Carzee / Squirrels
Discussion
Found on Yahoo! news... nowt to do with you is it CarZee...?
LONDON (Reuters) - A squirrel is spreading terror in a Cheshire town where it keeps attacking people.
Its latest victim was a two-year-old girl, newspapers reported on Thursday.
Children have been attacked, grown men chased and residents of Knutsford are fearful of letting their kids out to play, the Times newspaper said.
The rogue squirrel's latest attack was on toddler Kelsi Morley who was bitten on the forehead.
"It was awful because she (Kelsi) was spinnning around and we couldn't get it off," her mother told the newspaper.
"From the amount of blood there was, I thought it had taken Kelsi's eye out."
The squirrel eventually let go and the terrified youngster was rushed to a doctor.
Colin Booty, a senior scientific officer in the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, said it was very unusual for a squirrel to behave like this.
Local resident Blanche Kellye said the problem was not funny. "Everyone round here is living in fear...it's a vicious little thing. I'll never trust squirrels again."
Well it's hardly gonna frigging go out and kidnap one is it
numptymuppetgrandadchap said"He said if it had bitten a child's face this time, what would it do next? He didn't want any more children getting hurt."
Maybe the little fella is working for a very shit terrorist group
Edited cos I've forgot my watch again
>> Edited by moleamol on Thursday 7th November 19:03
It said on the news tonight that the squirrel in question is now deceased (Radio 4, so it must be true!).
What sort of name is Kelsi anyway? That's not a name, it's a random collection of letters. Don't parents realise that their children have to wear these names for their whole lives, and that if they turn out to be ugly or stupid, their name will draw even more attention to the poor sods?
What sort of name is Kelsi anyway? That's not a name, it's a random collection of letters. Don't parents realise that their children have to wear these names for their whole lives, and that if they turn out to be ugly or stupid, their name will draw even more attention to the poor sods?
Perhaps we should remake a low budget JAWS in Knutsford
Plot - random squirrel attack - child bitten
angry "villagers" hunt squirrel down and shoot it.
Carzee compares tooth marks from dead squirrel to bite wounds on child - is convinced they've got the wrong squirrel. A couple of scary moments as carzee runs through darkened woodland - being chased by a large squirrel with "sharp pointy teeth"
Couple of "fake" moments where an air rifling mad irish grandfather who drinks to much whiskey shoots his air rifle into the trees - but only hits birds or rats...
Finally the last confrontation where the Real squirrel attacks carzees tree house style staging platform ... carzee looks to camera ...."we're going to need a bigger tree house ! "
Eventually squirrel attack but accidentally gets a small childs ashthama inhaler lodged in its mouth - the air rifle is lowered ..."smile you sonofabeatch"
BANG ....
>> Edited by Gargamel on Friday 8th November 08:48
Plot - random squirrel attack - child bitten
angry "villagers" hunt squirrel down and shoot it.
Carzee compares tooth marks from dead squirrel to bite wounds on child - is convinced they've got the wrong squirrel. A couple of scary moments as carzee runs through darkened woodland - being chased by a large squirrel with "sharp pointy teeth"
Couple of "fake" moments where an air rifling mad irish grandfather who drinks to much whiskey shoots his air rifle into the trees - but only hits birds or rats...
Finally the last confrontation where the Real squirrel attacks carzees tree house style staging platform ... carzee looks to camera ...."we're going to need a bigger tree house ! "
Eventually squirrel attack but accidentally gets a small childs ashthama inhaler lodged in its mouth - the air rifle is lowered ..."smile you sonofabeatch"
BANG ....
>> Edited by Gargamel on Friday 8th November 08:48
Gargamel said: Perhaps we should remake a low budget JAWS in Knutsford
Plot - random squirrel attack - child bitten
angry "villagers" hunt squirrel down and shoot it.
Carzee compares tooth marks from dead squirrel to bite wounds on child - is convinced they've got the wrong squirrel. A couple of scary moments as carzee runs through darkened woodland - being chased by a large squirrel with "sharp pointy teeth"
Couple of "fake" moments where an air rifling mad irish grandfather who drinks to much whiskey shoots his air rifle into the trees - but only hits birds or rats...
Finally the last confrontation where the Real squirrel attacks carzees tree house style staging platform ... carzee looks to camera ...."we're going to need a bigger tree house ! "
Eventually squirrel attack but accidentally gets a small childs ashthama inhaler lodged in its mouth - the air rifle is lowered ..."smile you sonofabeatch"
BANG ....
![]()
>> Edited by Gargamel on Friday 8th November 08:48
top...
rude girl said: It said on the news tonight that the squirrel in question is now deceased (Radio 4, so it must be true!).
What sort of name is Kelsi anyway? That's not a name, it's a random collection of letters. Don't parents realise that their children have to wear these names for their whole lives, and that if they turn out to be ugly or stupid, their name will draw even more attention to the poor sods?
Maybe the squirrel knew?
Podie said:easy tiger... Mrs Podie heralds from that neck of the woods (well Mobberley actually)... not one to be argued with!
She's from Mobberly.. but I distinctly recall slagging off Knutsford...
Do people in Bristol get upset when you slag the Welsh off then??
edited to say:
bollocks - bring it on, Mrs Podie!!
not one to be argued with!
>> Edited by CarZee on Friday 8th November 09:23
CarZee said:
Podie said:easy tiger... Mrs Podie heralds from that neck of the woods (well Mobberley actually)... not one to be argued with!
![]()
She's from Mobberly.. but I distinctly recall slagging off Knutsford...![]()
She's from Knutsford, but family moved (all of two miles down the road) to Mobberley... geddit?
Gassing Station | General Gassing [Archive] | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff



mode]