Discussion
This may not be in the right area, mods feel free to move if so.
I am a fussy eater, ridiculously so. I would really like to change if possible.
I don't eat meat, apart from ultra processed rubbish like Corned beef, SPAM, Burgers occasionally.
If it was as simple as just being Vegetarian that would be easy, but I don't eat beans or Tomatoes so this precludes lots of vegie stuff too.
I usually exist on bland food like vegie sausages, eggs, bread & cheese etc.
Part of my issue is with the texture of things. I can't stand having to chew anything for any length of time, hence not eating meat. I decide by looking that I don't like things and I get completely stressed out when dining out sometimes.
I like fish but only white fish, don't like Salmon, Tuna etc.......and struggle to understand how other people can like these things.
So, the point of this post.
How do I change things? Has anyone tried therapy? How about hypnotherapy?
I would be very grateful for any tips or advice anyone can give.
Just for additional info, I have always been like this and never been any different in my 62 years. Despite the restricted diet I am fit (running, Swimming, Cycling), active and a healthy weight BMI.
Cheers
Brian
I am a fussy eater, ridiculously so. I would really like to change if possible.
I don't eat meat, apart from ultra processed rubbish like Corned beef, SPAM, Burgers occasionally.
If it was as simple as just being Vegetarian that would be easy, but I don't eat beans or Tomatoes so this precludes lots of vegie stuff too.
I usually exist on bland food like vegie sausages, eggs, bread & cheese etc.
Part of my issue is with the texture of things. I can't stand having to chew anything for any length of time, hence not eating meat. I decide by looking that I don't like things and I get completely stressed out when dining out sometimes.
I like fish but only white fish, don't like Salmon, Tuna etc.......and struggle to understand how other people can like these things.
So, the point of this post.
How do I change things? Has anyone tried therapy? How about hypnotherapy?
I would be very grateful for any tips or advice anyone can give.
Just for additional info, I have always been like this and never been any different in my 62 years. Despite the restricted diet I am fit (running, Swimming, Cycling), active and a healthy weight BMI.
Cheers
Brian
It's not going to cure you, but you'll probably find this podcast episode interesting: https://www.searchengine.show/can-you-cure-picky-e...
(As an aside, good podcast generally!)
(As an aside, good podcast generally!)
This sounds like a sensory issue rather than the (unfortunately belittling phrase) fussy eating.
My daughter suffers from sensory processing issues and manages it very well, but there are a few things we have used over the years to help.
We always had a rule of trying something 20 times, and only trying one new thing at a time.
Too often with food you find that moving out of a known comfort zone involves multiple new flavours, textures & sensations.
So switch one item, if you are fine with burgers swap the beef patty out for a thin minuet steak, keep every other ingredient the same.
This will get you accustomed to the texture of meat in a friendly way rather than just slapping a whole steak on your plate.
Similarly with veg, just add one new thing at a time over time.
My daughter once would have eat nothing but spaghetti bolognaise & cheese sandwiches & now has a very adventurous palate.
Don’t put yourself down, be disciplined about trying things 20 times. If after 20 goes (which could take as long as you like, you don’t have to eat steak burgers for 20 consecutive days!) you still don’t like it then fine. But at least you know you have tried.
Good luck.
My daughter suffers from sensory processing issues and manages it very well, but there are a few things we have used over the years to help.
We always had a rule of trying something 20 times, and only trying one new thing at a time.
Too often with food you find that moving out of a known comfort zone involves multiple new flavours, textures & sensations.
So switch one item, if you are fine with burgers swap the beef patty out for a thin minuet steak, keep every other ingredient the same.
This will get you accustomed to the texture of meat in a friendly way rather than just slapping a whole steak on your plate.
Similarly with veg, just add one new thing at a time over time.
My daughter once would have eat nothing but spaghetti bolognaise & cheese sandwiches & now has a very adventurous palate.
Don’t put yourself down, be disciplined about trying things 20 times. If after 20 goes (which could take as long as you like, you don’t have to eat steak burgers for 20 consecutive days!) you still don’t like it then fine. But at least you know you have tried.
