DEATH to the Not-Angelic Internet Service Provider.

[Don]

LetterToNotAngelicInternet said:

Dear D***n Internet,

You suck big donkey balls.

Shall I tell you why? It is because you are st.

Thank you for cutting off my broadband overnight last night. Oh. Well I suppose you didn't do that. No. Apparently BT did that. I still have no idea why considering I don't buy broadband from them and my phone line is working just great and I always pay my bills on-time by direct debit to both you and BT. Odd.

But they did it.

And because of that within two fking minutes you proceeded to close my account, delete my webspace, and disable my email.

So when I innocently called up this morning to enquire as to why my fking broadband wasn't working your tech support people gave up instantly and handed me to your customer service people whose only remedy was to sell me broadband again.

When I told you this was unacceptable I just wanted the service I was paying for to be re-instated you said the ONLY way this could be done was by taking out a new contract. The offer of 1 month's free access frankly didn't cut it at this point. I wanted the Internet back on right away so the wife could start work BUT NO - to "re-provision" the service will take a week.

So understandably I signed up immediately.

With BT.

Why? Because if one of THEIR fknuts disables my goddamn fking broadband I can call them up to complain and they will have to fix it. Which you resolutely refused to do. You s.

I didn't tell you to fk off because the broadband went off - that wasn't your fault.
I told you to fk off and I will never purchase anything from you ever again for any fking reason because the level of customer service you offered in the event of the BT fknut fking up was PATHETIC!

I hope you go bust.

Ten years. Ten years a loyal customer and you couldn't be bothered to reinstate my account and call BT to tell them to fking fix the problem they caused.

You are st and I will never, EVER bother with your lousy fking company again. In fact I will be advising every last mate of mine to do the same.

Sod off.

Yours fking sincerely,

Don

Thank you for reading.

[Marf]

5/10 - needs animal sacrifice.

[mechsympathy]

Please tell me you have actually posted that to them

[Mark Benson]

Good rant, needs more threats of violence to family mambers to be perfect.

7/10

[Don]

Marf said:

5/10 - needs animal sacrifice.

Ah. That was what was missing. No pan-fried kitten livers. Bah.

[GreenDog]

10/10 V. Good

[Swilly]

Please post the reply !!

[Puff Puff]

0/10 That's prime waste bin fodder.

[HRG]

Don said:

Marf said:

5/10 - needs animal sacrifice.

Ah. That was what was missing. No pan-fried kitten livers. Bah.

Needs a nice onion gravy to go with that

[tomkandy]

1/10, don't be a cheapskate and use residential broadband for work

[jimmyb]

I agree 10/10

My internet stalls or goes offline i call them, they tell me to check my filters and moniter my internet for a couple of days. Do that call back tell them there is still a problem they ask "have you checked your filters" etc. Then they will claim its my router, the little green men, god, and anyone else before getting to "well its not our fault so if you say its not your router, filter, god etc then we can pass it to bt but you WILL be charged £150 )

F ING morons.

Sadly though most int so called service providers are the same.

Edited by jimmyb on Friday 30th January 15:36

[MK4 Slowride]

GreenDog said:

10/10 V. Good

Pfft way too generous, we're not talking a government contract here.

7/10

[largerandrock]

6.5/10 More threats to there spouses and forced feltching would get you uo to a 8.5

[Neil_H]

2/10

Nice swearing and anger conveyence, but lost marks for usage of "the wife", petulant boasting ("I'll tell my mates about you") and lack of violent threats.

No request for resolution, informing that business has already been moved elsewhere; ultimately a flawed complaint.

Edited by Neil_H on Friday 30th January 15:22

[Jasandjules]

5.5/10.

Simple expletives used well, but no interesting and/or unusual insults.

[Don]

Neil_H said:

2/10

Nice swearing and anger conveyence, but lost marks for usage of "the wife", petulant boasting ("I'll tell my mates about you") and lack of violent threats.

No request for resolution, informing that business has already been moved elsewhere; ultimately a flawed complaint.

Egad. PH has the toughest critics!

I shall try harder next time!

[Nolar Dog]

1/10

You've lost them at donkey balls I'm afraid.
They won't read the rest.

[Don]

tomkandy said:

1/10, don't be a cheapskate and use residential broadband for work

Actually it was their "Home Office" package for teleworkers.

What got me was that without even contacting their customer they simply closed the account. No one rang me, no-one wrote to me, no-one checked to see if I was happy. They just did it.

So, basically, the warning is.

You may think you are buying your broadband from a broadband provider. You are not. You are buying it from BT and letting the broadband provider bill you instead. BT decide whether or not you get the service and can terminate it at any time and, if you have an ISP that is st like mine, they just roll-over and won't even bother to fight their customers corner.

s.

[Don]

Nolar Dog said:

1/10

You've lost them at donkey balls I'm afraid.
They won't read the rest.

It's not actually for them to read. It's meant to provide you with thirty seconds entertainment and me with some much needed catharsis. Which it has, thank you very much.

[Podie]

Surprised you lasted a decade with those jokers Don... heard countless tales of poor service and disconnections.