535D faster than Concorde?
Discussion
Well not exactly but I am still in shock at what happened this weekend.
1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph I proceeded to tell the missus what a great car it was. I explained that much as I would like one, it would be wasted on us as I get my speed thrills from my Exige (330bhp) and my R1 and therefore our little old 535d would just be fine for the new baby and rolling up and down motorways. I was secretly hoping he would boot it just so I could witness the car in full force. Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well
So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.
2. Later in the weekend an Impreza P1 with dustbin size exhaust overtakes me on the motorway and just for a giggle I decide to see how fast he is. Again as he boots it he pulls away but nothing huge and I just slowly retract from his rear. I am so shocked that I still can't believe it as we repeat the same thing a few more times. Even the poor souls in their beanies are looking aghast as a damn diesel sits on their tail. Finally when his balls break I give him a 150mph fly past.
So despite never believing that a 535d was that fast I have to express sincere shock at what turned out to be an extraordinary weekend. Off the lights it is shite slow and top end it seems a bit breathless but in the middle it really does seem quite nippy. God knows what a DMS one must be like.
PS It also worries me that my old 997S while fast would probably also have been made to look less mad than I thought when I drove it.
1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph I proceeded to tell the missus what a great car it was. I explained that much as I would like one, it would be wasted on us as I get my speed thrills from my Exige (330bhp) and my R1 and therefore our little old 535d would just be fine for the new baby and rolling up and down motorways. I was secretly hoping he would boot it just so I could witness the car in full force. Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well
So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.2. Later in the weekend an Impreza P1 with dustbin size exhaust overtakes me on the motorway and just for a giggle I decide to see how fast he is. Again as he boots it he pulls away but nothing huge and I just slowly retract from his rear. I am so shocked that I still can't believe it as we repeat the same thing a few more times. Even the poor souls in their beanies are looking aghast as a damn diesel sits on their tail. Finally when his balls break I give him a 150mph fly past.
So despite never believing that a 535d was that fast I have to express sincere shock at what turned out to be an extraordinary weekend. Off the lights it is shite slow and top end it seems a bit breathless but in the middle it really does seem quite nippy. God knows what a DMS one must be like.
PS It also worries me that my old 997S while fast would probably also have been made to look less mad than I thought when I drove it.
jjr1 said:
Well not exactly but I am still in shock at what happened this weekend.
1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph I proceeded to tell the missus what a great car it was. I explained that much as I would like one, it would be wasted on us as I get my speed thrills from my Exige (330bhp) and my R1 and therefore our little old 535d would just be fine for the new baby and rolling up and down motorways. I was secretly hoping he would boot it just so I could witness the car in full force. Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.
2. Later in the weekend an Impreza P1 with dustbin size exhaust overtakes me on the motorway and just for a giggle I decide to see how fast he is. Again as he boots it he pulls away but nothing huge and I just slowly retract from his rear. I am so shocked that I still can't believe it as we repeat the same thing a few more times. Even the poor souls in their beanies are looking aghast as a damn diesel sits on their tail. Finally when his balls break I give him a 150mph fly past.
So despite never believing that a 535d was that fast I have to express sincere shock at what turned out to be an extraordinary weekend. Off the lights it is shite slow and top end it seems a bit breathless but in the middle it really does seem quite nippy. God knows what a DMS one must be like.
PS It also worries me that my old 997S while fast would probably also have been made to look less mad than I thought when I drove it.
Put it up against your turbo Elise and see how it does 1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph I proceeded to tell the missus what a great car it was. I explained that much as I would like one, it would be wasted on us as I get my speed thrills from my Exige (330bhp) and my R1 and therefore our little old 535d would just be fine for the new baby and rolling up and down motorways. I was secretly hoping he would boot it just so I could witness the car in full force. Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well
So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.2. Later in the weekend an Impreza P1 with dustbin size exhaust overtakes me on the motorway and just for a giggle I decide to see how fast he is. Again as he boots it he pulls away but nothing huge and I just slowly retract from his rear. I am so shocked that I still can't believe it as we repeat the same thing a few more times. Even the poor souls in their beanies are looking aghast as a damn diesel sits on their tail. Finally when his balls break I give him a 150mph fly past.
