For those with teenage kids ...
Discussion
My 14yo lad reckons it's OK these days to expect on a Friday and Saturday night to stay up with his mate(s) in his bedroom doing whatever until 2/2.30am - this leads to him getting up at about 1pm the next day (sat or Sun) - I think this is wrong and argue the toss with him at every opportunity but this has happened a few times recently - not every weekend bu certianly two out of the last three and lots of time before. Once I came hom at 3.30am from wiork and he was still up on the computer with his mates.
So, am I being a 1970s fuddy-duddy and being 'tight' as he puts it - and should I come into the 21st century an 'chilll out'? Or should I expect him to toe the line and be more heavy handed.
Basically, am I being unreasonable ...
He's quite small for his age and what he's doing is not beneficial to him physically I think - the staying up late bit - makes him short=tempered sometimes on the Sat/Sun.
But then he is a teenager - may just be normal behaviour
Kids of his age today want to act like 18yo ones, I think and as I said, when you've your own place, you can see the sun come up for all I care.
Any views/experiences appreciated.
So, am I being a 1970s fuddy-duddy and being 'tight' as he puts it - and should I come into the 21st century an 'chilll out'? Or should I expect him to toe the line and be more heavy handed.
Basically, am I being unreasonable ...
He's quite small for his age and what he's doing is not beneficial to him physically I think - the staying up late bit - makes him short=tempered sometimes on the Sat/Sun.
But then he is a teenager - may just be normal behaviour
Kids of his age today want to act like 18yo ones, I think and as I said, when you've your own place, you can see the sun come up for all I care.
Any views/experiences appreciated.
Been there, done that....
I'd rather them staying up late in my house than someone else's - at least you know they are safe and can sort of monitor what they are up to. IMO, 3AM does seem a bit late for 14 year olds though, particularly if they are grouchy the next day. Some would say 14 year olds are often grouchy anyway - remember Kevin the teenager ??
Just wait for the day when he has a girl 'friend' to stay over and you have to try and monitor the sleeping arrangements throughout the night. Happened to us when my lad had his prom date stop over last year (both 15 with hormones going nuclear
). The Mrs never slept a wink that night and insisted on leaving a paper-bin booby trap outside his bedroom door in case nipper tried to sneak into the spare room across the hallway...
I'd rather them staying up late in my house than someone else's - at least you know they are safe and can sort of monitor what they are up to. IMO, 3AM does seem a bit late for 14 year olds though, particularly if they are grouchy the next day. Some would say 14 year olds are often grouchy anyway - remember Kevin the teenager ??
Just wait for the day when he has a girl 'friend' to stay over and you have to try and monitor the sleeping arrangements throughout the night. Happened to us when my lad had his prom date stop over last year (both 15 with hormones going nuclear
). The Mrs never slept a wink that night and insisted on leaving a paper-bin booby trap outside his bedroom door in case nipper tried to sneak into the spare room across the hallway... I have a 15 year old lad Mikey.
I encourage sleepovers as at least I know where they are. They camp in our paddock in the summer as well and I'm fortunate to have large outbuildings where they have sofas, drum kit, music etc.........
I've accepted that staying up all night is part of the buzz and I accept it unless it's a school night or they keep me awake!
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
I encourage sleepovers as at least I know where they are. They camp in our paddock in the summer as well and I'm fortunate to have large outbuildings where they have sofas, drum kit, music etc.........
I've accepted that staying up all night is part of the buzz and I accept it unless it's a school night or they keep me awake!
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
I guess it's a personal thing, depending on your view as a parent - there's no right or wrong with these issues.
Our view with our teenagers is that if they have friends over for a sleep-over then we don't mind them chatting until the wee hours, providing there's no school the next day. However, I don't think we'd allow it every single week. I'd be inclined to draw the line at the 'regularity' rather than the 'lateness'. But, as I say, there's no right or wrong.
