original arrangement had fallen through and he refused to put them in kennels (which I understand) and he didn't want to leave them with a stranger (paid dog sitter). Despite having a dog myself I declined simply because his dogs jump all over settees and beds and they bark at the slightest thing. I told him I couldn't put up with their behaviour for a fortnight and I'd have to pen them in the hallway 24/7 and listen to them bark, which wasn't fair on his dogs either.
I could tell he was surprised and p!$$ed off with me, he couldn't understand why I wouldn't let them on my settee and said I could keep my bedroom door closed, he had clearly anticipated I'd do it as his friend. He did eventually find someone but the friendship has felt tainted ever since.
Personally I believe that if you choose to have a dog/pet then you shouldn't expect others to look after it, if they agree to have it then fine, but if you don't want to use kennels then either don't get a dog or don't go on holiday. Being miffed that your friend won't have your dogs when you allow them on your furniture is unreasonable and I think it's wrong to expect others to take on that burden, or to fall out with a friend just so you can sit by the pool for 2 weeks.
Rant over!
Anyone here had fallouts with friends for not looking after their pets or for not doing something for them?
A couple of years ago a good friend asked if I would look after their two medium sized dogs whilst they went on holiday for 2 weeks, their original arrangement had fallen through and he refused to put them in kennels (which I understand) and he didn't want to leave them with a stranger (paid dog sitter). Despite having a dog myself I declined simply because his dogs jump all over settees and beds and they bark at the slightest thing. I told him I couldn't put up with their behaviour for a fortnight and I'd have to pen them in the hallway 24/7 and listen to them bark, which wasn't fair on his dogs either.
I could tell he was surprised and p!$$ed off with me, he couldn't understand why I wouldn't let them on my settee and said I could keep my bedroom door closed, he had clearly anticipated I'd do it as his friend. He did eventually find someone but the friendship has felt tainted ever since.
Personally I believe that if you choose to have a dog/pet then you shouldn't expect others to look after it, if they agree to have it then fine, but if you don't want to use kennels then either don't get a dog or don't go on holiday. Being miffed that your friend won't have your dogs when you allow them on your furniture is unreasonable and I think it's wrong to expect others to take on that burden, or to fall out with a friend just so you can sit by the pool for 2 weeks.
Rant over!
The Gauge said:
I told him I couldn't put up with their behaviour for a fortnight and I'd have to pen them in the hallway 24/7 and listen to them bark, which wasn't fair on his dogs either.
To a lot of 'dog people' this would be like insulting their children.Secondly it is kind of insulting about how he has trained (or not) his dogs.
So while i completely understand your post and think it's perfectly reasonable to say no, it's also pretty obvious to me why he'd be miffed about what you said.
Can’t say I’ve fallen out with friends for such stupid reasons.
Thing is, I’d say no too. I have a dog and we have had another stay with us when his owner was hospitalised but we know the dog well, he’s old and lazy and both get on.
Taking on 2 more dogs that have a completely different rule set is madness.
Your friend needs to find a trusted family member or someone who’s 18-23 and living at home. Move them in as a house/dog sitter.
Thing is, I’d say no too. I have a dog and we have had another stay with us when his owner was hospitalised but we know the dog well, he’s old and lazy and both get on.
Taking on 2 more dogs that have a completely different rule set is madness.
Your friend needs to find a trusted family member or someone who’s 18-23 and living at home. Move them in as a house/dog sitter.
To be fair to him his original dog sitter had to cancel last minute so he was desperate. But if you have a pet you have to factor this in, especially if you refuse to use kennels. Once you agree to look after someone else's pet there's a danger they might expect you to have it every time they go on holiday. F*** dat!
That's a shame things have been soured since, but then how good a friend is he really?
I used to look after friends dogs, 2 springer spaniels. Both daft as a brush, but would come back on command when out for walks etc. Sadly no longer with us, I'd likely have had them again in a few weeks when he's at the Ryder Cup.
My own black lab died a few years ago, so I didn't have him to worry about either.
I used to look after friends dogs, 2 springer spaniels. Both daft as a brush, but would come back on command when out for walks etc. Sadly no longer with us, I'd likely have had them again in a few weeks when he's at the Ryder Cup.
My own black lab died a few years ago, so I didn't have him to worry about either.
andrebar said:
That’s a rather entitled ask & refusing it is no reason for a true friend to get p1ssed off about.
True. I think he assumed that as I have a dog then I'm a dog person who just loves all dogs, which I don't. I have to take to the dog to love it, and there has to be something about the dog for that to happen. My dog is actually my wife's dog as after our previous dogs died I decided I didn't want another, but my wife was desperate for another. I agreed we would have one but only if she was prepared to take on all responsibilities. That may sound strange but I just wasn't bothered about having another dog so it was important to be honest to her. The arrangement works perfectly, she does everything for our dog, feeds and walks it and they dote on each other, whilst I have the pleasure of walking it etc when I choose. But if dogs could talk he would probably say he wished I packed my bags and f***** off as I'm little use to him
So you can imagine why I wasn't fussed on looking after someone else's dog.
I happen to know a number of dog owners as they are more common than non dog owners now. All have said they don't like it when their friends with dogs come over, nor would they allow someone with a dog to rent one of their properties. Makes total sense, yeah? It's very tribal among dog owners. Not my kind of tribe. However, I would rather babysit someone's kids than look after some animal that will s
t, piss, dribble and leave hair/ dander all over the place. Yes, none dog owner here.
t, piss, dribble and leave hair/ dander all over the place. Yes, none dog owner here. budgie smuggler said:
To a lot of 'dog people' this would be like insulting their children.
Secondly it is kind of insulting about how he has trained (or not) his dogs.
So while i completely understand your post and think it's perfectly reasonable to say no, it's also pretty obvious to me why he'd be miffed about what you said.
Dog owners who let their dogs run free om shared trails in the outdoors always look shocked that anyone else can't be more responsible around their dogs random running around. Secondly it is kind of insulting about how he has trained (or not) his dogs.
So while i completely understand your post and think it's perfectly reasonable to say no, it's also pretty obvious to me why he'd be miffed about what you said.
Makes you wonder what makes these people tick.
One of the golden rules in life, don't criticise how people spend their money, how they bring up their children or how they manage their dog.
My dog is gone now but an enjoyable day was to park at a country pub, walk on hills and wood trails for five miles and back to the pub for lunch as long as they allowed in dogs. My dog was never on a lead and always by my side..
Personally I would have taken in the dogs and they would have been shown what was acceptable behaviour. Might have been hard work but so is life.
My dog is gone now but an enjoyable day was to park at a country pub, walk on hills and wood trails for five miles and back to the pub for lunch as long as they allowed in dogs. My dog was never on a lead and always by my side..
Personally I would have taken in the dogs and they would have been shown what was acceptable behaviour. Might have been hard work but so is life.
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