Covid loner- driving friends to become acquaintances

[Hugo Stiglitz]

Covid didn't affect me physically. Throughout covid I worked in the emergency services with zero protection. No masks.

First my wife noticed, then my young son and then realisation - I've ignored friends, ignored messages and calls and driven people away.

Anyone else? What did you do next? How are you doing?

[GilletteFan]

A lot of people have become withdrawn and are now solely focused on their own hobbies and/or have fully embraced the doting hellicopter parent lifestyle.

If you want to have a great social life, head down to your local boozer or associate yourself with people that need to drink. Otherwise, everyone else is busy doing their own things.

[Randy Winkman]

I am sympathetic but also think that a lot of this is simply down to habit and can be changed fairly easily. By nature I'm not a particularly sociable person but that is mostly down to habit rather than any fundamental thing about me. If I make the effort I enjoy socialising and just need to get into the routine of keeping in contact with people and stop finding excuses not to meet them.

[Bathroom_Security]

GilletteFan said:

If you want to have a great social life, head down to your local boozer or associate yourself with people that need to drink.

Sounds like a great time

(I figured your post was sarcastic, mine absolutely is)

[GilletteFan]

Bathroom_Security said:

Sounds like a great time

(I figured your post was sarcastic, mine absolutely is)

You got that right!

[geeks]

Hugo, tough break (though I am not sure what masks have to do with anything). I guess the question is, do you want that to change?

Bathroom_Security said:

GilletteFan said:

If you want to have a great social life, head down to your local boozer or associate yourself with people that need to drink.

Sounds like a great time

(I figured your post was sarcastic, mine absolutely is)

It isn't that poster has some weird arse posting history I can never tell if its a troll account or not!

[TameRacingDriver]

GilletteFan said:

Bathroom_Security said:

Sounds like a great time

(I figured your post was sarcastic, mine absolutely is)

You got that right!

No doubt that was the usually snooty attempt at a dig at those who like a drink, as has become fashionable nowadays, but ironically, it's actually a pretty good idea if the OP wants a good way of socialising.

[paulwirral]

TameRacingDriver said:

GilletteFan said:

Bathroom_Security said:

Sounds like a great time

(I figured your post was sarcastic, mine absolutely is)

You got that right!

No doubt that was the usually snooty attempt at a dig at those who like a drink, as has become fashionable nowadays, but ironically, it's actually a pretty good idea if the OP wants a good way of socialising.

Shh , don’t let them in on the secret

[GreatGranny]

OP, struggling to believe you worked in the emergency services all through Covid never wearing a mask.

[anonymous-user]

Hugo Stiglitz said:

Covid didn't affect me physically. Throughout covid I worked in the emergency services with zero protection. No masks.

First my wife noticed, then my young son and then realisation - I've ignored friends, ignored messages and calls and driven people away.

Anyone else? What did you do next? How are you doing?

For me, once Covid arrived i then found out how many people were actually interested enough to check up on me, especially after the first time i got it, it almost killed me with the pneumonia complications.

I then made a conscious decision that if it is always me chasing other people then why am i putting myself through it? So i just stopped chasing people.
I'm doing okay thanks, no i don't have many friends but i am okay with the ones i do have and if people don't like the fact i am no longer chasing them for chats, then it just shows they were never really friends.

But overall, i'm good thanks

[Nethybridge]

Pubs are not the answer, people who spend their leisure
hours propping up a bar every night are not the solutions
to your torpor .


OK it's possible to meet a genius, sagacious barfly
in the style of Brendan Beehan or a Dylan Thomas
but mostly they'll be windbags and pissheads.

[119]

No not us, remained in contact throughout and carried on after and i don't see how one wouldn't though?

We did do a lot of pub quizzes on Zoom however.

[bobbo89]

I had a whole social group of friends collapse because of it.

Used to go to loads of VW festivals in the summer and meet up in the winter for food/drink. WhatsApp group wen't quiet over 2020 then died completely in 2021 and now barely hear a peep from anyone other than see what they're up to on Insta. There are people I used to see all the time that I've not seen or heard from in nearing 4 years now!

Sad really but it's a common story I've heard a fair few people have experienced now, not just friendships either, seen relationships break down too.

Another thing that died was the social side of work, office is a ghost town now and no-one goes out for drinks anymore other than for the odd leaving do. We used to go out for day sessions to city centres and all sorts!

Edited by bobbo89 on Tuesday 7th November 14:49

[119]

But this could also be seen as a positive that has weeded out some people you are not keen on from your life.

[KobayashiMaru86]

The ones I was finding it was always me pushing have dropped away and looking back it was no loss. Can count my friends on one hand now but they are the good ones. Dating life is even harder now but that's for another thread.

[TameRacingDriver]

Nethybridge said:

Pubs are not the answer, people who spend their leisure
hours propping up a bar every night are not the solutions
to your torpor .


OK it's possible to meet a genius, sagacious barfly
in the style of Brendan Beehan or a Dylan Thomas
but mostly they'll be windbags and pissheads.

You do know that you don't exactly need to go every night to socialise, don't you? I seem to manage fine going once a week or so on average.

I have met some great people in pubs. Again, this is just snobbery. I reckon it's more than likely that many people taking pot shots at drinkers in pubs from the comfort of their computer at home are many of those who are complaining about having no friends

[Smint]

The drunk on power utterly destroyed the country via lockdown and the rest of the balls ups of the farce ofthe last 3.5 years, not justthe economic ruin from which the country as a whole and its people will never recover, but also socially from which it also won't recover, lives forever disrupted and diminshed, for what?

Thankfully there's the current covid inquiry running its course which will no doubt return the desired verdict, ie that we didn't lock down quickly or hard enough lessons will be learned blah blah all the usual bullshine, and those who shoul;d be held responsible for the destruction instead of spending the rest of their miserable lives in solitary penury will instead waltz off laden down with the £millions they've trousered during and since and live happily ever after, no one will be held responsible, villains will be praised and knighted, anyone who didn't read from the correct hymnsheet will be damned, twas ever thus.

Thomas Sowell would as always have the right words for what has and will happen
"It is hard to imagine a more stupid or more dangerous way of making decisions than by putting those decisions in the hands of people who pay no price for being wrong"

[Steve H]

Daaaamn, you were just waiting for this thread to come along weren’t you

[x5tuu]

I have had the opposite to be honest - part of a really good group of similar minded chaps on WA made up mostly of PH people that almost all met on the WA group link.

Relationships with colleagues have gone from strength to strength as we all lean into one another for various things and expertise (we are in the health sector too) and people are making more effort now than ever before to maintain physical connections rather than just virtual.

I don't think any friendships fell at the wayside that wouldn't have over time anyways - its probably just accelerated things due to the realisation that every one wants something different than whats been on offer.

[cliffords]

I did learn a bit about myself during the COVID period. I found I do like my own company and I am very good at being on my own. I am married live with my wife of 30 plus years .I like my dogs a lot more than many of my friends , and many of my friends are not friends just people I know . I hate much of what happened and regret the loss of life and damage to economy and mental health etc. I did not hate the lockdowns though at all.