So despite never believing that a 535d was that fast I have to express sincere shock at what turned out to be an extraordinary weekend. Off the lights it is shite slow and top end it seems a bit breathless but in the middle it really does seem quite nippy. God knows what a DMS one must be like.
PS It also worries me that my old 997S while fast would probably also have been made to look less mad than I thought when I drove it.
Shropshiremike said:
jjr1 said:
Well not exactly but I am still in shock at what happened this weekend.
1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph I proceeded to tell the missus what a great car it was. I explained that much as I would like one, it would be wasted on us as I get my speed thrills from my Exige (330bhp) and my R1 and therefore our little old 535d would just be fine for the new baby and rolling up and down motorways. I was secretly hoping he would boot it just so I could witness the car in full force. Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.
2. Later in the weekend an Impreza P1 with dustbin size exhaust overtakes me on the motorway and just for a giggle I decide to see how fast he is. Again as he boots it he pulls away but nothing huge and I just slowly retract from his rear. I am so shocked that I still can't believe it as we repeat the same thing a few more times. Even the poor souls in their beanies are looking aghast as a damn diesel sits on their tail. Finally when his balls break I give him a 150mph fly past.
So despite never believing that a 535d was that fast I have to express sincere shock at what turned out to be an extraordinary weekend. Off the lights it is shite slow and top end it seems a bit breathless but in the middle it really does seem quite nippy. God knows what a DMS one must be like.
PS It also worries me that my old 997S while fast would probably also have been made to look less mad than I thought when I drove it.
Put it up against your turbo Elise and see how it does 1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph I proceeded to tell the missus what a great car it was. I explained that much as I would like one, it would be wasted on us as I get my speed thrills from my Exige (330bhp) and my R1 and therefore our little old 535d would just be fine for the new baby and rolling up and down motorways. I was secretly hoping he would boot it just so I could witness the car in full force. Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well
So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.2. Later in the weekend an Impreza P1 with dustbin size exhaust overtakes me on the motorway and just for a giggle I decide to see how fast he is. Again as he boots it he pulls away but nothing huge and I just slowly retract from his rear. I am so shocked that I still can't believe it as we repeat the same thing a few more times. Even the poor souls in their beanies are looking aghast as a damn diesel sits on their tail. Finally when his balls break I give him a 150mph fly past.
So despite never believing that a 535d was that fast I have to express sincere shock at what turned out to be an extraordinary weekend. Off the lights it is shite slow and top end it seems a bit breathless but in the middle it really does seem quite nippy. God knows what a DMS one must be like.
PS It also worries me that my old 997S while fast would probably also have been made to look less mad than I thought when I drove it.
Admittedly that would be a done deal but try and get my Elise to carry 4 people and see how the table turns
The 535d is not a slow car. By all means its no M5. Either that car is a fake or he didnt try..
An E60 M5 will do 0-100 in under 10 secs. A 535d in 14.5 secs.
The standing quarter the M5 will do a low 12 second pass at OVER 116MPH. The 535d a low 14 at just under the ton. The M5 WILL chase a 360/GALLARDO all the way to 200 and will pass the 4wd lambo.
My stock 335d made 310bhp on the rollers and has done a 13.9@102mph on the strip, she is capable of a mid 13 stock and an m5 has left me standing. A e39 m5 is a different kettle of fish and i can live with them.
An E60 M5 will do 0-100 in under 10 secs. A 535d in 14.5 secs.
The standing quarter the M5 will do a low 12 second pass at OVER 116MPH. The 535d a low 14 at just under the ton. The M5 WILL chase a 360/GALLARDO all the way to 200 and will pass the 4wd lambo.
My stock 335d made 310bhp on the rollers and has done a 13.9@102mph on the strip, she is capable of a mid 13 stock and an m5 has left me standing. A e39 m5 is a different kettle of fish and i can live with them.
jjr1 said:
1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph . Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.
