limericks

[ocean1]

Im in the mood for posting at the moment, probably because i'm p----d!, anyway here goes

There was a young lady from Harrow
Who thought that her ---- was too narrow
for times without number, she used a cucumber
but could not encompass a marrow.

Regards Ocean1

[judas]

Here's a few for everyone's delight and delectation:

There was a young man of Belgrave
Who kept a dead whore in a cave
He said: "I admit, I'm a bit of a shit"
"But think of the money I save!"

From deep 'neath the crypt of St Giles
Came a scream that re-echoed for miles
The Abbot said: "Gracious! It's Brother Ignatius!"
"He's forgotten the Bishop has piles!"

There was a young man of Devizes
Whose bollocks were both different sizes
One was so small, it was no use at all
While the other had won several prizes

:bored at work:

Edit: cos I can't type

>> Edited by judas on Monday 18th November 17:50

[rocket]

....and.....

There was a young lady called Gwyn
Who had an incredible q**m
It wasn't the size that attracted the flies
But the jelly that hung round the rim

[ocean1]

Love it Judas, come on GF15, I expect at least one from you.

[ocean1]

LOL rocket

[rocket]

The was a Bavarian monk
Who lay awake on his bunk
Whilst staring and Venus he pulled out his p***s
And covered the ceiling in sp**k

[alan_driver]

The Chimera has three different heads,
And she was killed by lots of lead;
Belpheron was brave,
The day that he saved;
Belpheron turned the Chimera red.

[Raskol]

Judas, the dead whore limerick was posted months ago on a thread where someone was describing their experiences as a a driver for an Undertaker. I seem to recall it was the reference to humping corpses which brought the verse to mind!

I rather like this one:

When the Birmingham builders struck
Young Johnny was having a f**k
By Union Rules
He had to down tools
Now, wasn't that f**king bad luck!

[foggy]

There once was a man from Madras,
Who's balls were constructed of brass,
When they jangled together, they played Stormy Weather and lightening shot out of his ar$e.

[judas]

Raskol said: Judas, the dead whore limerick was posted months ago on a thread where someone was describing their experiences as a a driver for an Undertaker. I seem to recall it was the reference to humping corpses which brought the verse to mind!

I first heard that one at least fifteen years ago - so the girl in the cave must be a bit smelly by now

[Gasblaster]

There was a young man from Nantucket
Who's dick was so long he could sucket
He said with a grin
As he stuck out his chin
If my ear was a cnut I could fukket

[dai capp]

there was a young man called McMlean
who invented a w**king machine
on the ninety nineth stroke
the f**king thing broke
and whipped both his bollocks to cream

>> Edited by dai capp on Monday 18th November 20:58

[wedg1e]

'Twas I that posteth re humping corpses....

There was an editor called Ted
Who liked giving a PistonHead
If he recalls 'BARRYMORE'
He'll put up with no more
But delete the whole f*ing thread instead



Ian

[pwig]

wedg1e said: 'Twas I that posteth re humping corpses....

There was an editor called Ted
Who liked giving a PistonHead
If he recalls 'BARRYMORE'
He'll put up with no more
But delete the whole f*ing thread instead



Ian