Below pondlife

[C8PPO]

Well, I didn't know where to post this so I thought here, amongst friends.....

My son was going out with a girl who turned out to be quite quite mad, (long story), with a family to match, and he finished with her. Today, she asked him to meet her somewhere to talk about things, and whilst he was with her (which turned out to be a decoy, she didn't want to see him at all), his car was comprehensively trashed, with what looks like a crowbar and a ball-pein hammer. Every single bit of glass gone, the lights, plus big dents to several panels.

He's 23 years old and called me; when I got to him he burst into tears. TPFT insurance only.

She later boasted to him to about how her brother and uncle (or something like that) had done his car over. He told the police but there's no proof and they say they can't do anything. Trouble is, she also said that next time it's him and not the car, so I need to find a way of getting the police properly interested.

The temptation to round up my brother and deal with it ourselves is close to overwhelming.

[nonplussed]

Were they travellers?

[Gas_Man]

Feel for you mate, really I do. I can relate to both your feelings and those of your son having had similar "issues" in the past. In such situations I have rarely found the police to be effective. In my own situation I was fortunate to have some helpful "friends" who were generous enough to assist me.
Good luck mate, seriously.

[after_shock]

Bit of an awkward one that, could be worth trying to set them up so that they make a move on him and that then gives you and your brother the right to step in but its putting him at a big risk as they dont sound like nice people.

The police wont get involved unless they have hard evidence, i.e a crime has been committed and you have evidence of it happening, as the car is already damaged last thing you want is your son being the one getting done over.

Personally I would probably take your second option but you then run the risk of that back firing on you and having the police on your back.

If you can leave it for a bit and get them when they think its all over and done with and dont expect it, just need an excuse to do what you want to do!

[C8PPO]

They're not travellers. I met some of the family a while back. I don't quite know how to describe them. In all seriousness they probably are in-breds. Imagine the english unempployed version of a yankee redneck - make any sense?

The last comment above about leaving it a while before acting really is top of my list just now.

[Boosted LS1]

Would be really useful if you could record a conversation where somebody makes a confession. Use a mini tape recorder and lapel microphone or do it over the telephone. Provoke her into admitting it.

[C8PPO]

Boosted LS1 said:

Would be really useful if you could record a conversation where somebody makes a confession. Use a mini tape recorder and lapel microphone or do it over the telephone. Provoke her into admitting it.

Do you think the BiB would take notice of that? She and her family are almost certainly stupid enough to do that. Perhaps by phone?

[Boosted LS1]

You can use the microphone method I suggested or buy what's known in the trade as an ATR (automatic telephone recorder) which is basically a modified tape recorder plugged into your phone socket. It records conversations. Phone her up, ask her why she did it, lay it on that she's ruined your son's life and the silly bint will probably get all cocky and mouthy. She's stuffed if she does. What's more she'll probably confess at the police station if they present her with a transcript.

ATR's aren't illegal if they're on your phone line afaik. You may have to get one from a detective agency or maybe even Maplins or a place like that. Price can be from £100 to £500 depending on how unscrupulous the agency is.

The microphone method is cheap but means a face to face meeting.

[Gas_Man]

They MAY take notice of it, so long as the conversation isn't an obvious set-up. If it happened to be a recorded conversation where SHE makes first mention of the incident, then that would certainly help... alternatively, borrow my "friends" when you find it appropriate.

[C8PPO]

Thanks guys.

[stigmundfreud]

C8PPO said:

Boosted LS1 said:

Would be really useful if you could record a conversation where somebody makes a confession. Use a mini tape recorder and lapel microphone or do it over the telephone. Provoke her into admitting it.

Do you think the BiB would take notice of that? She and her family are almost certainly stupid enough to do that. Perhaps by phone?

Yes they do, done it myself and evidence was used in court. There are ways of doing it, it is fully legal for you to record conversations without telling people (that includes phone calls). You just have to be careful to ensure you capture the full conversation and do not goad or lead them.