Good luck.
You can process meat and fish to be soft and textureless as well.
I ve made plenty of mistakes trying to make fishcakes, meatballs, sausages etc. Depends on the coarseness of grind, binding ingredients and cooking. Could get a food processor and experiment, get these to your preference.
Obviously its much better for your health to buy fresh produce and make it yourself at home.
Also there are meal planning apps, you can stick in foods you don t like, it will return recipes excluding those ingredients, create a shopping list etc.
No need to be stuck or force yourself.
I ve made plenty of mistakes trying to make fishcakes, meatballs, sausages etc. Depends on the coarseness of grind, binding ingredients and cooking. Could get a food processor and experiment, get these to your preference.
Obviously its much better for your health to buy fresh produce and make it yourself at home.
Also there are meal planning apps, you can stick in foods you don t like, it will return recipes excluding those ingredients, create a shopping list etc.
No need to be stuck or force yourself.
We are pretty hard wired not to eat things that can harm us. We have a gag reflex for a reason and unusual textures (mushrooms, molluscs, eggs) and bitter tastes (cabbage broccoli) can be difficult to overcome. You've got two options if you want to eat healthily
1) Work out a programme to address your sensory issues. The try something new one at a time and 20 times before giving up is a decent strategy. However I predict this is going to be difficult as I suspect inflexibility and difficulty with novelty are not limited to food and part of who you are. Writing a list of target foods, prioritising them and ticking them off one by one could help gamify the process and have you eating 'normally' in a year.
2) Learning to cook so you can process healthy foods into textures that are acceptable. Anything can be blended into a soup. All meat can be minced. Beans can be squashed and pureed. Almost anything can be combined with mashed potatoes rolled in flour, egg, and breadcrumbs and fried (maybe not the healthiest option) Food might lose its culinary appeal for others but it won't lose its nutritional value.
First option is definitely the best as fussiness of this nature is socially crippling. Not very kind to say but people will judge you and wonder in what other ways you're not a fully formed adult. It might help if you recruit someone to support you. If there's no one to support you could make a social media project out of it (at minimum keeping this thread going with progress updates and photos) and the support will come.
1) Work out a programme to address your sensory issues. The try something new one at a time and 20 times before giving up is a decent strategy. However I predict this is going to be difficult as I suspect inflexibility and difficulty with novelty are not limited to food and part of who you are. Writing a list of target foods, prioritising them and ticking them off one by one could help gamify the process and have you eating 'normally' in a year.
2) Learning to cook so you can process healthy foods into textures that are acceptable. Anything can be blended into a soup. All meat can be minced. Beans can be squashed and pureed. Almost anything can be combined with mashed potatoes rolled in flour, egg, and breadcrumbs and fried (maybe not the healthiest option) Food might lose its culinary appeal for others but it won't lose its nutritional value.
First option is definitely the best as fussiness of this nature is socially crippling. Not very kind to say but people will judge you and wonder in what other ways you're not a fully formed adult. It might help if you recruit someone to support you. If there's no one to support you could make a social media project out of it (at minimum keeping this thread going with progress updates and photos) and the support will come.
This sounds alot like me, have a read about a condition called afrid. It does slightly improve over time but take huge amounts of work.
I also saw an hypnotherapist called David killmurry which helped with the texture issue so sort of gives you the tools to improve.
I'm convinced its a mental health issue as mine seems to get worse when depression or stress increases.
I also saw an hypnotherapist called David killmurry which helped with the texture issue so sort of gives you the tools to improve.
I'm convinced its a mental health issue as mine seems to get worse when depression or stress increases.
Edited by Greenbot35 on Sunday 20th July 13:59
You eat meat just don't like chewing for ages.
Lidl is you friend here, they sell packs of steak mince, not cheap fatty pap, which is minced really fine, tastes lovely, cook some with mashed potatoes on top = a good old cottage pie, blinking lovely, for vegetables, try sweetheart cabbage and petit pois (nicer than standard peas) to go with it, slowly slowly introduce other vegs and fruit one at a time.