2. Later in the weekend an Impreza P1 with dustbin size exhaust overtakes me on the motorway and just for a giggle I decide to see how fast he is. Again as he boots it he pulls away but nothing huge and I just slowly retract from his rear. I am so shocked that I still can't believe it as we repeat the same thing a few more times. Even the poor souls in their beanies are looking aghast as a damn diesel sits on their tail. Finally when his balls break I give him a 150mph fly past.
.
So the M5 driver didnt like you sitting on his bumper and tried to get a bit of distance, then realising you were trying to race him in a inferior car decided to let you past So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.2. Later in the weekend an Impreza P1 with dustbin size exhaust overtakes me on the motorway and just for a giggle I decide to see how fast he is. Again as he boots it he pulls away but nothing huge and I just slowly retract from his rear. I am so shocked that I still can't believe it as we repeat the same thing a few more times. Even the poor souls in their beanies are looking aghast as a damn diesel sits on their tail. Finally when his balls break I give him a 150mph fly past.
.
Its not that he had no balls it just he used his brain instead
as for the "150mph flypast" is that the most sensible thing to do on the average british road
If you check out the 50-70 times of an m5 compared to a 535d you can see why our friend may have been able to keep up. No doubt some m5 fans will bleat that the m5 in the right gear will be quicker than the times quoted in car mags but there are a lot of m5 drivers who will just plant it and hope for the best.
Couple that with a DMS remap....
Besides, an M5 is built to be fast, and you a very heavy premium for that. How much more fun is it to be up the arse of someone in a big diesel saloon car? Particularly given its just 2/3rds the price....
Couple that with a DMS remap....
Besides, an M5 is built to be fast, and you a very heavy premium for that. How much more fun is it to be up the arse of someone in a big diesel saloon car? Particularly given its just 2/3rds the price....
''1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph I proceeded to tell the missus what a great car it was. I explained that much as I would like one, it would be wasted on us as I get my speed thrills from my Exige (330bhp) and my R1 and therefore our little old 535d would just be fine for the new baby and rolling up and down motorways. I was secretly hoping he would boot it just so I could witness the car in full force. Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.''
Suggest if you have a baby or one on the way that you do a bit of growing up and fast. Hope I and my family dont meet you on the road when you've lost control driving like a tw@t
Suggest if you have a baby or one on the way that you do a bit of growing up and fast. Hope I and my family dont meet you on the road when you've lost control driving like a tw@t
Baldinho said:
''1. Came up behind a V10 M5 and while rolling along at 50mph I proceeded to tell the missus what a great car it was. I explained that much as I would like one, it would be wasted on us as I get my speed thrills from my Exige (330bhp) and my R1 and therefore our little old 535d would just be fine for the new baby and rolling up and down motorways. I was secretly hoping he would boot it just so I could witness the car in full force. Strangely he must have decided that the annoying 5 series behind him needed a can of whoop arse as well So suddenly all hell broke loose and his engine roared and off he went. Now here is the strange part because I was still behind him as he came up to a long wet corner and I was easily able to hold onto his tale as he had not developed any balls as yet. Back onto the straight and up to 110mph I just slowly retracted but not embarassingly so. To say I was shocked would be an understatement ! Later on the A453 our hero had obviously got a massive dressing down from his missus as he missed loads of overtaking chances and I just sailed past him.''
Suggest if you have a baby or one on the way that you do a bit of growing up and fast. Hope I and my family dont meet you on the road when you've lost control driving like a tw@t
Oh get over yourself. The M5 driver went between a lorry and oncoming traffic by the skin of his teeth while showing me how fast he was. All my overtakes after that were a paragon of virtue and did not endanger anyone. As for a 150mph flypast that was on the Subaru and since he was doing a good 140mph, who cares?Suggest if you have a baby or one on the way that you do a bit of growing up and fast. Hope I and my family dont meet you on the road when you've lost control driving like a tw@t
As for an M5 leaving a 535d from standing or at very high speeds I have absolutely no doubt. I just found it weird that at say 50mph to 100mph he could not pull a decent gap.