Our view with our teenagers is that if they have friends over for a sleep-over then we don't mind them chatting until the wee hours, providing there's no school the next day. However, I don't think we'd allow it every single week. I'd be inclined to draw the line at the 'regularity' rather than the 'lateness'. But, as I say, there's no right or wrong.
unrepentant said:
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
Same here. Understand the bit about knowing where they are - and he says when he satys at their houses, they're up til these sort of times - (have to check that with thier parents really)
So I'm made to feel the odd one out (like I care).
So I'm up against it - probably better to just concede but put a time limit on it - say 1am?
>> Edited by MikeyT on Tuesday 10th January 02:16
MikeyT said:
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
Same here. Understand the bit about knowing where they are - and he says when he satys at their houses, they're up til these sort of times - (have to check that with thier parents really)
So I'm made to feel the odd one out (like I care).
What's worse though is the missus is siding with HIM .. !
So I'm up against it - probably better to just concede but put a time limit on it - say 1am?
Think yourself lucky. I've got an 18 year old daughter as well.
unrepentant said:
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
Same here. Understand the bit about knowing where they are - and he says when he satys at their houses, they're up til these sort of times - (have to check that with thier parents really)
So I'm made to feel the odd one out (like I care).
What's worse though is the missus is siding with HIM .. !
So I'm up against it - probably better to just concede but put a time limit on it - say 1am?
Think yourself lucky. I've got an 18 year old daughter as well.
Need a babysitter...?
wedg1e said:
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
Same here. Understand the bit about knowing where they are - and he says when he satys at their houses, they're up til these sort of times - (have to check that with thier parents really)
So I'm made to feel the odd one out (like I care).
What's worse though is the missus is siding with HIM .. !
So I'm up against it - probably better to just concede but put a time limit on it - say 1am?
Think yourself lucky. I've got an 18 year old daughter as well.
Need a babysitter...?
damn, thats my line
vixpy1 said:
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
Same here. Understand the bit about knowing where they are - and he says when he satys at their houses, they're up til these sort of times - (have to check that with thier parents really)
So I'm made to feel the odd one out (like I care).
What's worse though is the missus is siding with HIM .. !
So I'm up against it - probably better to just concede but put a time limit on it - say 1am?
Think yourself lucky. I've got an 18 year old daughter as well.
Need a babysitter...?
damn, thats my line
Maybe, but I have more experience
wedg1e said:
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
Same here. Understand the bit about knowing where they are - and he says when he satys at their houses, they're up til these sort of times - (have to check that with thier parents really)
So I'm made to feel the odd one out (like I care).
What's worse though is the missus is siding with HIM .. !
So I'm up against it - probably better to just concede but put a time limit on it - say 1am?
Think yourself lucky. I've got an 18 year old daughter as well.
Need a babysitter...?
No
But then I've met you.
wedg1e said:
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
Same here. Understand the bit about knowing where they are - and he says when he satys at their houses, they're up til these sort of times - (have to check that with thier parents really)
So I'm made to feel the odd one out (like I care).
What's worse though is the missus is siding with HIM .. !
So I'm up against it - probably better to just concede but put a time limit on it - say 1am?
Think yourself lucky. I've got an 18 year old daughter as well.
Need a babysitter...?
damn, thats my line
Maybe, but I have more experience
Yes, but all my eqipment still works grandad
MikeyT said:
And they still think I'm a miserable old git..............
Same here. Understand the bit about knowing where they are - and he says when he satys at their houses, they're up til these sort of times - (have to check that with thier parents really)
So I'm made to feel the odd one out (like I care).
What's worse though is the missus is siding with HIM .. !
So I'm up against it - probably better to just concede but put a time limit on it - say 1am?
Even though you and your wife differ on your views here, I hope you show a united front to him?
Anyway, if it were my boy, (I don't have a son, but I do have a 12 year old daughter), I think I'd be inclined to set a time limit - mine would be 12.00 because I need MY sleep and they'd keep me awake, and I wouldn't let his mates stay over more than once a month.
Yes, I am an evil Nazi of a mother, and I don't care what other parents let their kids do. This is mine and Tracksides house, so we make our own rules.
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