Roundabouts.
Author
Discussion

funkihamsta

Original Poster:

1,261 posts

290 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
I am severely phobic of roundabouts as they seem to be designed solely to underline all that is awful with the average driver.
To avoid ever having an accident on one of these l religiously adhere to the following.

1)Alway stick to left lane for 1st and 2nd exits. Otherwise you'll be cut up by a third exit left laner if you try to do the right lane straight on maneouvre.

2)Never assume that a car is leaving the roundabout via the same exit by which you are entering just because it is indicating left. The driver probably has this indicator on at all times to indicate that they will be leaving the roundabout eventually by steering left at some point.

3)In fact never pay any attention to any indicators and assume that any car near you will attempt to drive straight through you if possible.

4)Never assume that a car trying to enter will give way to you as you proceed around the roundabout, even if they are looking straight at you. Instead of this indicating awareness it is in fact some sort of odd animal behaviour as though that occupant were trying to somehow face down a rabid dog. Any eye contact will cause them to immediately launch themselves into your path.

5)Dont ty to utilise the inside lane on the roundabout in parallel with a left laner. Even if they don't turn right on you they will inevitable straighten the bend and push you into the centre island.

6)If in left lane, don't rely on right hand lane view blocking cars pulling out as a signal to go yourself unless they are a coach or an arctic. Even then wait until they have effectively blocked the roundabout right of you completely before moving off.

7)If a roundabout has lights to your right as you enter, do not expect cars on the roundabout to stop at the red. It appears people are only able to grasp the basic give-way rule of roundabouts OR the stop/go of traffic lights but never both at the same time.

8) Check your nearside for any vehicles, especially bikes, as you start to exit. Even if you are indicating, idiots may use any form of transport badly and you may find someone trying to get in your passenger-side window as you turn.

9)Mini-roundabouts. Oddly utilising these correctly can lead to accidents. If you avoid driving straight over the top of them people will assume you are turning left.
For example you wish to turn right and are indicating as such as you enter the mini-roundabout. You nose the car slightly left to avoid treating the mini as though it doesn't exist and as you bring the car round to the right you'll most likely be treated by a wall of someone elses car door as they pull out in front of you. They will then look at you as if you are some kind of lunatic and treat you to several words of their limited vocabulary.

10)Major multi-exit roundabouts. These have no real structure. The people that designed them assume that having lane destinations that require some form of clairvoyance, and demarcations merging several lanes into one in the space of a few meters, is justification for a transport engineers salary.
Best avoided completely unless you have a dodgem car and 360degree unblinking vision.

Brought to you by the Ministry of Circular Safety.

>>> Edited by funkihamsta on Saturday 7th December 13:00

>>> Edited by funkihamsta on Saturday 7th December 17:12

Wedg1e

27,029 posts

292 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
Spot on...... unfortunately!!

Ian

Hut49

3,544 posts

289 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
A veritable masterpiece - now we need to work out how to get the people that need to read this, to read this!

By the way, does anyone have a suggestion as to the appropriate signalling etiquette to alert people on or about to enter a roundabout that the driver of this TVR intends to drift the back-end just a little wide as we circumnavigate. So while it might appear from my wheels that I am trying to make a left turn, I am in fact heading towards exit 3!!

I thought about 4-way flashers and horn

Hutch

deltaf

1,384 posts

284 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
I agree with your analysis completely.
We have several of these new style "take your life in your hands" roundabouts.
The approaches are marked clearly enough, ie, left lane go 1st left or straight on, right lane go straight on or right.
The amount of complete dildobrains that use the left lane to take the 3rd or even 4th (ie right) exits is unimaginable.
Have these trogs got no clue, or do they just not care about lane discipline?
The amount of times these micro IQs drive at others because theyre in the wrong bloody lane defies belief.
Ive had more than a few narrow squeaks with pudding brains like these cutting across in front just as im about to exit.
Of course theres the inevitable 2 fingers shoved up at you for daring to use your horn as a warning to these transgressors, and even on the few occassions that ive followed them to bellow out the window that theyre stupid d*ckheads using the wrong lane, they just have that vacant look on their dumb faces.
Shoot em all i say.....aggggg

campbell

2,500 posts

310 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
Funkihamsta, you should reright the high was code .
But your right on about the uses of round abouts , theres some points ive never thought of while on one, good thinking, I hope your chest is cleared now so you can go and enjoy a good

C

Don

28,378 posts

311 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
I think you forgot the part where it is the duty of every driver of old white Vauxhall Cavaliers to overtake the Porsche on the roundabout by using the left hand lane to get to the third exit.