Having said that I once had a Golf R32 on a motorway follow me in my 997S and he didn't exactly dissapear in a cloud of smoke every time I booted it.
I guess at these mid range speeds there can be less in it than you imagine.
I'd suggest the M5 wasn't in P500 mode to be honest... I've had a stock 535D give me a run in P400 mode but press that button and most things disappear rapidly from the mirrors!
And to be fair, the 535D was bmwdrivernigel and he can drive any BMW very very fast indeed!
ETA: to the OP; it's also probably not a good idea to admit driving at the speed you mentioned on a public forum...
And to be fair, the 535D was bmwdrivernigel and he can drive any BMW very very fast indeed!
ETA: to the OP; it's also probably not a good idea to admit driving at the speed you mentioned on a public forum...
Edited by john_r on Wednesday 16th January 10:56
pgilc1 said:
If you check out the 50-70 times of an m5 compared to a 535d you can see why our friend may have been able to keep up. No doubt some m5 fans will bleat that the m5 in the right gear will be quicker than the times quoted in car mags but there are a lot of m5 drivers who will just plant it and hope for the best.
Couple that with a DMS remap....
Besides, an M5 is built to be fast, and you a very heavy premium for that. How much more fun is it to be up the arse of someone in a big diesel saloon car? Particularly given its just 2/3rds the price....
The 50 - 70mph times are in kickdown with the 535. And 6th for the M5.Couple that with a DMS remap....
Besides, an M5 is built to be fast, and you a very heavy premium for that. How much more fun is it to be up the arse of someone in a big diesel saloon car? Particularly given its just 2/3rds the price....
john_r said:
I'd suggest the M5 wasn't in P500 mode to be honest... I've had a stock 535D give me a run in P400 mode but press that button and most things disappear rapidly from the mirrors!
And to be fair, the 535D was bmwdrivernigel and he can drive any BMW very very fast indeed!
ETA: to the OP; it's also probably not a good idea to admit driving at the speed you mentioned on a public forum...
And to be fair, the 535D was bmwdrivernigel and he can drive any BMW very very fast indeed!
ETA: to the OP; it's also probably not a good idea to admit driving at the speed you mentioned on a public forum...
Edited by john_r on Wednesday 16th January 10:56
:535dman said:
I can say for sure that the M5 you "raced" was a replica and not the real deal. There are plenty around nowadays and to be honest it would be someone with a replica trying to prove he's got a real m5
Someone with the real M5 wouldnt bother racing anyone IMHO
This was a real one on a very impressive private plate and it was not hard to hear how real it was as he dropped through the gears. Exactlty the same sound as my M3 used to make when I needed to open it up.Someone with the real M5 wouldnt bother racing anyone IMHO
Someone with a real M5 would not race? What the
does that mean? I used to race anyone who fancied it in my 997S and many a Ferrari driver has taken me on while on my bike. To be fair its probably the mechanics at Graypaul Fair point by someone above though about it being in 400bhp mode as clearly I have no idea if it was or not.
If you're sure it was a real M5 the guy don't deserve to be driving it! Could well be in 400bhp mode.
I've got a Hartge tuned 535d and trust me it's a rocket but I still give the M5 respect where it's due V10 510BHP 
Go get yours dms'd / hartge'd and you'll be even more suprised at what this b*tch can do
I've got a Hartge tuned 535d and trust me it's a rocket but I still give the M5 respect where it's due
V10 510BHP Go get yours dms'd / hartge'd and you'll be even more suprised at what this b*tch can do
I would get it tuned but as it is not exactly fun on B roads I am not sure I can be bothered to try and hustle it. I use my other bike and car for trackdays and generally the 535 is just a bus to carry me up and down the motorway.
How much was the Hartge tune?
How much was the Hartge tune?
Edited by jjr1 on Wednesday 16th January 11:57
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