Einstein: let me help you Albert, I can answer that one

[Emsman]

The hyper intelligent chap once stated:

I know not with what weapons world war three will be fought but world war 4 will be fought with sticks and stones

Well, having just got back from the pub (albeit somewhat later than planned) the answer you are looking for is:

The enemy will launch a terrible verbal assault at the onset of war.
This will be followed up with a bout of name calling, intelligence reports from various spies providing evidance of sufficient weight to wage war.
The defending (one man) army will think quickly on it's feet, and counter with a deadly gas attack, which will stir his foe into an apoplectic rage, leading to assault with pasta sauce, bad language, a little over half a pint of water and a bunch of half dead flowers.

So, albert there you go.
Roll on sticks and stones.

I shall now retreat to scorched earth no mans land of the spare room

[Emsman]

It would appear my foe is more ruthless than I first thought.
The spare room has been invaded, and is under the control of her closest allies, the cats.

I shall march through the night (well, 20 seconds) to the safety of the sofa (via the kitchen for a quick beer)

[RupertTheFridge]

Emsman said:

It would appear my foe is more ruthless than I first thought.
The spare room has been invaded, and is under the control of her closest allies, the cats.

I shall march through the night (well, 20 seconds) to the safety of the sofa (via the kitchen for a quick beer)

What have you done chap, surely not used a "bashed her back doors in" reference again?

[Poledriver]

Good night was it?

PS Whatever you do, don't put a banner up expressing your feelings!

[micky g]

Good luck mate, been behind enemy lines more than a few times, wardrobe's full of T shirts...

[Emsman]

RupertTheFridge said:

Emsman said:

It would appear my foe is more ruthless than I first thought.
The spare room has been invaded, and is under the control of her closest allies, the cats.

I shall march through the night (well, 20 seconds) to the safety of the sofa (via the kitchen for a quick beer)

What have you done chap, surely not used a "bashed her back doors in" reference again?

I appear to be very drunk. I think it was the fenny ( I think) my mate bought me back from goa.

It's quite strong, and advisable not to drink too much if you are 'only going for one

[RupertTheFridge]

Emsman said:

RupertTheFridge said:

Emsman said:

It would appear my foe is more ruthless than I first thought.
The spare room has been invaded, and is under the control of her closest allies, the cats.

I shall march through the night (well, 20 seconds) to the safety of the sofa (via the kitchen for a quick beer)

What have you done chap, surely not used a "bashed her back doors in" reference again?

I appear to be very drunk. I think it was the fenny ( I think) my mate bought me back from goa.

It's quite strong, and advisable not to drink too much if you are 'only going for one

I love the "only going for one" excuse, glad to see you are bringing it back!

[Famous Graham]

[Connolly]My wife thinks a pint is THIS big (gestures from head to toe).

"I'm away for a pint"

"Home! <hic>"
[/Connolly]

[Emsman]

Quick update:

She decided 'we' should go for a beer tonight, we had one, came home, had dinner, I made the mistake of voicing my dissaproval at the idea of watching big brother.
My laptop is now in the floor-smashed, and I can only conclude that she is a fking loony.

So, I'm off.

fking nutter

[dfen5]

Hmm. Custard.

[kartmaster4213]

lmao

better than bloody emmerdale this place. God bless PH.

[Pigeon]

Emsman said:

Quick update:

She decided 'we' should go for a beer tonight, we had one, came home, had dinner, I made the mistake of voicing my dissaproval at the idea of watching big brother.
My laptop is now in the floor-smashed, and I can only conclude that she is a fking loony.

So, I'm off.

fking nutter

I don't usually post agreement on such threads as this, but in this case I will make an exception. Anyone who actually wants to watch Big Brother is beyond question a fking looney. I would recommend smashing the TV (possibly using the remains of the laptop) and not replacing it for 3 months.

[Famous Graham]

Emsman said:

Quick update:

She decided 'we' should go for a beer tonight, we had one, came home, had dinner, I made the mistake of voicing my dissaproval at the idea of watching big brother.
My laptop is now in the floor-smashed, and I can only conclude that she is a fking loony.

So, I'm off.

fking nutter

Fatal error.

"We had one"

Should have got her pissed.

[dmitsi]

You should've smashed up the TV with the broken laptop then gone back to the pub. No one should watch that ste. Oh and you should write a banner, it'll help clear the air.

[Simpo Two]

Emsman said:

She decided 'we' should go for a beer tonight, we had one, came home, had dinner, I made the mistake of voicing my dissaproval at the idea of watching big brother. My laptop is now in the floor-smashed

If that's true, walk away and don't look back. It may be alcohol-fuelled but if that's the way one or both of you lives then the same advice applies. I nearly got caught too; my house still bears the scars if you know where to look, and had I stayed with it, I would now be either insane, bankrupt or both.

[turbobloke]

Simpo Two said:

Emsman said:

She decided 'we' should go for a beer tonight, we had one, came home, had dinner, I made the mistake of voicing my dissaproval at the idea of watching big brother. My laptop is now in the floor-smashed

If that's true, walk away and don't look back. It may be alcohol-fuelled but if that's the way one or both of you lives then the same advice applies. I nearly got caught too; my house still bears the scars if you know where to look, and had I stayed with it, I would now be either insane, bankrupt or both.

There's a lot of it about.

[asbo]

Hang on, she smashed your laptop?

That's a little harsh.

How are you posting now incidentally?

[BrassMan]

asbo said:

Hang on, she smashed your laptop?

That's a little harsh.

How are you posting now incidentally?

When the post count gets high enough, some become able to post without a physical connection.

[Emsman]

Or on their I phone.

I'm packing

I'm off