Being an usher at a wedding
Being an usher at a wedding
Author
Discussion

Rob.

Original Poster:

17,911 posts

239 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
On Saturday I will be an usher at a friends wedding, the first time I have been one. So, have done the usual Googling of the subject and reading up and thought I'd turn to the good people of PH for any suggestions or advice on carrying out the duty - I'm good with the basics but did'nt know of something I may not have stumbled across to make a difference as it were. Any stories too while we're at it?!

I await the usual mix of responses!

Edited to make question clearer as I'm happy with the basics - wit still welcome though!

Edited by Rob. on Wednesday 13th May 17:07

sleep envy

62,260 posts

270 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
the only thing you have to ask is 'bride or groom?' and make sure everyone has transport from the ceremony to the reception

then you can pat yourself on the back and get slaughtered whilst goosing the bridesmaids

job done


trickywoo

13,434 posts

251 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Think its a requirement to 'service' the pick of the bridesmaids.

Engineer1

10,486 posts

230 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Usher can be anything from just saying bride/groom and then sending people to the right side of the church to a bigger job keeping old of cash to pay the DJ or similar.

Landlord

12,689 posts

278 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
:rollsupsleves: Your job is to tell everyone to 'ush during the ceremony.

tumbleweed

Seriously, ladies and germs, your job is as sleep envy says. Merely look smart, check out the ladies in the delicate frocks and tell them which side to sit... checking out their arse as they make their way to the pew/bence/chair. You may need to hand out an order of service, too.

Working Class

8,973 posts

208 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Landlord said:
bence
scratchchin

Burnham

3,668 posts

280 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Landlord said:
:rollsupsleves: Your job is to tell everyone to 'ush during the ceremony.

tumbleweed

Seriously, ladies and germs, your job is as sleep envy says. Merely look smart, check out the ladies in the delicate frocks and tell them which side to sit... checking out their arse as they make their way to the pew/bence/chair. You may need to hand out an order of service, too.
..and to nail the chief bridesmaid.

whitechief

4,431 posts

216 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Not much too it really as well as what others have said, you may be required to round people up as and when they are needed for Photographs.

dirty boy

14,815 posts

230 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
whitechief said:
Not much too it really as well as what others have said, you may be required to round people up as and when they are needed for Photographs.
Best man normally does that.

The one time I was an Usher, all I did was take money off people for the sweepstakes on speech length and number of laughs the Best Man would get.


tubbystu

3,846 posts

281 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Burnham said:
..and to nail the chief bridesmaid.
That's the best man's job (unless the groom hasn't shown in which case he gets the bride).

Ushers get 2nd dibs


Rob.

Original Poster:

17,911 posts

239 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
I like the sweepstake idea...

scratchchin

dirty boy

14,815 posts

230 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Rob. said:
I like the sweepstake idea...

scratchchin
Paid for a couple of beers, took a 'slice' for running the book hehe


NDA

24,328 posts

246 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
trickywoo said:
Think its a requirement to 'service' the pick of the bridesmaids.
This is pretty much what I've heard too. In fact they're rather disappointed if you don't.

Also fighting is highly recommended during the first dance, start with a head butt and see how you get on.

Ganglandboss

8,482 posts

224 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
It is your duty to cop a feel of any chesty ladies' norks as you are putting on their button-holes.

Scrubs

976 posts

225 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Engineer1 said:
Usher can be anything from just saying bride/groom and then sending people to the right side of the church
Yeah,that way you can have he whole of the left side to yourself..

bigdods

7,175 posts

248 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
I cant believe no one has mentioned the handing out of the hot towels. You have booked a hostess trolley and ordered the towels havent you ? Dont leave it too late or they will all be gone.

Simpo Two

90,716 posts

286 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
For starters, ask your friends what they want you to do.

Plus, as a wedding tog I like to have the usher/s as buddies for rounding up people for any group photos requred smile

zcacogp

11,239 posts

265 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
I've 'Ushered' more times than I can remember, and it's different every time.

Broadly, you are there to help the Best Man. So, as everyone has said, directing people, telling them where to sit, giving them instructions on how to get to the reception, handing out glasses of water if it's too hot, pushing wheelchairs for Great Aunt Flo, taking wedding presents and cards etc etc etc. I've had to call an ambulance twice (once when a lady got sunstroke during the photos at one wedding, once when someone fell down a large flight of stairs just before the reception), parked about a million cars in a field when some guests decided they fancied the idea of 'valet-parking' and comforted distraught mothers-of-brides (no, not 'comforted' like that, get your minds out of the sewer.)

Oh and if the Best Man is a bit feckless then you may end up 'organising' him a little. A lot depends upon him and how good he is, whether there is professional assistants for the photographer, how the catering is done, how many other ushers there are and so on.


Oli.


Nurburgsingh

5,384 posts

259 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
I ushed for a couple of mates. made a real big mistake the first time...

Was told to reserve the best seat in the house for the brides mums mum. I was stood at the door doing the whole bride/groom thing and this little 'ole lady pipes up.. "I'm the brides grandmother" so I'm all " I have a special seat you for you.. come with me.." I get the whole " what a polite young man" etc.. and I walk away thinking I've done the best job in the world chuffed to bits I was until the brides mums mum turned up!! I'd sat the brides dads mum in the "hot seat". Normally not a big issue but the brides folks had seperated and it was daggers at dawn!

Needless to say i steered well clear of the brides mum for the duration.

Oh yeah another part of the job.. If you're wearing hats and tails.. you have to start the obligitory "Odd Job" fight and try and take the grooms head off with your top hat!

oh and kick the back doors in on a couple of bridesmaids.

Rob.

Original Poster:

17,911 posts

239 months

Wednesday 13th May 2009
quotequote all
Thanks chaps. Met with most involved tonight for the church rehersal and food after for a chat about how the bride and groom want things doing and all sounds good. I plan to add touches where appropriate as the day goes on. The only woman I'll be touching is my missus by the way.