The truth about Aggie MacKenzie!
The truth about Aggie MacKenzie!
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Kiltie

Original Poster:

7,505 posts

269 months

Sunday 24th August 2008
quotequote all
My mum's cleaning lady was recently in the same railway carriage as Aggie MacKenzie. She (Aggie) made a rude comment under her breath as she was getting her case down from the overhead rack. The cleaning lady (let's call her Mrs X) is currently attempting to engage the services of a biker gang to "teach Aggie a lesson".

Also, my sister's boyfriend's cousin went to school with Colin and Justin (of interior decorating programme fame). Justin is a really cool guy but, apparently, it is suspected that Colin ... shall we say ... bowls from the pavillion end.

While we're at it, I overheard a bloke in the pub tonight saying that Carol Smillie has one false leg (the right one I think).

Cheers,

Eric smile

Malx

871 posts

227 months

Sunday 24th August 2008
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I am intrigued by your ideas and wish to subscribe to your newsletter



just realised who Agie MacKenzie is and why a cleaning lady might fall out with her, i'll get my coat and not post after 11pm


Edited by Malx on Sunday 24th August 00:38

Kiltie

Original Poster:

7,505 posts

269 months

Sunday 24th August 2008
quotequote all
My post is a jab at a person or persons who contribute to this forum and feel the need to demonstrate connections with celebrities and then express strong opinions regarding those individuals.

wink

VetteG

3,236 posts

267 months

Sunday 24th August 2008
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Kiltie's been on the pop again!nuts

G

Kiltie

Original Poster:

7,505 posts

269 months

Sunday 24th August 2008
quotequote all
... ya don't say ... biggrin

Believe me, it was hilarious last night. wink

Cheers,

Eric smile

Corpulent Tosser

5,468 posts

268 months

Sunday 24th August 2008
quotequote all
Kiltie said:
While we're at it, I overheard a bloke in the pub tonight saying that Carol Smillie has one false leg (the right one I think).

Cheers,

Eric smile
Strangely though, both her feet are real confused


anonymous-user

77 months

Sunday 24th August 2008
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Kiltie said:
While we're at it, I overheard a bloke in the pub tonight saying that Carol Smillie has one false leg (the right one I think).
Now this IS true, my ex girlfriends sister used to walk her dog in the same park as Ms Smillie, said dog never liked her on wheel of fortune (Jenny Powell is much better looking) so cocked his leg and peed on Smillie's right leg whilst she was distracted by her dog chasing John Leslie's Bichon Frise, she didn't flinch, why, cos she didn't feel it!

71notout

3,674 posts

260 months

Monday 25th August 2008
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I heard the reason for Miss Smilie's perma-smile is because the prosthetic limb tickles her stump!

steve996

1,240 posts

238 months

Friday 29th August 2008
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Kiltie - I think I was following you home tonight on the south deeside road in your Exige, bizzarly I recognised your number plate from this website having clicked through your profile ages ago.....bizzare the things that you remember!

Very sensibly driven sir, I kinda thought you might tramp on a bit, just as well we didn't though with the BIB sitting on the big straight. I was in my Grey pork also being unusually sensible!

Kiltie

Original Poster:

7,505 posts

269 months

Friday 29th August 2008
quotequote all
Indeed, I saw you behind me.

I had been at Ardoe all day and mid afternoon, I heard a number of bikes nipping on as they passed by.

Sunny Friday afternoon, there was a good chance they were going to be there.

Then, I don't know if you noticed, some kind soul gave us a flash as we approached the long Durris straight.

A bike had passed me earlier just before the Mill Inn. I wondered if it was he who was being chatted to as we passed.

Aye, I'd have loved a spirited run out the road ... but six points doesn't half focus the mind.

I'm sure we'll come across each other sometime soon (I'm in Crathes).

ETA ... I was just rewinding the journey in my head. When we got the the Slug Road, there was a truck coming over the bridge and indicating to turn right onto the Feugh Bridge road. I wasn't convinced he meant what he was indicating so held back emerging from the junction. In retrospect, I guess that resulted in you being behind him - sorry. Hopefullly you got an opportunity to get past lickity-split.

Cheers,

Eric smile

Edited by Kiltie on Friday 29th August 23:16

Kiltie

Original Poster:

7,505 posts

269 months

Friday 29th August 2008
quotequote all
Anyway, back on topic.

