your funniest and cruellest retaliations please .....

[Lord Pikey]

Ladies, Gentlemen and immature adults,

About 4am this morning my wonderful neighbour-of-sorts decided that he really really wanted to hear some drum and bass. Now I live in a hotel and have done since June so I presume im not the only person awoken this morning by him so I cant be bothered with any official complains or even the sensible knock on the door and ask nicely routine for two reasons.

1. I don't speak German
2. After 10mins it was off and i dont speak German.

So, as its friday. whats the most childish way i could hypothetically get revenge?

ps. letter boxes are separate key things so no chances of laying a stink nugget through the flap and if you look at the pic below i might be able to scale to his balcony if i was spider man.

make me laugh..

Edited by Lord Pikey on Friday 10th October 07:47

Edited by Lord Pikey on Friday 10th October 07:52

[Einion Yrth]

He likes drum and bass.


He has suffered enough.

[Emsman]

Im sure a good old fashioned stink bomb could be used.

Mind you, if you are next door, i doubt that is viable?


More annoying would be to get onto the net, translate something really offensive, and say its from another room number.

Then stand well back, and watch the fireworks.

Or play the music from the battle of britain really loud next time he goes to bed.

[Lord Pikey]

Emsman said:

Or play the music from the battle of britain really loud next time he goes to bed.

but, it might offend the entire building......

[Emsman]

Every time i go to germany, i have the dambusters as my ring tone.

Gets a few raised eyebrows, but history is important.


Of course, you could arrange a hooker for him?

Edited by Emsman on Friday 10th October 08:09

[speedy_thrills]

Wire his switches so the lights/sockets etc. don't turn on, he'll ask for a new room and you'll have peace and quiet.

What sort of lock does the room have?

[bob1179]

Emsman said:

Of course, you could arrange a hooker for him?

One of those 'she-male' type ones for added effect?

[Emsman]

Contact adhesive on the door handle.

See how often he uses room service, and if anything gets left outside, eye drops all over it.

Will be stting himself inside out for the weekend.

[Lord Pikey]

speedy_thrills said:

What sort of lock does the room have?

normal key locks, double throw.

not the fancy swipe cards.

[Emsman]

In that case, glue the lock up so he cant get to his stereo!

[ajcj]

If there is a gap under the door slide under a sheet of A3 loaded with as much talcum powder as possible. Then use a hairdryer on maximum blow to create a snowstorm inside the room.

[Lord Pikey]

ajcj said:

If there is a gap under the door slide under a sheet of A3 loaded with as much talcum powder as possible. Then use a hairdryer on maximum blow to create a snowstorm inside the room.

now we are talking! i could probably achive that from the outside if he leaves the balcony door open..

mmmmm, stokes chin with evil intentions...

[ZR1cliff]

Lord Pikey said:

ajcj said:

If there is a gap under the door slide under a sheet of A3 loaded with as much talcum powder as possible. Then use a hairdryer on maximum blow to create a snowstorm inside the room.

now we are talking! i could probably achive that from the outside if he leaves the balcony door open..

mmmmm, stokes chin with evil intentions...

Don't forget to inform the Police there's a drug dealer in the next room.

[speedy_thrills]

Lord Pikey said:

speedy_thrills said:

What sort of lock does the room have?

normal key locks, double throw.

not the fancy swipe cards.

Damn! I was going to say jam the card reader. Still should be easy to break into...

[AMCDan]

the only german insult i know is:

rieche deine Mutter.. i think that's how it's spelt.

Pronounced "reeche" (ch as in loch) "die" (as in dead) "na" "moota"

Raise two fingers and hold under his nose whilst you say it

[FWDRacer]

Accost him in the corridor and beat him like a ginger stepson.

[Fer]

Borrow a dustpan and brush, wedge the dustpan under the door, and take a leak into his room.

[davemac250]

Don't lock him out, lock him in.

Nice squeeze of glue into the locking mechanism, some around the door frame and then the talcum powder bomb in through the window, of course using the window just might give away whodunit!

[LukeBird]

bob1179 said:

Emsman said:

Of course, you could arrange a hooker for him?

One of those 'she-male' type ones for added effect?

Yeah, but dressed up like a leather-clad Nazi in chaps for added effect.


ETA or play Radio 2 really loudly!

Edited by LukeBird on Friday 10th October 08:53

[Piersman2]

Wow, in the hotel photo...those towels have been very neatly hung out!!!

Are there lots of Germans staying there?