How to handle scrotes?
Discussion
Hot on the heels of the attack on me and Gipsy (my pup, for those who may not have seen the recent thread) I now have a new problem involving local scrotes that I need to deal with. I live in a cul de sac and there is a car parking area in front of the house. A group of scrotes has taken to parking their scrotemobiles outside my house during the day and playing their scrotey "music" at ridiculous volumes. I work from home.
I'm wondering if I should ask them very politely if they wouldn't mind going elsewhere or, at the very least turning the music down (can't imagine I'll get a very positive reaction to that!), go ou with a pitching wedge and suggest in more colourful terms that they decamp...or else, or try to get B.I.B to take notice (which I suspect they won't).
Bearing in mind that High Wycombe appears to have been turned into a haven of scrote-ism, I suppose the real answer is, yet again, to sell up and stop trying to play Canute. But I worked bloody hard to buy this house for very good reasons and can't see why I should feel forced out.
How would you handle the situation?
I'm wondering if I should ask them very politely if they wouldn't mind going elsewhere or, at the very least turning the music down (can't imagine I'll get a very positive reaction to that!), go ou with a pitching wedge and suggest in more colourful terms that they decamp...or else, or try to get B.I.B to take notice (which I suspect they won't).
Bearing in mind that High Wycombe appears to have been turned into a haven of scrote-ism, I suppose the real answer is, yet again, to sell up and stop trying to play Canute. But I worked bloody hard to buy this house for very good reasons and can't see why I should feel forced out.
How would you handle the situation?
I'm sure if you phone the police station with this complaint and point out that you're already in regular correspondance with the C.I., they'll be responsive... quite how useful they'll be I don't know but I suspect they can use these new laws we were all moaning about to confiscate scrote's car - which would be marvellously entertaining 
Play "I will always love you" by Whitney Houston (theme from the Bodyguard) at very high volume....they'll soon go.
Failing that leaving your bin bags out as soon as you can (making sure they have festered well in the sun and smell really bad)....they will be able to smell the stench even over their own BO and not hang around. If it doesn't work you'll be able to claim lots of lost cat rewards as every cat from 5 miles will be outside your house
Failing that leaving your bin bags out as soon as you can (making sure they have festered well in the sun and smell really bad)....they will be able to smell the stench even over their own BO and not hang around. If it doesn't work you'll be able to claim lots of lost cat rewards as every cat from 5 miles will be outside your house
d3ano said: Whats a Scrote?
A scrote is similar to a scally, a scally is:
Scallies - We all know some. You may not call them Scallies - townies is another name commonly attributed to them - but they exist everywhere. Scallies are those kids who don't like school; they don't go as often as possible, and when they do, they spend their time in the back of the classroom, messing about, disrupting the lesson for everyone.
Scallies can usually be differentiated fromt he rest of the population by what they wear, their speech, and, if they are over 13, the amount of children they have. They wear designer labels all the time; it is their uniform. If they aren't walking advertising hoardings for all the top labels, then they are usually not Scallies. They all smoke, having usually started just after birth.
All Scally males (I'm using this term loosely) have shaved heads, and, usually, one stud earring. They are also extremely homophobic. In fact, they seem to think that calling someone or something that they don't like 'gay' is the way to go. Mind you, Scallies have a vocabulary of slightly less words than your average shellfish, so it's not all that surprising. If you so much as insinuate that one may be a homosexual, they immediately attempt to beat you up (and invariably fail miserably, since they are usually weaklings). Such behaviour leads me to deduce that they are extremely repressed, and do not embrace their true sexuality. This is backed up by their facade of 'being hard'.
Scally females (again, I'm using the term loosely) are usually bleach-blondes. They usually wear sour expressions, and far too much makeup. Also, certainally in England, they all seem to wear gaudy gold oval-hoop earrings.The term 'slut' doesn't begin to describe how loose most of these girls are. They also do not understand the theory of 'contraception', hence Scallies are the fastest-growing section of the community.
Scallies do not have much of a vocabulary, as stated above, but they can often be identified by those words they do use. Examples of such 'words' are "yo", "booyaka-sha", "innit", "phat" and such. They also aspire to copy black culture, albeit very badly. For example the phrase "booyaka-sha" has been put forward to translate as "Death to white people" in one African dialect. They also listen to Rap and R&B music, and also pop music, which is, to my ears, inexcuable.
I beleive that the reason that Scallies behave as they do is because they will never aspire to anything, and they recognise this fact. Most Scallies would be lucky to be employed by McDonalds, which is where most of them eke out a pitiful wage, which is wasted on cigarettes and either alcopops, cider, or bad lager. This realisation is also the source of their anger and frustration, which is what leads them to attempt to injure those cleverer or better than themselves.
Unfortunately, as stated above, due to their complete lack of understanding of the concept of contraception, Scallies are the fastest-growing section of the population. It is also a well-known fact that children end up as images of their parents. hence, the Scallies are breeding more Scallies, and so on, in an ever-increasing downward spiral - the proportion of Scallies in the population is growing exponentially, with no sign of slowing. And it is little wonder that their offspring end up as they do. Their parents beat, threaten and swear at them, as well as giving them no encouragement to do well in life. As such, they have no hopes or aspirations other than where the next cigarette is coming from, and end up as templated of their parents; bitter, angry, fruatrated and stupid. This new generation of Scallies start breeding from the age of 13, and so will their children, and their children, and so on.
