Child Free Flights - Surely a Winner?
Child Free Flights - Surely a Winner?
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The Curn

Original Poster:

917 posts

241 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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I’m flying to New Zealand on Saturday and the flight time all in with a short break and plane change in Singapore is near on 30 hours.

I normally quite enjoy flying long haul; I have a few drinks, read a good book, catch up on some films that I never seem to have the time to watch at home. Generally kick back and relax safe in the knowledge that I have bugger all to do and that limitless quantities of chilled white wine and soda water is available at the touch of a button. With earphones in, no one can spoil the proceedings.

This time however is different. There is limited excitement about the impending holiday, no looking forward to 30 hours with nothing to do except fill my mind with media and my body with tasty morsels and fine wine, no care free spring in my step as I forget about work for three weeks, because something scary looms.

The flight will be shared with my 10 month old daughter, who, although fairly happy go lucky and chilled out for a 10 month old, is not, I’d imagine going to stay still and silent for 30 hours.

Now apart from my own discomfort, it is the other travelers that I really feel for. They too are on holiday and have saved up, maybe even for the trip of a life time or a honeymoon and will potentially have to put up with the screaming, banging, shrieking, and squirming, of not only my child but all the others too. A year ago I would have been mortified to find myself sitting next to “vocal” toddler on a long flight; I am now on the other side of the fence and feel just as much trepidation.

I’m not looking forward to the looks of despair from fellow travelers as I struggle into the departure lounge, loaded with changing bags, toys, and a pushchair. I’m not looking forward to persuading customs officials that the powders and liquids we are carrying are indeed baby food and are necessary. Neither am I looking forward to entertaining an over tired crying baby, with minimum noise under the irritable stare of fellow passengers, or changing her nappies in the tiny loo cubicle.

Anyway this got me thinking.

Why don’t they run Child Flights, in which children are welcomed and parents can relax knowing that everyone on board will be expecting some noise and occasional thrown food and funny smells?

There would also be Non Child Flights, in which those without children or on business can relax safe in the knowledge that they will not be disturbed by anything more than the occasional offer of a top up from a sultry looking air hostess?

There must be a huge demand for each type of flight. Can anyone in the industry explain?


Bob Turner

405 posts

239 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Airlines with A380s could manage something similar to this quite easily, kids downstairs; grown-ups upstairs.

There's also the business class option...

Nicholas Blair

4,111 posts

313 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Have you got your basinette seat sorted out ?

Prometheus

367 posts

212 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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The Curn said:
There must be a huge demand for each type of flight.
Really?

I'd have thought that in standard class flights families far outweigh lone travellers?

TonyHetherington

32,091 posts

279 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Bob Turner said:
There's also the business class option...
Alas that doesn't negate the possibiltiy of kids.

MonkeyBusiness

4,240 posts

216 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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That's a very good idea.

I must admit when I was childless, I used to wince at the thought of a child within range of me. Now I have a <flight friendly> four year old, it doesn't bother me one bit even if another child is screaming for the whole flight (in fact I end up offering to share my childs toys, etc).

It would be a start if on long haul they showed childrens TV on the screens (maybe they do I haven't been on a long haul for a while).

stumpage

2,209 posts

255 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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I have to fly with my 2 year old in a couple of weeks. It's a four hour flight and I am dreading it.

I am trying to think of things to keep her occupied and quiet, instead of family flights why don't they have different sections of the plane.

Business, Club, Child free and Family. May make it more comfortable for all.

Edited by stumpage on Tuesday 17th February 14:22

XXVIII

2,800 posts

243 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Some of those huge aircraft could have a nursery with decent and well qualified (NNEB at least) nursery staff as well...

A girl mate of ours went to NZ a few weeks ago and was seated between two women who had babies with them between Heathrow and Dubai... One baby was quiet as a mouse but the other one screamed for most of the time... The screamer's mother asked my mate to hold 'stuff' at 10 minute intervals, the other woman couldn't have been less obtrusive if she'd tried... a tale of two 'attitudes' if ever there was one!

Mrs XXVIII used to manage a 40+ place private nursery in Ealing up to 2004 and says in a similar situation she'd still be able to cancel the noise of the screaming out. My mate says that there was NOBODY getting off that plane faster than her that day and she was delighted that Ms. & Ms. Scream-Fidgitmuckabout were not on the linking flight to... (forget where, Singapore / KL ????)

Mrs XXVIII does say she's never going back to running a nursery though - even though she had references so glowing and letters of tearful farewell from parents and colleagues back then. Salary wasn't bad either, unlike up here where the nursery sector is just an ever-worsening joke both state and private...