Having seen the stupendous cornering ability of the vehicle which appears to forgive even the grossest of driving errors (needing to brake whilst travelling at speed around the roundabout to avoid the car that had pulled onto the roundabout not expecting the old white Cavalier to be doing 60mph) I am considering getting rid of my sports cars and purchasing one.

Oh perhaps not then....

P*Ting

5,618 posts

285 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
Nothing wrong with old white cavaliers! *blushes*

levensnevel

245 posts

299 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
How on earth will all those motorists with LH driven cars from the continent survive those dreadfull UK roundabouts I wonder ?
Or can we hire such a white Vauxhall Cavalier at Dover or Harwhich ?
Go with the flow I guess

Levensnevel

RCA

1,769 posts

295 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
I'm with you on that one Hutch!!!!

Cotty

42,145 posts

311 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
I had a little of 4) this afternoon. Typical I dont care if your already on the roundabout im coming through . I nailed the throttle and the dozy mare just missed the rear on my car.

angua

17 posts

283 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all
not so much the old white cavalier, so much as the old gits who grip the steering wheels with whitened knuckles, lock the elbows and proceed to drive across the roundabout from the left lane and trying to 'skim the centre with their off side tyres ( these 'old gits'often have other old gits with them whose sole function is look at you (trying to disappear into nowhere and fast) as if you comitted THE crime of the century whilst the driver resolutely refuses to look at all. and they say euthenasia is debatable !

nonegreen

7,803 posts

297 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all

Hut49 said: A veritable masterpiece - now we need to work out how to get the people that need to read this, to read this!

By the way, does anyone have a suggestion as to the appropriate signalling etiquette to alert people on or about to enter a roundabout that the driver of this TVR intends to drift the back-end just a little wide as we circumnavigate. So while it might appear from my wheels that I am trying to make a left turn, I am in fact heading towards exit 3!!

I thought about 4-way flashers and horn

Hutch



having considered your problem carefully and indeed tried to apply a bit of lateral thinking. I fear you may be locked into conventional means of signalling. May I humbly suggest a flamethrower fitted to nearside, aimed at about 10 degrees to the left. Yep that should do the trick.

littlegearl

3,139 posts

284 months

Saturday 7th December 2002
quotequote all

4)Never assume that a car trying to enter will give way to you as you proceed around the roundabout, even if they are looking straight at you. Instead of this indicating awareness it is in fact some sort of odd animal behaviour as though that occupant were trying to somehow face down a rabid dog. Any eye contact will cause them to immediately launch themselves into your path.


if they remotely look like they're gonna pull out point at them and make eye contact, and as you go round the roundabout keep your finger pointing at them so it kinda arcs across the windscreen... i do this often and so far it has had a 100% success rate for people not pulling out and i haven't even recieved any repriseals which you get if you mash the horn at them, which is my other option...

...as i always enter the roundabouts around my way with my hand on the horn ready to blast* anyone that cuts me up, or pulls out in front of me...

*and not a short blast either, over 20 seconds generally gets the message across...

i'd also like to add although i'm not the best driver out there roundabouts are a problem with me as i ALWAYS do 'em right and get VERY pissed off with people that can't

i even accept that if i'm in the wrong lane its my fault and i will find my way out with out cutting anyone up or causing accidents!!!

Farmer

1,287 posts

301 months

Sunday 8th December 2002
quotequote all
Fact.
Numpties don't understand roundabouts , all your points are true , but you missed out the rule that states . when aproaching a roundabout never look to your right to see if the way is clear untill you have stopped at the line and aplied your handbrake !then you wait untill a half chance appears before engaging second gear releasing the handbrake and lurching forward, though not necessarily proceeding onto the roundabout ! this greatly improves traffic flow don't you just love em ?

wedg1e

27,029 posts

292 months

Sunday 8th December 2002
quotequote all
Aye, well as a seasoned campaigner about the highways (read: old bugger), I can categorically state that driving standards in this country have gone 'right down the sh1tter'. And I'm not just talking roundabouts. Though I may be talking bollards...

