Divorce Law - is this right?
Discussion
A relative of mine is getting divorced.
Over the weekend she was telling me it's costing £10k in solicitors fees.
Her husband left her ten years ago and went off with another woman and they have a child who is disabled.
Her ex-husband now wants a divorce and wants the house sold, she doesn't have lots of money to throw around, whilst he's got his own company and numerous pensions.
I was staggered to hear that she isn't entitled to any of his pension or business proceeds, whereas he's told her she needs to move their child into assisted living and move into a 1 bedroom flat herself.
When I questioned this, she said her solicitor told her the law changed five years ago and she isn't entitled to anything of his.
Does this sound right?
Over the weekend she was telling me it's costing £10k in solicitors fees.
Her husband left her ten years ago and went off with another woman and they have a child who is disabled.
Her ex-husband now wants a divorce and wants the house sold, she doesn't have lots of money to throw around, whilst he's got his own company and numerous pensions.
I was staggered to hear that she isn't entitled to any of his pension or business proceeds, whereas he's told her she needs to move their child into assisted living and move into a 1 bedroom flat herself.
When I questioned this, she said her solicitor told her the law changed five years ago and she isn't entitled to anything of his.
Does this sound right?
Yep, Solicitors are expensive. My divorce last year was around £12k.
You say her ex left her 10 years ago. It seems he is already considered an ‘ex’ in her eyes and his.
If they have a mutually agreed separation going back that far then perhaps that’s the issue?
A long marriage is now 10 years and the goal there in the Courts is 50/50.
If her marriage effectively became officially separated before a long marriage then maybe that has a bearing.
She can get a second opinion easy enough. I got them free from other Solicitors when double-checking something I wanted querying with my legal advice - just part of initial consultation.
You say her ex left her 10 years ago. It seems he is already considered an ‘ex’ in her eyes and his.
If they have a mutually agreed separation going back that far then perhaps that’s the issue?
A long marriage is now 10 years and the goal there in the Courts is 50/50.
If her marriage effectively became officially separated before a long marriage then maybe that has a bearing.
She can get a second opinion easy enough. I got them free from other Solicitors when double-checking something I wanted querying with my legal advice - just part of initial consultation.
Edited by YorkshireStu on Monday 18th December 11:26
YorkshireStu said:
Yep, Solicitors are expensive. My divorce last year was around £12k.
You say her ex left her 10 years ago. It seems he is already considered an ‘ex’ in her eyes and his.
If they have a mutually agreed separation going back that far then perhaps that’s the issue?
A long marriage is now 10 years and the goal there in the Courts is 50/50.
If her marriage effectively became officially separated before a long marriage then maybe that has a bearing.
She can get a second opinion easy enough. I got them free from other Solicitors when double-checking something I wanted querying with my legal advice - just part of initial consultation.
For context, they were married for 18 years before he left.You say her ex left her 10 years ago. It seems he is already considered an ‘ex’ in her eyes and his.
If they have a mutually agreed separation going back that far then perhaps that’s the issue?
A long marriage is now 10 years and the goal there in the Courts is 50/50.
If her marriage effectively became officially separated before a long marriage then maybe that has a bearing.
She can get a second opinion easy enough. I got them free from other Solicitors when double-checking something I wanted querying with my legal advice - just part of initial consultation.
Edited by YorkshireStu on Monday 18th December 11:26
In short, no - it might be that she's come away having misunderstood.
I suggests she asks the solicitor to clarify in writing what was said about her entitlement and the particular law change that was mentioned. If she's lost confidence in this one, get another, ideally with the Family Law Accreditation.
18 years is a long marriage and if they haven't already divorced and settled finances, then starting point is generally half. Disabled child also deserves needs to be properly met.
I suggests she asks the solicitor to clarify in writing what was said about her entitlement and the particular law change that was mentioned. If she's lost confidence in this one, get another, ideally with the Family Law Accreditation.
18 years is a long marriage and if they haven't already divorced and settled finances, then starting point is generally half. Disabled child also deserves needs to be properly met.
