How to make a complete dick of yourself...

[l33]

HOW TO MAKE A COPLETE DICK OF YOURSELF:
Lesson 1 - Make sure your wedging just before 3pm.
Lesson 2 - Stop at a junction where all the local "Yummy Mummys" are congregating.
Lesson 3 - Attempt to boot the car from the junction, dump the clutch too quickly stall said wedge.
Lesson 4 - to make sure you succeed, your battery must be flat and fail to restart car.


Yes, that was me yesterday. What a dick I must have looked. My ego deserted me and I was left there in the middle of the road looking a little red-faced

I knew the battery was not good but when it failed to restart, I was not a happy bunny. I even contemplated selling up as I couldn't take the shame.

Anyway, new battery (Type 072) purchased this morning and after realising it was a very tight fit to get it in, I had to shout the obligatory words , tt, and Wanker. These words when shouted loud enough always help.
Wedge all fixed and working again
Just need to find a different group of Yummy Mummys now...

>> Edited by l33 on Thursday 25th May 14:59

[rev-erend]

There is a technique with the battery .. guess you know this now

[chassis 33]

Sounds like just punishment for arsing about around a school TBH

Regards
Iain

[l33]

chassis 33 said:

Sounds like just punishment for arsing about around a school TBH Regards Iain

I agree officer. I would never even speed when theres kids coming out of a school but about 14:45 just before the schools finish and theres no kids around - just yummy mummys, I can justify to myself.

[chassis 33]

Except for the toddlers coming with yummy mummy to collect elder sprog, the mindless ymummy mummies inanely gabbing way to eachother as they cross the road to the school gates, the GSCE and A-level students just coming out of their exams and thier minds still focused on question three of the medieval history paper, no real dangers I guess.

Regards
Iain

[likesbikes]

HOW TO MAKE A COMPLETE DICK OF YOURSELF:

Go boy racing outside a school, then highlight it by posting your story on the internet on a site that gets enough bad press about speeding as it is while trying to make a case for the appropriate use of speed.

[l33]

likesbikes said:

HOW TO MAKE A COMPLETE DICK OF YOURSELF: Go boy racing outside a school, then highlight it by posting your story on the internet on a site that gets enough bad press about speeding as it is while trying to make a case for the appropriate use of speed.

Or get a motorbike and dress up like a power-ranger

[grahamw48]

Ayup....handbags !!!

Mine's misfiring like bu**ery higher up the revs when she's hot...bit like a limiter, but too low down.

Must get sorted. I think she's running rich.

[matt-man]

hahaha, power ranger indeed!

[grahamw48]

Umhum - just found LOOSE connecter to + side of coil.

That's got to be worth 50bhp

Don't mind me ....I'm just pottering about here.

[firefox1712]

I don't think I've ever come across any yummy mummys whose heads can be turned by a TVR or other desirable car (if there are any).

I live right by a high school (so teenagers) and it is downright dangerous when the school run is on - morning and afternoon. Added to which there are plenty of lunatics that roar along the road at breakneck speed, mainly in the evenings and at weekends when the youths gather outside the school, and the youngsters on motorbikes try their best to impress the rest.

I have to say, I have spotted one or two yummy mummys, but not many.

[grahamw48]

I think it should be residents only (with badge) within quarter of a mile of schools.

These lazy people are a damned nuisance !

My boy walks a mile and a half to school, and the same back each day, and it only does him good.

[combine]

I thought you were happily married Lee ? Whats with those Mummys ?

[selmer]

combine said:

I thought you were happily married Lee ? Whats with those Mummys ?

Didn't you read the story? They're YUMMY!!!! I do this too occasionally, not the flooring it bit, but just trying to look cool......




















never works for me either.

[l33]

combine said:

I thought you were happily married Lee ? Whats with those Mummys ?

I'm not married - I just call her wifey. As for the Yummy Mummys, I just can't help myself. Its an adiction - just like wedges

[jamesk]

Hehe. Gotta love stalling it with an audience

Ignore the hippies making obvious remarks about school safety by the way. Internet guardians are by far the most irritating.

[grahamw48]

Well young Iain DOES have far too much hair







.







...I'm jealous.

[chassis 33]

jamesk said:

Hehe. Gotta love stalling it with an audience Ignore the hippies making obvious remarks about school safety by the way. Internet guardians are by far the most irritating.

If it's so fecking obvious that you don't do it why is Lee, by all accounts and contact i've had with him a gent with his head screwed on, doing it? By all means go hoon/play where the risk of injry to yourself and 3rd parties is minimised, but not by a school.

Don't put me down when you don't know me.

ETA...the hair is coming off soon, due to new business interests, investers prefer someone a little more clean cut than stig of the dump to hand their money over to...bugger
Regards
Iain

>> Edited by chassis 33 on Thursday 25th May 22:57

[badredwedge]

If you drive a big Wedge you really dont have to show off by laying rubber around the place, just the fact you are sitting in it and the unrestricted, none strangled, easy breathing V8 is sucking in small dogs and birds is enough, Yummy Mummys would be more impressed if you show your more considerete side. IMO
However if you drive a more understated car, big rep mobile for example, and need to prove your a big boy and it aint a 518 with a set of badges then ............ I hope I aint on the Zebra crossing or my daughter or my wife or yours come to think of it.

Wish I had long hair again.... Wish I had hair

[chassis 33]

I could make some money from this...who want to buy my hair???

Regards
Iain