Discussion
Im not a violent person, just a regular guy, the decent sort I like to think. Im not even one of those types who seems to attract violence or problems but I had a bit of an incident today.
Its to do with business. Basically, some people wanted something to happen. I wont go into details, but there was a problem which was not really my fault. I even gave them a resolution to the problem, which was implemented for free.
These guys are proper wide boys. They drove for hours today to have a 10 minute meeting. I couldnt understand their urgent need to meet me, until they arrived. When they arrived, the shouting started, following which they threw me against a wall, hit me, threatened to break bones... I dont doubt their threats, Im sure one of them would do a stretch inside if they felt I needed to be sorted out 'their way' The one guy (who did the hitting/throwing around) was holding the other one back at the end of the meeting. I wont pretend I wasnt scared, because I was
Its left me feeling sick, empty, my mind flooded with those things rape victims say/describe after the attack, the feeling of having had their personal space totally violated
My home doesnt feel safe. It doesnt even feel like my home anymore. Its awful. I dare not go to the police because I know I would end up with a lot more problems, It would only make things a lot worse.
What scares me though, is the problem wasnt really my fault, and was rectified, with no loss of business or anything like that. If anything went wrong (things I cant control) they could be back at the door again. Every time a car pulls up outside I think what if its them
This really sucks 
What would you do? I sound like a bloody girl dont I 
Its to do with business. Basically, some people wanted something to happen. I wont go into details, but there was a problem which was not really my fault. I even gave them a resolution to the problem, which was implemented for free.
These guys are proper wide boys. They drove for hours today to have a 10 minute meeting. I couldnt understand their urgent need to meet me, until they arrived. When they arrived, the shouting started, following which they threw me against a wall, hit me, threatened to break bones... I dont doubt their threats, Im sure one of them would do a stretch inside if they felt I needed to be sorted out 'their way' The one guy (who did the hitting/throwing around) was holding the other one back at the end of the meeting. I wont pretend I wasnt scared, because I was
Its left me feeling sick, empty, my mind flooded with those things rape victims say/describe after the attack, the feeling of having had their personal space totally violated
My home doesnt feel safe. It doesnt even feel like my home anymore. Its awful. I dare not go to the police because I know I would end up with a lot more problems, It would only make things a lot worse. What scares me though, is the problem wasnt really my fault, and was rectified, with no loss of business or anything like that. If anything went wrong (things I cant control) they could be back at the door again. Every time a car pulls up outside I think what if its them
This really sucks What would you do? I sound like a bloody girl dont I 
UKBob said:
I sound like a bloody girl dont I
No you don't mate! I would have been, and still would be, petrified!
I really can't offer much advice - personally I'd be making sure their thing (website?) was sorted and in A1 shape so the likelyhood of anything else happening to you is remote, then think about ways the contract can be bought to a natural, amicable, end.
Involving the police sounds like it wouldn't be a sensible option, although I'd be sure to tell a friend everything in case anything else (god forbid) did happen.
do you run your business from home? Perhaps in the future it might be best to use a meeting room (you can hire them out at hotels and serviced offices) for meeting new clients?
I really would be feeling sick right now - so don't feel bad if you do. Macho bullshit is for the movies.
Where are you based - I'll buy you a pint or 3 if you are in London and fancy bending someone's ear.
Sorry to hear that Rob. I can't believe the web business has these louts. As mentioned, get some cctv installed in case you need it. You did the right thing to get away pretty much unscathed - the world sadly has these kinds of people.
Also, it might be worth doing a real-world martial art, if only to give yourself more psychological strength in these situations. I practise Wing Chun Kung Fu, with this school: www.kamonwingchun.com (they also have a class in Horsham). I have never used it and hope I never will need to. But I can walk down Bridge Street in Guildford with confidence at night.
Also, it might be worth doing a real-world martial art, if only to give yourself more psychological strength in these situations. I practise Wing Chun Kung Fu, with this school: www.kamonwingchun.com (they also have a class in Horsham). I have never used it and hope I never will need to. But I can walk down Bridge Street in Guildford with confidence at night.
