Workplace Toilets

[JamesZS]

I've just gone to take a dump at work, walked into the cubicle and found one of them to be totally blocked with poo and bog roll, and the other has turd smeared around the toilet seat!

I work in an office, yet it constantly seems like a Secondary School with the amount of urine, excrement and public hair that is constantly lacing the seats of the crappers!

Amusing suggestions as to how to get people to stop this practice would be fantastic.

dons Flame-proof suit and waits for 'gayer' related comments or similar

[Thudd]

It's no better here, but the worst place I worked we had a "hoverer" who often missed.
We narrowed it down by a spot of detective work (ie "it was ok when I was last in") and were pretty sure who the culprit was.

Then they made him redundant.

Problem stopped.

[Lois22]

JamesZS said:

public hair

Well it's there for everyone's use.

[mitzy]

The ladies is awful here, god knows how they leave there lavvy's at home!

Mind you the cleaning is no better!

[Stang]

JamesZS said:

I've just gone to take a dump at work, walked into the cubicle and found one of them to be totally blocked with poo and bog roll, and the other has turd smeared around the toilet seat!

I work in an office, yet it constantly seems like a Secondary School with the amount of urine, excrement and public hair that is constantly lacing the seats of the crappers!

Amusing suggestions as to how to get people to stop this practice would be fantastic.

dons Flame-proof suit and waits for 'gayer' related comments or similar

That's nothing. You want to try working offshore.

[thewave]

I hate unclean toilets with a passion.

I'm like stbreak off American Pie, spreading little sheets of bog roll around the seat.

Needless to say, immodium has been my best friend at festivals

Toilets here at work are spotless though.

[Timmy33]

I've been thinking of making a similar post. Can anyone explain why people fill the bog with paper and leave it. Totally stuffed full of paper, sometimes with a turd on top but usually not.

Maybe someone has done it on here? Or knows someone who has....I'm genuinely mystyfied. I mean WTF is the point in doing it?

[Neil_H]

JamesZS said:

I've just gone to take a dump at work, walked into the cubicle and found one of them to be totally blocked with poo and bog roll, and the other has turd smeared around the toilet seat!

I work in an office, yet it constantly seems like a Secondary School with the amount of urine, excrement and public hair that is constantly lacing the seats of the crappers!

Amusing suggestions as to how to get people to stop this practice would be fantastic.

dons Flame-proof suit and waits for 'gayer' related comments or similar

Exactly the same at my work place and at my previous places as well, 2 investment banks and one hedge fund, supposedly staffed by intelligent mature individuals, and traders. I can only wonder what kind of state their homes are in.

Luckily they are always cleaned several times a day so all one needs to do is wait it out until the cleaner has visited.

[Timmy33]

Neil_H said:

Exactly the same at my work place and at my previous places as well, 2 investment banks and one hedge fund, supposedly staffed by intelligent mature individuals, and traders.

Oh christ the 'dawn' chorus of 'cr*pping flatulence' to be heard in any city office is absolutely staggering. It's worse than the bean feast sound effects in 'Blazing saddles' in there some mornings.

[rhinochopig]

Stang said:

JamesZS said:

I've just gone to take a dump at work, walked into the cubicle and found one of them to be totally blocked with poo and bog roll, and the other has turd smeared around the toilet seat!

I work in an office, yet it constantly seems like a Secondary School with the amount of urine, excrement and public hair that is constantly lacing the seats of the crappers!

Amusing suggestions as to how to get people to stop this practice would be fantastic.

dons Flame-proof suit and waits for 'gayer' related comments or similar

That's nothing. You want to try working offshore.

Or with ex-forces. 'Twas them that introduced me to the Skidmark competition

[PhilLL]

I pi55ed in one of our toilets the other day; unfortunately no-one told me it was disconnected and awaiting draining while they start the toilet refurb

[Puggit]

So today I'm sitting in one of 6 stalls in our toilet block - the others are all empty. Someone took the time and effort to walk down to my cubicle, the furthest from the door, and tried to get in to my cubicle quite forcefully.

Why...?

[im]

Use they ladies - it's usually clean with a pleasant aroma - and they usually have a machine with weird looking cotton buds in individual wrappers...

[Timmy33]

im said:

Use they ladies - it's usually clean with a pleasant aroma - and they usually have a machine with weird looking cotton buds in individual wrappers...

Better bet is to go in the disabled ones. Much more roomy.

[anonymous-user]

JamesZS said:

I've just gone to take a dump at work, walked into the cubicle and found one of them to be totally blocked with poo and bog roll, and the other has turd smeared around the toilet seat!

I work in an office, yet it constantly seems like a Secondary School with the amount of urine, excrement and public hair that is constantly lacing the seats of the crappers!

Amusing suggestions as to how to get people to stop this practice would be fantastic.

dons Flame-proof suit and waits for 'gayer' related comments or similar

Do you work in my office?

[Thudd]

Puggit said:

So today I'm sitting in one of 6 stalls in our toilet block - the others are all empty. Someone took the time and effort to walk down to my cubicle, the furthest from the door, and tried to get in to my cubicle quite forcefully.

Why...?

They wanted your body?

I'm using the toilets at the other end of the office this week as our toilet smells a lot like a rat is trapped in the boxing around the sink and gently decomposing.

[KingRichard]

im said:

Use they ladies - it's usually clean with a pleasant aroma - and they usually have a machine with weird looking cotton buds in individual wrappers...

Tears are rolling down my cheeks

[Thudd]

The disabled toilets has a funny shaped seat, and opens directly onto the corridor so anyone passing can hear what you're passing.

As for the ladies - if any "ladies" actually work in your office, it's likely to be worse than the gents. They're like animals. It's not right.

[Chilli]

Thudd said:

The disabled toilets has a funny shaped seat, and opens directly onto the corridor so anyone passing can hear what you're passing.

As for the ladies - if any "ladies" actually work in your office, it's likely to be worse than the gents. They're like animals. It's not right.

Hmmm, always concerned that I'll press some linda button and the door will fling open and a bunch of first aid do-gooders will be there looking at me.

Wait till you get home.

[ajcj]

Go in during the morning rush hour with a small grapefruit or large orange (Seville are good), lock the door and wait until most other traps are full. Then start grunting and audibly straining, gradually increasing the volume until you sound as though you are in some pain. Then take the fruit and drop it into the pan from a height of several feet, accompanied by a deeply relieved groan.

After flushing, stagger out and wash hands, wincing slightly.

Helps pass the time.