Actual calls taken by a HelpDesk!!!
Discussion
Heard by a computer help desk, any sound familiar??
______
A customer couldn't get on the Internet:
Helpdesk: "Are you sure you used the right password?"
Customer: "Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it."
Helpdesk: "Can you tell me what the password was?"
Customer: "Five stars."
______
Helpdesk: "What kind of computer do you have?"
Customer: "A white one."
______
Customer: "Hi, this is Rose. I can't get my diskette out."
Helpdesk: "Have you tried pushing the button?"
Customer: "Yes, sure, it's really stuck."
Helpdesk: "That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note."
Customer: "No... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... Sorry..."
______
Helpdesk: "Click on the 'My Computer' icon on to the left of the screen."
Customer: "Your left or my left?"
______
Helpdesk: "Good day. How may I help you?"
Male customer: "Hello, I can't print."
Helpdesk: "Would you click on start for me and..."
Customer: "Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, you know!"
______
Customer: "Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says, 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can't find it."
______
Customer: "I have problems printing in red."
Helpdesk: "Do you have a colour printer?"
Customer: "Aaaah... Thank you."
______
Customer: "My keyboard is not working anymore."
Helpdesk: "Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?"
Customer: "No. I can't get behind the computer."
Helpdesk: "Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back."
Customer: "Okay."
Helpdesk: "Did the keyboard come with you?"
Customer: "Yes."
Helpdesk: "That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?"
Customer: "Yes, there's another one here. Ahh, that one works!"
______
Helpdesk: "Your password is the small letter 'a' as in apple, a capital letter 'V' as in Victor, and the number '7'."
Customer: "Is that '7' in capital letters?"
______
Helpdesk: "What anti-virus program do you use?"
Customer: "Netscape."
Helpdesk: "That's not an anti-virus program."
Customer: "Oh, sorry... Internet Explorer."
______
Customer: "I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!"
______
Helpdesk: "How may I help you?"
Customer: "I'm writing my first e-mail."
Helpdesk: "Okay, and what seems to be the problem?"
Customer: "Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?"
______
A customer couldn't get on the Internet:
Helpdesk: "Are you sure you used the right password?"
Customer: "Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it."
Helpdesk: "Can you tell me what the password was?"
Customer: "Five stars."
______
Helpdesk: "What kind of computer do you have?"
Customer: "A white one."
______
Customer: "Hi, this is Rose. I can't get my diskette out."
Helpdesk: "Have you tried pushing the button?"
Customer: "Yes, sure, it's really stuck."
Helpdesk: "That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note."
Customer: "No... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... Sorry..."
______
Helpdesk: "Click on the 'My Computer' icon on to the left of the screen."
Customer: "Your left or my left?"
______
Helpdesk: "Good day. How may I help you?"
Male customer: "Hello, I can't print."
Helpdesk: "Would you click on start for me and..."
Customer: "Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, you know!"
______
Customer: "Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says, 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can't find it."
______
Customer: "I have problems printing in red."
Helpdesk: "Do you have a colour printer?"
Customer: "Aaaah... Thank you."
______
Customer: "My keyboard is not working anymore."
Helpdesk: "Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?"
Customer: "No. I can't get behind the computer."
Helpdesk: "Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back."
Customer: "Okay."
Helpdesk: "Did the keyboard come with you?"
Customer: "Yes."
Helpdesk: "That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?"
Customer: "Yes, there's another one here. Ahh, that one works!"
______
Helpdesk: "Your password is the small letter 'a' as in apple, a capital letter 'V' as in Victor, and the number '7'."
Customer: "Is that '7' in capital letters?"
______
Helpdesk: "What anti-virus program do you use?"
Customer: "Netscape."
Helpdesk: "That's not an anti-virus program."
Customer: "Oh, sorry... Internet Explorer."
______
Customer: "I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!"
______
Helpdesk: "How may I help you?"
Customer: "I'm writing my first e-mail."
Helpdesk: "Okay, and what seems to be the problem?"
Customer: "Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?"
Haven't seen them before!sadako said:
I had a user who managed to raise a priority 1 call (normally reserved for an entire site down, many users affected type errors) because she couldnt open a document. Turns out she was trying to open a .jpg win word.
reminds me of someone i worked with. she had to urgently open and review file that a client had emailed her and kicked up a huge stink over the phone to the IT guys because her computer hadn't been set up properly...
...Turns out she'd deleted the .pdf file extension when she saved it to the server!
Nick P said:
Heard by a computer help desk, any sound familiar??
______
Helpdesk: "Good day. How may I help you?"
Male customer: "Hello, I can't print."
Helpdesk: "Would you click on start for me and..."
Customer: "Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates, you know!"
______
Oh, I get plenty of these sorts of calls. They either complain or sigh really loudly when you ask them to click on something... Either that, or they act like they've never used a computer before as soon as you ask them to do something.
Users are stupid!
My favourite when taking help desk calls from British Airways about ten years ago, was this little gem...
Customer: My screen size is too small and I cannot read the menu's.
Me: Ok I want you to right-click anywhere on the open space on the desktop.
Customer: Ok.
Me: Now from the menu select Properties...
Customer: From where?
Me: from the menu.
Customer: What menu?
Me: From the one you have in front of you.
Customer: I don't have a menu in front of me.
Me: Ok, start again...(so we repeat the above) ...and select Properties from the menu..
Customer: There is no menu.
Me: There must be, please tell me exactly what you have done since we started this..
Customer: "I wrote 'right-click' on the desktop - with a pencil! There is no menu!"
at this point the customer was put on hold, I told the rest of my colleagues around me to listen up, then asked the customer to repeat the answer while they were put on the speakerphone. I heard a faint wimper over the phone which was drowned out as the office proceded to fall about in hysterics.
Customer: My screen size is too small and I cannot read the menu's.
Me: Ok I want you to right-click anywhere on the open space on the desktop.
Customer: Ok.
Me: Now from the menu select Properties...
Customer: From where?
Me: from the menu.
Customer: What menu?
Me: From the one you have in front of you.
Customer: I don't have a menu in front of me.
Me: Ok, start again...(so we repeat the above) ...and select Properties from the menu..
Customer: There is no menu.
Me: There must be, please tell me exactly what you have done since we started this..
Customer: "I wrote 'right-click' on the desktop - with a pencil! There is no menu!"
at this point the customer was put on hold, I told the rest of my colleagues around me to listen up, then asked the customer to repeat the answer while they were put on the speakerphone. I heard a faint wimper over the phone which was drowned out as the office proceded to fall about in hysterics.
Not call centre related, but while working at Asda, I happened to be stood next to the customer service desk, we had just had a partial revamp, and so were used to people having a go at us for moving stuff.
So, snobby lady comes upto the desk, and proceeds to complain, she wanted to know if there was any particular reason why we had now placed the throat lozenges next to the condoms.
At this point I walked away trying my best not to laugh, and left the girl at the desk to it!
So, snobby lady comes upto the desk, and proceeds to complain, she wanted to know if there was any particular reason why we had now placed the throat lozenges next to the condoms.
At this point I walked away trying my best not to laugh, and left the girl at the desk to it!
Very funny!
I work in an IT department and quite a few years ago now we had an irate user who blew her top as her computer hadsn't been fixed for a few weeks. We enquired as to whom she had reported the fault to, she replied 'No one, I just kept pressing the 'help' key expecting someone to turn up'!
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