Don't buy cheap tomatoes, might as well eat the packaging, buy vine ripened that have some taste, world of difference.
Mature/Vintage Cheddar Cheese, Farm Foods own label is one of the best we've tried and good value, has a better texture than others.
Bread? try Warburtons Seeded Loaf, chedder cheese sliced vine toms iceburg lettuce mayo sandwich in seeded bread makes a much tastier brunch than some fast food pap.
For white fish nip into Farm Foods if one nearby, they sell large bags of frozen Haddock and Cod fillets at very reasonable prices, much better than those battered/breadcrumbed rip offs found elsewhere where the actual fish content is a sliver at best.
Tinned Tuna doesn't make a bad sandwich if you fancy trying it, i share your dislike of other dark fish such as salmon/trout, too fishy for me.
Once you start to branch out it gets easier.
It often goes back to childhood and dare i say it lazy parents, we've had other peoples kids here who only eat junk, my fine lady wife being Greek has to feed everyone that sets foot in the house, 'oh he won't eat anything but chips', yeah righto watch what happens when my Mrs shoves a roast dinner in front of him together with her home made gravy...seen young lads one of whom who previously lived solely on chips and nuggets put her roasts away like a staving man.
Lidl is you friend here, they sell packs of steak mince, not cheap fatty pap, which is minced really fine, tastes lovely, cook some with mashed potatoes on top = a good old cottage pie, blinking lovely, for vegetables, try sweetheart cabbage and petit pois (nicer than standard peas) to go with it, slowly slowly introduce other vegs and fruit one at a time.
Don't buy cheap tomatoes, might as well eat the packaging, buy vine ripened that have some taste, world of difference.
Mature/Vintage Cheddar Cheese, Farm Foods own label is one of the best we've tried and good value, has a better texture than others.
Bread? try Warburtons Seeded Loaf, chedder cheese sliced vine toms iceburg lettuce mayo sandwich in seeded bread makes a much tastier brunch than some fast food pap.
For white fish nip into Farm Foods if one nearby, they sell large bags of frozen Haddock and Cod fillets at very reasonable prices, much better than those battered/breadcrumbed rip offs found elsewhere where the actual fish content is a sliver at best.
Tinned Tuna doesn't make a bad sandwich if you fancy trying it, i share your dislike of other dark fish such as salmon/trout, too fishy for me.
Once you start to branch out it gets easier.
It often goes back to childhood and dare i say it lazy parents, we've had other peoples kids here who only eat junk, my fine lady wife being Greek has to feed everyone that sets foot in the house, 'oh he won't eat anything but chips', yeah righto watch what happens when my Mrs shoves a roast dinner in front of him together with her home made gravy...seen young lads one of whom who previously lived solely on chips and nuggets put her roasts away like a staving man.
Smint said:
It often goes back to childhood and dare i say it lazy parents, we've had other peoples kids here who only eat junk, my fine lady wife being Greek has to feed everyone that sets foot in the house, 'oh he won't eat anything but chips', yeah righto watch what happens when my Mrs shoves a roast dinner in front of him together with her home made gravy...seen young lads one of whom who previously lived solely on chips and nuggets put her roasts away like a staving man.
I think parents have a lot to answer for in producing adults with infantile food habits but it's not always about food. Friend with terribly picky kids who made their life, particularly the mum, a misery. And they are really into their food. Mum really trying to make mealtimes work with choice of healthy food available, possibily a bit too strict with treats but one daughter, particularly, dragging it out into a performance.I was doing a barbecue, OH wanted me to 'cater' to them. I was 'f
k that. They can eat what I make or they go hungry'It was actually pretty embarrassing. Their kids were eating like ravening wolves including chewing meat off bones. Caught one of them giving side eye to the mum whilst doing it. It was clearly a behaviour/control issue between daughters and mum.
Thanks everyone, some good advice there and it's good to know I am not the only person with eating issues.
Even as a baby I wouldn't eat what other babies ate. I am one of 7 kids (2nd youngest) and grew up with us, plus parents, all living in a 3 bed council house so I don't think there was ever the time to try and figure out. Simpler times too, how many people went home to egg and chips for tea.