Sounds like they didn't have a financial settlement at the time they split. I don't want to get her hopes up but:
https://www.theguardian.com/law/2015/mar/11/woman-...
Divorce is expensive. Ways to keep the costs down are:
- don't use your solicitor as a counsellor. That's what friends and alcohol are for
- don't use your solicitor as a data gatherer or paper shuffler. That's what your time is for. Keep the solicitor to what they do best and if you can, draft the responses to letters yourself.
- get a copy of the Dummies guide, but make sure you get the UK version.
https://www.theguardian.com/law/2015/mar/11/woman-...
Divorce is expensive. Ways to keep the costs down are:
- don't use your solicitor as a counsellor. That's what friends and alcohol are for
- don't use your solicitor as a data gatherer or paper shuffler. That's what your time is for. Keep the solicitor to what they do best and if you can, draft the responses to letters yourself.
- get a copy of the Dummies guide, but make sure you get the UK version.
Costs can be as much as you like. One of my mates is recently divorced. He was a sparing as possible with the legals and racked up about £5k in costs. His wife just used the solicitors with gay abandon and now has a deby of about £16k. Another mate is currently going through it and again he is keeping costs to the bare minimum but his wife has recently said she is having to get a loan to pay for solicitors costs (she is being very difficult) and the loan is to be covered by their estate so my mate is paying about 80% of the fee for the people against him!
Suppose one thing that may be in play with your mate, did the bloke amass all his assets after they had split, so maybe they are out of bounds for sharing or he has already nominated his new bird as the beneficiary of his pensions?
Suppose one thing that may be in play with your mate, did the bloke amass all his assets after they had split, so maybe they are out of bounds for sharing or he has already nominated his new bird as the beneficiary of his pensions?
RB Will said:
Costs can be as much as you like. One of my mates is recently divorced. He was a sparing as possible with the legals and racked up about £5k in costs. His wife just used the solicitors with gay abandon and now has a deby of about £16k. Another mate is currently going through it and again he is keeping costs to the bare minimum but his wife has recently said she is having to get a loan to pay for solicitors costs (she is being very difficult) and the loan is to be covered by their estate so my mate is paying about 80% of the fee for the people against him!
Suppose one thing that may be in play with your mate, did the bloke amass all his assets after they had split, so maybe they are out of bounds for sharing or he has already nominated his new bird as the beneficiary of his pensions?
The company was founded after they split so not sure how the law views that.Suppose one thing that may be in play with your mate, did the bloke amass all his assets after they had split, so maybe they are out of bounds for sharing or he has already nominated his new bird as the beneficiary of his pensions?
His main pension was amassed whilst still living together though.
Irrelevant if any financial agreement was made between the parties, as this can only be done legally after the divorce itself has been finalised anyway, and is then done via a financial order sanctioned by a judge.
Up until such everything goes into the pot to be divided up, regardless of whether it existed pre or post separation.
You can divorce someone for about £500 and do it all yourself online, no solicitors required. after that you then sort the finances.
She needs better advice.
Up until such everything goes into the pot to be divided up, regardless of whether it existed pre or post separation.
You can divorce someone for about £500 and do it all yourself online, no solicitors required. after that you then sort the finances.
She needs better advice.
PAUL.S. said:
Irrelevant if any financial agreement was made between the parties, as this can only be done legally after the divorce itself has been finalised anyway, and is then done via a financial order sanctioned by a judge.
Up until such everything goes into the pot to be divided up, regardless of whether it existed pre or post separation.
You can divorce someone for about £500 and do it all yourself online, no solicitors required. after that you then sort the finances.
She needs better advice.
Not a lawyer but I think post separation assets are their own category and it depends. A business set up post separation is unlikely to be divided 50/50. Up until such everything goes into the pot to be divided up, regardless of whether it existed pre or post separation.
You can divorce someone for about £500 and do it all yourself online, no solicitors required. after that you then sort the finances.
She needs better advice.