Child 'otherwise entertained' flights would be a great idea, can't see them coming to RyanAir's fleet any time soon though!

aclivity

4,072 posts

217 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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I don't think any airline would realistically turn away a customer - so if they have 200 seats on a nominally child free flight, and only 100 sold, a paying customer with 99 kids would quickly cause the flight to be reclassified "mixed".

They may be able to move the curtain forward a bit, perhaps?

When my eldest was 10 months old we flew to Madeira for a short holiday. Madeira is popular with older folk, we were the youngest 3 people on the aircraft. My daughter had 2 hours of 200 adopted grandparents clucking and fussing!

Rotary Madness

2,285 posts

215 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Why not just keep them awake the night before so they are knackered, then give them some of those night aid cough syrup things, knock em out for ages biggrin

My parents tell me when i was about 2, i managed to get hold of an open bottle of champagne at christmas time and proceeded to drink quite a bit of it. They tell me that i was pretty much asleep constantly for a few days, doctors said i wasnt in any danger and to be happy i was quiet biggrin

Not that id publically condone drugging small children to shut them upwhistle

wiffmaster

2,621 posts

227 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Not separate flights necessarily, but separate sections would be welcomed. That goes for most things actually - never understood why there isn't a family section in most restaurants. Would make it much more pleasant for the parents as they needn't worry about annoying people, and it would obviously be much nicer for those of us without kids. It's win/win, so why hasn't it been done?

The Curn

Original Poster:

917 posts

241 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
quotequote all
TonyHetherington said:
Bob Turner said:
There's also the business class option...
Alas that doesn't negate the possibiltiy of kids.
You are right. We are in Business.

loafer123

16,663 posts

244 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Medised.

Hedders

24,460 posts

276 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Chewable valium for kiddies? :P

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zao77YjaqQU

Zod

35,295 posts

287 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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How about flights without rude people, drunks, snorers and tornado-farters? They all disturb me to a greater extent than kids.

Don

28,378 posts

313 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Prometheus said:
The Curn said:
There must be a huge demand for each type of flight.
Really?

I'd have thought that in standard class flights families far outweigh lone travellers?
Surprisingly few people travel with youngsters. They know that it is sheer hell and don't do it. Add to that that most "business" flights aren't on "business class" due to the expense.

Not much you do, Curn, other than not go. Your wee one will be as good as gold a proportion of the time and a wee st the rest. Same as the others around you. And yes - they do put you all together next to the bulkhead. That's so when one kicks off then they all do. Fantastic sense of humour shown there I thought. hehe

It's why I book seats two third of the way back. Got to be careful not to go all the way to the back else you've got to put up the idiots who waited until they were on the plane to UNLEASH the AWESOME contents of the bowels. Inconsiderate feckers.

cottonfoo

6,050 posts

239 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Zod said:
How about flights without rude people, drunks, snorers and tornado-farters? They all disturb me to a greater extent than kids.
Also people that constantly sniff frown I sent a rocket up someone's arse for that, after 6 hours of tolerance!

Being in business (or first) won't negate the possibility, there are bassinets in all three classes. However, it is generally adults that fk me off more.

Don

28,378 posts

313 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Zod said:
How about flights without rude people, drunks, snorers and tornado-farters? They all disturb me to a greater extent than kids.
Ah yes. The Tornado-Farter. Otherwise known as Johnny Fartpants - always a commotion in his trousers. (Viz).

Pressure drops. Same amount of gas in there. Got to equalise pressure = Tornado Farting. Horrible effect.

To be honest I don't mind the fact it happens - but the feckers who get up off their seats and come and stand two thirds of the way down the cabin to let one go whilst pretending to stretch their legs really feck me off. They aren't stretching. The dirty feckers are farting - and just didn't want to do it next to the Mrs.

Me? I'm big, old and ugly enough to make it to the bog if I'm going to let go a stinker.

RDMcG

20,832 posts

236 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
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Great idea. I fly long haul a lot, and my current solution is to use Bose noise cancelling headphones. The things are amazing...I had not realized the the sound from the aircraft audio was so good. I leave them on white noise otherwise and it makes a big difference, even if children are crying nearby.I can sleep.

The Curn

Original Poster:

917 posts

241 months

Tuesday 17th February 2009
quotequote all
Don said:
They aren't stretching. The dirty feckers are farting - and just didn't want to do it next to the Mrs.
rofl