Things that kids say...
Discussion
We had a chap from the Salvation Army knock on our door tonight - apparently they'd left an envelope for us to fill up with tenners! Anyway, I went searching for said envelope (plus 50p) while my youngest daughter engaged him in conversation. As I got back to the front door, with coin in envelope, I heard him saying "no, no, we don't do that". "Don't do what?", I asked. "Drop bombs on the terrorists", he replied. To which we both laughed!
It got me thinking about the things that kids say when they're young. Years ago, when my eldest was about five, he knew he shouldn't jump up and down on the bed. However, one day we discovered one of the wooden slats had busted and I called him in to see if he could explain it. Clearly he had been waiting for for this encounter and he said: "Well, I was lying in bed when I suddenly got this really bad growing pain and I started to get bigger and bigger and heavier and heavier and the bed broke". I then asked him how he got small again and he replied "it happened in my dream but it was definitely real".
It got me thinking about the things that kids say when they're young. Years ago, when my eldest was about five, he knew he shouldn't jump up and down on the bed. However, one day we discovered one of the wooden slats had busted and I called him in to see if he could explain it. Clearly he had been waiting for for this encounter and he said: "Well, I was lying in bed when I suddenly got this really bad growing pain and I started to get bigger and bigger and heavier and heavier and the bed broke". I then asked him how he got small again and he replied "it happened in my dream but it was definitely real".
k off you old bsrebbe64 said:
It got me thinking about the things that kids say when they're young. Years ago, when my eldest was about five, he knew he shouldn't jump up and down on the bed. However, one day we discovered one of the wooden slats had busted and I called him in to see if he could explain it. Clearly he had been waiting for for this encounter and he said: "Well, I was lying in bed when I suddenly got this really bad growing pain and I started to get bigger and bigger and heavier and heavier and the bed broke". I then asked him how he got small again and he replied "it happened in my dream but it was definitely real".
I still have this problem from time to time 
My friend wheeled her son to the local shop. She is friendly with the security guard and left little Dean with him while she did a quick run-a-round.
Then the Pussycat Dolls song came on the Radio...
"..Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me...."
Dean started singing at the top of his lungs:
"Don't you wish your girlfriend was my mammy....!"
Security guard was on the floor laughing.
Then the Pussycat Dolls song came on the Radio...
"..Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me...."
Dean started singing at the top of his lungs:
"Don't you wish your girlfriend was my mammy....!"
Security guard was on the floor laughing.
The eldest Flintstonette was two years old and riding up the escalator with Wilma. At that time a certain television programme hosted by a couple of terribly english women was in vogue.
A few steps ahead of them rode a pair of fairly wide arses attached to bodies nominally female prompting the young one to yell "Look Mum!! Two Fat Ladies!!"
A few steps ahead of them rode a pair of fairly wide arses attached to bodies nominally female prompting the young one to yell "Look Mum!! Two Fat Ladies!!"
I was maybe 4 when someone from my Dads work phoned for him who was most surprised to hear 'he can't come to the telephone because he is in the toilet having a poo'.
I was also (at a similar age I think) told not to talk with my mouth full. Apparently I just pulled the food out of my mouth with my fingers and carried on talking.
I was also (at a similar age I think) told not to talk with my mouth full. Apparently I just pulled the food out of my mouth with my fingers and carried on talking.
I think I've posted this before, but when one of my daughters was three year's old she managed to get a Polly Pocket stuck up her nose (it was Boxing Day)! Anyhow, we couldn't get the damn thing out with tweezers and eventually we decided to take her to casualty. As I was strapping her in the car she asked "where are we going Daddy?" to which I replied, "to a place where they take things out of people's noses without hurting them". "Oh good", she replied. We got to casualty where it was heaving with people - mostly the great unwashed. After about half an hour some bloke hobbled in who'd clearly dropped something very, very heavy on his foot. He limped over to the seat next to my daughter, wincing in pain on each step, and collapsed onto the chair next to her. My daughter then hops of her chair to face the bloke head on and loudly asked "what you got up your nose then?" The place erupted with laughter! You couldn't have scripted it!
My kids (now 9 and 7) come up with stuff all the time, deliberately I suspect. For example....
Daughter walks in holding out a finger, and says "Mummy, what does this smell of?". Mummy sniffs, and can't identify the odour. "What is it then?" she asks. "It smells of bum!" says the little angel with a big grin. She (daughter) was about 5 at the time.
Daughter walks in holding out a finger, and says "Mummy, what does this smell of?". Mummy sniffs, and can't identify the odour. "What is it then?" she asks. "It smells of bum!" says the little angel with a big grin. She (daughter) was about 5 at the time.
When eldest son was still learning to talk, we were walking around the supermarket. He was sat in the seat facing me...he suddenly pointed at my watch and started shouting;
"Daddy's Cock, Daddy's Cock" - the little mite couldn't quite say 'Clock' properly....
If you've never seen a busy supermarket go quiet...it's not a fun experience....
"Daddy's Cock, Daddy's Cock" - the little mite couldn't quite say 'Clock' properly....
If you've never seen a busy supermarket go quiet...it's not a fun experience....
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