The wife's sister was on holiday in Los Cristianos (Tenerife) recently and got speaking to a couple who'd been in Monaco the year before.

While there, they'd become really good friends with David Coulthard's gardener's two asisstants - Jérôme and Serge. The four of them liked to enjoy an afternoon spliff together on Mondays and Thursdays.

Anyway, these two Frenchies reckon DC can't drive worth a fukc and he's known, now and again, to hang around the pissoir on Casino Square for unhealthy periods of time.

Now, I'd always thought the big chinned Red Bull driver was a bit useful behind the wheel - but how wrong I was.

So there you go, he's nae a bonny boy, he's a useless racing driver and, even more worrying, he may be a willie watcher.

You heard it here first!

Cheers,

Eric smile

steve996

1,240 posts

238 months

Saturday 30th August 2008
quotequote all
Kiltie said:
Indeed, I saw you behind me.

I had been at Ardoe all day and mid afternoon, I heard a number of bikes nipping on as they passed by.

Sunny Friday afternoon, there was a good chance they were going to be there.

Then, I don't know if you noticed, some kind soul gave us a flash as we approached the long Durris straight.

A bike had passed me earlier just before the Mill Inn. I wondered if it was he who was being chatted to as we passed.

Aye, I'd have loved a spirited run out the road ... but six points doesn't half focus the mind.

I'm sure we'll come across each other sometime soon (I'm in Crathes).

ETA ... I was just rewinding the journey in my head. When we got the the Slug Road, there was a truck coming over the bridge and indicating to turn right onto the Feugh Bridge road. I wasn't convinced he meant what he was indicating so held back emerging from the junction. In retrospect, I guess that resulted in you being behind him - sorry. Hopefullly you got an opportunity to get past lickity-split.

Cheers,

Eric smile

Edited by Kiltie on Friday 29th August 23:16
Yup no worries on that score, the truck was despatched fairly quickly, didn't get much free reign though, an inspirationally well driven Nissan Almera was awaiting me a few bends later and then the road works in Banchory.... smile

Kiltie

Original Poster:

7,505 posts

269 months

Saturday 30th August 2008
quotequote all
Jeez - off topic again! madwink

Anyway, Jensen Button (or, as the Frenchies call him, Yensen Bootone) once spent a night in Aberdeen on some Honda corporate junket.

He was staying at the Copthorne and they went out for dinner at Pappy Yokums IIRC (or, it may have been Radar's).

Anyway, Yensen got separated from his minders late on when they were all completely blootered and off their faces on magic mushrooms.

The poor lad became disoriented and walked in completely the wrong direction. He ended up in the St Clement's just about last orders. He struck up a conversation with a couple of ladies; Sniffy Ivy and Fool Annie. The story is that they struck a deal, skulled another couple of vodies and then retired to the grave yard across the road for a ménage à trois.

Now, a bloke I was at school with is desk sergeant at Lodge Walk. I don't want to say his name but he's a member at Craibstone. Anyway, Jim told me that both Sniffy Ivy and Fool Annie were detained a few days later as part of a zero tolerance initiative to prevent Torry minkers invading the city.

During interview, Ivy revealed some interesting facts regarding our Jens. Apparently he is an extremely talented racing driver but the car Honda keep giving him is just a pile of old shat.

He also has very sensitive skin and can't shave very often.

Cheers,

Eric smile

renmure

4,803 posts

247 months

Saturday 30th August 2008
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... Time for bed Eric said Zebedee... smile

Mr Willie

Original Poster:

7,505 posts

269 months

Wednesday 1st September 2010
quotequote all
This is the best PH post ever.

renmure

4,803 posts

247 months

Wednesday 1st September 2010
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Mr Willie said:
This is the best PH post ever.
What on earth were you searching for that ended up here??

Kiltie

Original Poster:

7,505 posts

269 months

Thursday 2nd September 2010
quotequote all
renmure said:
Mr Willie said:
This is the best PH post ever.
What on earth were you searching for that ended up here??
Clickage. Keep up Jim FFS. wink

BTW, next time I'm down your way, I'd really like to see your dogs if that's ok.

Cheers,

Eric smile



renmure

4,803 posts

247 months

Thursday 2nd September 2010
quotequote all
Kiltie said:
BTW, next time I'm down your way, I'd really like to see your dogs if that's ok.

Cheers,

Eric smile
Always welcome Eric.
I will tell Chas to come along and provide the Entertainment smile