[C8PPO]

I'll look into getting something he can use to record.

This is all utterly alien to me. Nobody who I know or associate with is the sort of person to act so mindlessly. Makes it worse somehow - I imagine the perps are probably watching TV with their feet up and not giving anything a second thought beyond what they plan to shoplift tomorrow.

[stigmundfreud]

C8PPO said:

I'll look into getting something he can use to record.

This is all utterly alien to me. Nobody who I know or associate with is the sort of person to act so mindlessly. Makes it worse somehow - I imagine the perps are probably watching TV with their feet up and not giving anything a second thought beyond what they plan to shoplift tomorrow.

get down to maplins explain the situation, they carry pretty much all you will need

[C8PPO]

Cheers Stig.

[Mr_annie_vxr]

In the short term you could just get him to text her to ask why she got them to damage the car. Texts are good evidence. Although would bs better for evidence of harrassment or threats to damage.

Has he actually made a criminal report? If he does make sure he insists they are named as offenders. Although on just the evidence of her saying it there is no enough to secure a prosecution it should still lead to their arrest as it's a line if enquiry.

Without a witness to the incident or CCTV unless those that did the damage confess a criminal prosecution is unlikely. You could look at a civil claim through small claims.

It all depends if he wants this to drag on. Depending on how thick and stupid these people are they may just continue it all and the criminnal bits could be months. It's not the right answer but it may be having to chalk it up and leave it just to avoid dragging it out. Criminal prosecution could be months long or longer and he may have a new gf by then and then shell get dragged into it. Having seen lots of this stuff many victims although satisfied with the prosecution outcome wished they'd just left it rather than months of hassle and stress.

All depends what he wants. Never go out with mental women.

I know it's not what should happen and I hate to see people get away with stuff but it's just seeing the impact dragging it out has had in the time between arrest and prosecution.

It's also my experience that in this world what goes around does eventually come around.

[C8PPO]

Mr_annie_vxr said:

I know it's not what should happen and I hate to see people get away with stuff but it's just seeing the impact dragging it out has had in the time between arrest and prosecution.

I think that, and the fact that unless you drop to their level, it could happen again, are what are make "normal" people drop it. A victim could risk retaliation but end up in trouble, whereas for people like these, a spell in prison is such a part of normal life that it would have no real effect on them at all, whereas the rest of us have careers, reputations, etc to consider.

[Mr_annie_vxr]

C8PPO said:

Mr_annie_vxr said:

I know it's not what should happen and I hate to see people get away with stuff but it's just seeing the impact dragging it out has had in the time between arrest and prosecution.

I think that, and the fact that unless you drop to their level, it could happen again, are what are make "normal" people drop it. A victim could risk retaliation but end up in trouble, whereas for people like these, a spell in prison is such a part of normal life that it would have no real effect on them at all, whereas the rest of us have careers, reputations, etc to consider.

I'm afraid you are right. Even a caution for me would end my career.

I'd like to see them dealt with but you have to weigh it all up. In their world though they do end up on the receiving end and you have to look at what you have compared to them. It's a lesson in knowing a bit more about a gf than that she has a nice bum and gives good head. God forbid he'd married her.

[slackalice]

Just walk away, your boy just learnt a lesson, one he won't forget in a hurry. You don't need to learn the same lesson.

I have a boy of 24, and my god he cut his teeth on a roughie!!!!!!! and now has a great little girl, and for me I like her too, well her dad owns a garage Well ?????

[crisisjez]

These type of people don`t respect the law, so IMO if you are just after justice, forget it.
You could end up loosing a great deal more than a car unfortunately.
If you feel that there is a real danger that this is not over and that your lad is still at risk your only option to protect him BEFORE he gets hurt would be to show the family you have a bigger stick than them, because they`ll understand that.
But it has to be overkill or someone really really scary or known in the area to be sucessful.

Not good advice I`m afraid but reality in this day and age.....

[Drew SS]

Just brake her neck sounds good to me