I passed my test 21 years ago and do well over 30K miles a year (just in one van, that's without the hire cars, vans and my own TVR). NEVER a trip goes by, whether it's 2 miles to/from work, 'Boro to Leeds or Esbjerg to Calais, that I don't want to get out and punch some sense into some person (I'm trying to avoid words like dildo, d*ckhead, sh*t-for-brains, w*nker, kn*bhead, t*sser, pr*t, *rsehole, wit, kn*bstick, c*ckbrain, c*nt, clo*n or l*natic ;-) who perpetrates some act that, whilst on the face of it a trifling offence compared to genocide or being an MP, still does not conform to those basic principles of driving that, let's face it, we all have to demonstrate a grasp of in order to obtain a driving license.
SO WHY THE HELL CAN'T THEY CONFORM???? Is it so bloody difficult to lift ONE FINGER to fire the indicators? Are the rules of roundabouts REALLY so hard to grasp?
God's teeth.
We'd all be able to forgive those that trespass in our windscreen if they got the bulk of it right, but no: they can't even do the simple things. I've said it before, but I'm beginning to think the only way is to give in and join them: every man for himself, survival of the fastest and all that.

Right, where's the rest of that bottle of brandy....?



Ian

scruffy

3,757 posts

288 months

Sunday 8th December 2002
quotequote all


...as i always enter the roundabouts around my way with my hand on the horn ready to blast* anyone that cuts me up, or pulls out in front of me...

*and not a short blast either, over 20 seconds generally gets the message across...

i'd also like to add although i'm not the best driver out there




Every fcuker on the road is a stupid waste of DNA, sorry but you have to look at it that way otherwize you'll never get to your destination. You'll forgive the slighty err... jaded view i have at the mo..

littlegearl

3,139 posts

284 months

Sunday 8th December 2002
quotequote all
the other trick is not to drive an old car, me and my bro both drive cars ranging from 24 (mine) to 30 (bro's) and the amount of time people pull out because it has a backwars number plate (eg: XXX 999 X) but they fail to realise that i'm going at speed and not some old fool who bought this car in 1970ish and is still driving it...

they do the same on all roads, so they pull out of side junctions on A roads then realise your doing 90, luckly both me and my brother have both uprated our brakes on our cars!!! good job too!

the only good thing with old cars is you get more "respect" (no rude-boy style) when driving in busy areas, if you point you car at a gap and accelerate, they get out your (my) way!!!

gnomesmith

2,458 posts

303 months

Sunday 8th December 2002
quotequote all

angua said: not so much the old white cavalier, so much as the old gits who grip the steering wheels with whitened knuckles, lock the elbows and proceed to drive across the roundabout from the left lane and trying to 'skim the centre with their off side tyres ( these 'old gits'often have other old gits with them whose sole function is look at you (trying to disappear into nowhere and fast) as if you comitted THE crime of the century whilst the driver resolutely refuses to look at all. and they say euthenasia is debatable !


Strangely from my observation it is mainly young gits...its all a matter of perspective.

granville

18,764 posts

288 months

Sunday 8th December 2002
quotequote all
Chaps, I suspect one of the probs may arise from the 'approach speeds' involved?

Whilst being the last person to condone the trilby/rear-facing baseball cap inspired techniques referred to above, I think it pertinent to take account of the sheer differentials 'twixt your Tiv and uncle Albert's Micra or Gaz & Shaz's XR3...

This doesn't apply to blatant, general lane indiscipline but can explain - if not excuse - some of the 'near scrape' situations that can be encountered.

E.g. This morning, as I frapped up a duel c-way, a Volvo estate pulled out forcing a bit of frantic brake work. I didn't get upset, neither did he and that was nice for a change(!) but it did illustrate the 'unexpected' nature of how the rear view speck can sometimes snuffle along faster than many people are simply used to.

Tiv owners & co must all get this and at the end of the day, the lesson has to be, treat everyone as a potential Dihatsu Charade driver.

Slayer

58 posts

283 months

Sunday 8th December 2002
quotequote all


9)Mini-roundabouts. Oddly utilising these correctly can lead to accidents. If you avoid driving straight over the top of them people will assume you are turning left.
For example you wish to turn right and are indicating as such as you enter the mini-roundabout. You nose the car slightly left to avoid treating the mini as though it doesn't exist and as you bring the car round to the right you'll most likely be treated by a wall of someone elses car door as they pull out in front of you. They will then look at you as if you are some kind of lunatic and treat you to several words of their limited vocabulary.


All mini-roundabouts of the painted variety should be treated as though they don't exist. They are the work of the Devil