I've seen three solicitors in the past months about divorce from my wife who wanted separation 13 years ago.
Odd that your friend being female seems to not be getting any advantages seeing that the law is heavily in favour of the woman.
Despite my alcoholic wife having blown a £400,000 inheritance in a year and a half and still living in the house with 2 of our kids it seems if I divorce her, I'll lose tons of the little money I have and not see much from the sale of the house, plus half my meagre pensions.
Solicitors have also told me that I may have to pay her spousal maintenance as she no longer works (too drunk).
Your friend needs to get good legal advice.
Odd that your friend being female seems to not be getting any advantages seeing that the law is heavily in favour of the woman.
Despite my alcoholic wife having blown a £400,000 inheritance in a year and a half and still living in the house with 2 of our kids it seems if I divorce her, I'll lose tons of the little money I have and not see much from the sale of the house, plus half my meagre pensions.
Solicitors have also told me that I may have to pay her spousal maintenance as she no longer works (too drunk).
Your friend needs to get good legal advice.
Zoon said:
When I questioned this, she said her solicitor told her the law changed five years ago and she isn't entitled to anything of his.
Does this sound right?
There was a legal case in 2014 where a business established post separation was treated as entirely non-matrimonial assets. If they are talking about 5 years ago then this might be the precedent. Does this sound right?
Still though the answer is it depends as it is not only the assets and when acquired but needs of both parties.
Sounds like this is definitely a case of being told what he wants your relative to believe rather than what will happen. I suspect her solicitor will having a significantly different view.
It's important to understand a simple point in divorces and court rulings these days. It's not 50:50, nor is it "getting taken to the cleaners" if you are the financially better off partner.
Simple thing they are looking for is to get both parties into a position where they can be financially independent of the other. That doesn't mean parity necessarily and if you can work to support yourself, then there is an understanding that you should and not merely depend on the payments from the other party.
Children and their care are always put first. When it comes to children with additional needs, it's not as simple as "putting them in assisted care" and your relative having to accept that.
Pensions and the like are on the table no matter what. There could be an argument that the pot at the time of the split may be whats in play and anything since is ringfenced but that would be open to negotiation and used as leverage against something else.
Pre-matrimonial assets are pretty easy to argue, especially if the other party has had no involvement or derived no benefit from them - post, not so sure but possibly the same argument.
As said by others, divorces can be as cheap or as expensive as you are willing to make them. My own cost about £1200 three years ago and we were dealing with multiple businesses on my behalf, pensions, shares, property and savings.
If you are able to speak between each other, do it. Get it all agreed and only use the solicitors to ratify your decision and get it forwarded onto the courts for judgement.
In hindsight, i can see now that the only thing losing your temper in conversations about finances brings is cost in the form of solicitors costs.
Good luck to your relative.
It's important to understand a simple point in divorces and court rulings these days. It's not 50:50, nor is it "getting taken to the cleaners" if you are the financially better off partner.
Simple thing they are looking for is to get both parties into a position where they can be financially independent of the other. That doesn't mean parity necessarily and if you can work to support yourself, then there is an understanding that you should and not merely depend on the payments from the other party.
Children and their care are always put first. When it comes to children with additional needs, it's not as simple as "putting them in assisted care" and your relative having to accept that.
Pensions and the like are on the table no matter what. There could be an argument that the pot at the time of the split may be whats in play and anything since is ringfenced but that would be open to negotiation and used as leverage against something else.
Pre-matrimonial assets are pretty easy to argue, especially if the other party has had no involvement or derived no benefit from them - post, not so sure but possibly the same argument.
As said by others, divorces can be as cheap or as expensive as you are willing to make them. My own cost about £1200 three years ago and we were dealing with multiple businesses on my behalf, pensions, shares, property and savings.
If you are able to speak between each other, do it. Get it all agreed and only use the solicitors to ratify your decision and get it forwarded onto the courts for judgement.
In hindsight, i can see now that the only thing losing your temper in conversations about finances brings is cost in the form of solicitors costs.
Good luck to your relative.
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