Is there a solution to the ever-growing Scally eperdemic? Although it may not solve the problem, I feel that complete and world-wide banning of R&B, Pop music, designer labels, cigarettes and cider would at least serve to make me feel better. ALso, some form of from-birth contraception, that can only be reversed when the parents-to-be meet a set of criteria, would also help stem the flow, although that will not happen so long as we do not live in an (outwardly) 'Big Brother' state. Scallies are a nuisance. In the wild, nuisances are culled to keep their number in check. Unfortunately, a large cull of Scallies is not an option. The only way we can at least hope to stem the tide of Scallies is to not become them ourselves, and to teach our children how to do something with their lives. To let our children fall into Scallydom is to ruin their lives.
To be a Scally is to lead a pointless existence.
Bodo said: Why not bring the scrotes on the racists and vice versa. That'll be self purification; two flies with one stone, an independent system (small Darwin-Experiment)
By saying they are a different race, your saying they are different from yourself, racist in its self.
Get as many tvr's/lotus etc sitting outside making as much noise as possible, drowning out there boom boom tunes and making there nova/corsas looking crap to all the asociated 15 year old girls. Maybe follow/combine that with the "Whitney Houston Technique".
Only problem might then be getting rid of the 15 yr olds looking for a sh4g in the back seat afterwards.......
>> Edited by pistol pete on Friday 11th April 12:46
Only problem might then be getting rid of the 15 yr olds looking for a sh4g in the back seat afterwards.......
>> Edited by pistol pete on Friday 11th April 12:46
alan_driver said:
Bodo said: Why not bring the scrotes on the racists and vice versa. That'll be self purification; two flies with one stone, an independent system (small Darwin-Experiment)
By saying they are a different race, your saying they are different from yourself, racist in its self.
Who is a different race?
Have they picked your house specifically or is it coincidence?
I had a word with a scrote the other day who was acting suspiciously. He had a legit explanation and was embarressed that I'd bothered to speak to him.
His lack of communication skills was shocking though. He could barely string together any stream of sense out of his stubbly boat.
I had a word with a scrote the other day who was acting suspiciously. He had a legit explanation and was embarressed that I'd bothered to speak to him.
His lack of communication skills was shocking though. He could barely string together any stream of sense out of his stubbly boat.
PetrolTed said: Have they picked your house specifically or is it coincidence?
I live in a terrace, so it isn't that they are particularly picking on me. They've obviously just decided that this is a good place to get together. The only other neighbour who is in during the day is an elderly lady who is totally mutt, so they won't be bothering her! They haven't committed a crime, they are just being very loud with their dodgy music and bean-can exhausts. I'm probably a bit over sensitive following recent events, but it is very irritating!
There were a couple of scrotes that had taken to driving past my house (on a 30mph country lane)at high speed in their OTT Peugot things.
I simply walked out in front of the first car one day, he braked hard and stopped and then wound his window down. I shouted at him and threatned to tear his head off if he did it again, my dog was going mad by my side, he argued back , I shouted louder (I have two small children and dont want them run over) and then suggested that he stopped squeaking and f'd off. His mate behind looked more scared than he did. They were both embarassed and drove off sheepishly. Havent seen them again.
I could have ignored - then it continues
I could have been polite - no way would that of worked.
I went for the ploy of go OTT and make em think you are mental - some risk (ie they could be friends with some dodgey people) but effective.
I simply walked out in front of the first car one day, he braked hard and stopped and then wound his window down. I shouted at him and threatned to tear his head off if he did it again, my dog was going mad by my side, he argued back , I shouted louder (I have two small children and dont want them run over) and then suggested that he stopped squeaking and f'd off. His mate behind looked more scared than he did. They were both embarassed and drove off sheepishly. Havent seen them again.
I could have ignored - then it continues
I could have been polite - no way would that of worked.
I went for the ploy of go OTT and make em think you are mental - some risk (ie they could be friends with some dodgey people) but effective.
As said above,
Try phoning the cops and claim i)Drugs ii)Guns are being sold/flashed about.
Failing that, try using the paedo-paranoia and report them for stalking the young children on the cul-de-sac.
Failing that ask them if they want to come in your garden shed and see your puppies. Make sure you wear an old tank top over a grey shirt, and give yourself a severe greased side-parting. Apologies if this is actually how you dress
>> Edited by Swilly on Friday 11th April 13:11
Try phoning the cops and claim i)Drugs ii)Guns are being sold/flashed about.
Failing that, try using the paedo-paranoia and report them for stalking the young children on the cul-de-sac.
Failing that ask them if they want to come in your garden shed and see your puppies. Make sure you wear an old tank top over a grey shirt, and give yourself a severe greased side-parting.
Apologies if this is actually how you dress >> Edited by Swilly on Friday 11th April 13:11
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