I have actually improved since my early years. I used to live on Sausage Rolls, Cornish Pasties....etc
Since I met my wife 20 odd years ago things improved but they seem to be regressing at the moment.
I don't think I ever really want to eat meat but I would love to just be able to eat a normal vegetarian meal and not worry if it had tomatoes in, or mushrooms etc
I am going to do some more research and see if I can find a local CBT councillor that can help.
Cheers
Brian
Even as a baby I wouldn't eat what other babies ate. I am one of 7 kids (2nd youngest) and grew up with us, plus parents, all living in a 3 bed council house so I don't think there was ever the time to try and figure out. Simpler times too, how many people went home to egg and chips for tea.
I have actually improved since my early years. I used to live on Sausage Rolls, Cornish Pasties....etc
Since I met my wife 20 odd years ago things improved but they seem to be regressing at the moment.
I don't think I ever really want to eat meat but I would love to just be able to eat a normal vegetarian meal and not worry if it had tomatoes in, or mushrooms etc
I am going to do some more research and see if I can find a local CBT councillor that can help.
Cheers
Brian
Greenbot35 said:
This sounds alot like me, have a read about a condition called afrid. It does slightly improve over time but take huge amounts of work.
ARFiD was what I immediately thought. My son is only 5 1/2 but what the Op describes matches his eating habits very well. He is completely incapable of chewing and processing food quickly, anything too stodgy or chewy just seems to fill up his mouth indefinitely.
We've seen dietary specialists and watched long lectures from ARFID consultants etc. There's a lot of autism/sensory issues linked to it.
As for what you can actually do about it. Try things, repetitively and in small amounts. You simply have to allow/make your brain get used to things, or try to. But it may not work, if you've had these issues or your life and not really got anywhere with it then there's a good chance you won't suddenly solve it now.
We knew our son had eating issues from 6 months really, as soon as he started on any solid food. He just didn't eat in the same way as his peers. He's not driven by food, doesn't seem to enjoy eating (bar a few very particular things) and just seems to find getting food down quickly and impossible task. He's also very loathe to ever move away from his 'safe' foods, usually things that are fairly bland and very predictable in shape/look/texture etc.
5 years in and I can't see him ever drastically changing. We work on it, we encourage any new food he tries, however basic, and we constantly remind him to chew, swallow, pick up something to eat! Maybe with an earlier understanding of his own issues he'll find some ways to manage and work past them, who knows!
Good luck...
Japveesix said:
Greenbot35 said:
This sounds alot like me, have a read about a condition called afrid. It does slightly improve over time but take huge amounts of work.
ARFiD was what I immediately thought. My son is only 5 1/2 but what the Op describes matches his eating habits very well. He is completely incapable of chewing and processing food quickly, anything too stodgy or chewy just seems to fill up his mouth indefinitely.
We've seen dietary specialists and watched long lectures from ARFID consultants etc. There's a lot of autism/sensory issues linked to it.
As for what you can actually do about it. Try things, repetitively and in small amounts. You simply have to allow/make your brain get used to things, or try to. But it may not work, if you've had these issues or your life and not really got anywhere with it then there's a good chance you won't suddenly solve it now.
We knew our son had eating issues from 6 months really, as soon as he started on any solid food. He just didn't eat in the same way as his peers. He's not driven by food, doesn't seem to enjoy eating (bar a few very particular things) and just seems to find getting food down quickly and impossible task. He's also very loathe to ever move away from his 'safe' foods, usually things that are fairly bland and very predictable in shape/look/texture etc.
5 years in and I can't see him ever drastically changing. We work on it, we encourage any new food he tries, however basic, and we constantly remind him to chew, swallow, pick up something to eat! Maybe with an earlier understanding of his own issues he'll find some ways to manage and work past them, who knows!
Good luck...
And none of it works, especially not the numerous people who said "he'll grow out of it", "all kids can be fussy" etc without actually listening to us or understanding how deeply ingrained his issues were.