"I dare not go to the police because I know I would end up with a lot more problems"
i get the impression your business with these chaps might not be quite to the letter of the law itself - in that case all you can do is drop them as clients as soon as possible and chalk it up to bad luck. if your business with them stays in order, they probably wont come back - a quick scare might have been all they wanted
i get the impression your business with these chaps might not be quite to the letter of the law itself - in that case all you can do is drop them as clients as soon as possible and chalk it up to bad luck. if your business with them stays in order, they probably wont come back - a quick scare might have been all they wanted
paulhol said:
"I dare not go to the police because I know I would end up with a lot more problems"
i get the impression your business with these chaps might not be quite to the letter of the law itself - in that case all you can do is drop them as clients as soon as possible and chalk it up to bad luck. if your business with them stays in order, they probably wont come back - a quick scare might have been all they wanted
I think he means that he knows plod would go round and have a word with the thugs which would mean they would come back and have another word with UKbob for 'grassing' on them.
What kind of business are they in?
Blimey mate, that's awful.
No-one deserves this, not you or any of their other victims who they do business with. This isn't the stone ages, personally I would inform the police - but then it's not me or my business involved in this nasty situation.
Whatever you do I hope you can get over it OK & maybe consider not doing business with the arseholes again.
No-one deserves this, not you or any of their other victims who they do business with. This isn't the stone ages, personally I would inform the police - but then it's not me or my business involved in this nasty situation.
Whatever you do I hope you can get over it OK & maybe consider not doing business with the arseholes again.
...sometimes crazy sh** lands right on your doorstep....I feel that moments like these can be good for toughening up! Imagine these louts were at your door and your wife/kids were inside....We all have a responsibility to protect ourselves. There are some violent people about. Confidence in your self is a valuable lesson and will make you a stronger person.GET ANGRY not dismayed....Best wishes.
Francis
Francis
F##k me Rob, it all happens to you!! (I seem to remember typing that once before on one of your threads!!)
Its obviously a very dangerous game this website buisness!! For what its worth they are obviously scum, it goes without saying that everyone will feel mass empathy for you. AT THE VERY LEAST you should get a CCTV thing installed. Also, write everything down, its amazing how quickly you forget little details when trying to recount an incident some time later.
There has to be a case for going to the bib now, but only you can be the judge of that.
Chin up mate and regards,
Martin.
Its obviously a very dangerous game this website buisness!! For what its worth they are obviously scum, it goes without saying that everyone will feel mass empathy for you. AT THE VERY LEAST you should get a CCTV thing installed. Also, write everything down, its amazing how quickly you forget little details when trying to recount an incident some time later.
There has to be a case for going to the bib now, but only you can be the judge of that.
Chin up mate and regards,
Martin.
bob, mate, get some friends over, now. do something normal. you need to re-establish your boundaries and you're cool. people around you will do this. order up some grub, drink some beers, watch a movie.
what you're going through is a process, now you're shocked later you'll feel angry. let it run its course, accept that its okay to feel rubbish. then don't think about it any more. you've said all you need to say and you've thought on it all you need to. you did nothing wrong, don't look for reasons for idiots to behave as idiots, you wont find any. you haven't failed anybody. you havent failed yourself. you shouldnt have done something else. you arent weak.
ill come over if you like mate. or you can call. whatever you need chum.
edited to add: if i were you, i wouldnt add cctv or anything like that, right now itll only make you more conscious of how vulnerable you feel: as if you need to do something cos you cant fend for yourself. you can. but, you cant win them all. just sit, be cool, cry, fell shaky, but indulge. ok?
trust me, i live in a place where bad people are trained to be as such. they wont feel they need to do it again, cos theyve got the 'power' that they were looking for. let them have it, dont kick against it. youve not had anything taken from you. if they are due to come back, mail me. happy to help.
>> Edited by nervous on Friday 20th January 19:11
what you're going through is a process, now you're shocked later you'll feel angry. let it run its course, accept that its okay to feel rubbish. then don't think about it any more. you've said all you need to say and you've thought on it all you need to. you did nothing wrong, don't look for reasons for idiots to behave as idiots, you wont find any. you haven't failed anybody. you havent failed yourself. you shouldnt have done something else. you arent weak.
ill come over if you like mate. or you can call. whatever you need chum.
edited to add: if i were you, i wouldnt add cctv or anything like that, right now itll only make you more conscious of how vulnerable you feel: as if you need to do something cos you cant fend for yourself. you can. but, you cant win them all. just sit, be cool, cry, fell shaky, but indulge. ok?
trust me, i live in a place where bad people are trained to be as such. they wont feel they need to do it again, cos theyve got the 'power' that they were looking for. let them have it, dont kick against it. youve not had anything taken from you. if they are due to come back, mail me. happy to help.
>> Edited by nervous on Friday 20th January 19:11
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