Thanks everyone, this is really helping me understand more about my eating issue. I had never heard of AFRiD. A lot of what I have just read really resonates with me.
Thankfully I love fruit and I do like vegetables so I can get some variety. I am going to make an appointment at my GP in the first instance and see how I get on.
I am sure a lot of it is a combination of visual fear and an irrational fear of the unknown. I look at my wife's food sometimes and think how can anyone eat that? Even just a simple chicken and rice dish and it repulses me. So much so I couldn't try it even if I wanted to.
Maybe I should try eating while wearing a blindfold with a peg on my nose.
The strange thing is, I run a mile from anything I don't like the look off, unless it's something sweet. In that instance I just pop it in my mouth and see if I like it or not.
I am just back from holiday in Turkey and I had 3 day's of not being well but even taking that into consideration, I lost over 1.5 stone in 10 days because I could not find anything to eat. This is also putting a strain on things at home which isn't helping.
I really appreciate everyone who has taken the time to post a reply.
Brian
Thankfully I love fruit and I do like vegetables so I can get some variety. I am going to make an appointment at my GP in the first instance and see how I get on.
I am sure a lot of it is a combination of visual fear and an irrational fear of the unknown. I look at my wife's food sometimes and think how can anyone eat that? Even just a simple chicken and rice dish and it repulses me. So much so I couldn't try it even if I wanted to.
Maybe I should try eating while wearing a blindfold with a peg on my nose.
The strange thing is, I run a mile from anything I don't like the look off, unless it's something sweet. In that instance I just pop it in my mouth and see if I like it or not.
I am just back from holiday in Turkey and I had 3 day's of not being well but even taking that into consideration, I lost over 1.5 stone in 10 days because I could not find anything to eat. This is also putting a strain on things at home which isn't helping.
I really appreciate everyone who has taken the time to post a reply.
Brian
Brian, i'm not sure you need to see a doctor or that there's anything really wrong at all apart from maybe more freshly cooked food would be better for you than burgers/sausages etc.
So much depends on how we were raised, i was brought up in a fairly poor rural family setting but due to my father being one hell of a pro gardener and my mother able to produce good tasty food from the basics there was always in season vegetables and some form of traditional meat on the table, as such i'm a traditionalist of staple British in my preferences and have no desires otherwise.
Not everyone wants to sample the foods of other cultures and really there's nothing wrong with that, i've tried other foods, Italian is great and my wife's Med food tastes lend to that anyway, but as for spicy foods curries and unusual fish menus quite honestly i'd rather grab some cod n chips from the local chip foundry with lashings of salt n vinegar.
We're not all Grauniad reading foodies and diversity doesn't interest but so far have reached 70 years without requiring umpteen ridiculously overpriced pharma concoctions or medical interventions so must be doing something right.
On that point my suggestion is to avoid the medical profession like the plague, and instead pop into the butchers on the way home grab some pork or lamb or beef and have a bloody good roast with real Yorkshire puds and home made gravy with the meat juices making the basis of it...some sea salt on the pork skin for the worlds best crackling.
So much depends on how we were raised, i was brought up in a fairly poor rural family setting but due to my father being one hell of a pro gardener and my mother able to produce good tasty food from the basics there was always in season vegetables and some form of traditional meat on the table, as such i'm a traditionalist of staple British in my preferences and have no desires otherwise.
Not everyone wants to sample the foods of other cultures and really there's nothing wrong with that, i've tried other foods, Italian is great and my wife's Med food tastes lend to that anyway, but as for spicy foods curries and unusual fish menus quite honestly i'd rather grab some cod n chips from the local chip foundry with lashings of salt n vinegar.
We're not all Grauniad reading foodies and diversity doesn't interest but so far have reached 70 years without requiring umpteen ridiculously overpriced pharma concoctions or medical interventions so must be doing something right.
On that point my suggestion is to avoid the medical profession like the plague, and instead pop into the butchers on the way home grab some pork or lamb or beef and have a bloody good roast with real Yorkshire puds and home made gravy with the meat juices making the basis of it...some sea salt on the pork skin for the worlds best crackling.
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