Need to get hold of a Gosling. Fast....

[schmalex]

All,

I am in the st. One of goslings got taken by a red kite today. If my wife finds out when she returns from the US tomorrow at 11am, i will be killed.

This is serious & I need some help. I promised I wouldn't let anything die this time.

[fivesixseven8]

Just don't piss in the kettle, you'll be OK

[ih8thisname]

Deny all knowledge of it ever being there in the first place.

[anonymous-user]

can't help on the gosling - blame it on the feline we - she was distracting you!

Edited by anonymous-user on Thursday 4th June 19:45

[groucho]

schmalex said:

All,

I am in the st. One of goslings got taken by a red kite today. If my wife finds out when she returns from the US tomorrow at 11am, i will be killed.

This is serious & I need some help. I promised I wouldn't let anything die this time.

Where abouts do you live to get Kites?

[Scotfox]

How many Goslings do you have ? Will she actually notice that one is gone ? Can't you explain that it's natures way of weeding out the weak and the slow ?

[rhinochopig]

Blimey, Rolph Harris has nothing on you.

[anonymous-user]

We get lots of kites here in south yorkshire, but if they can take a gosling, then i think the manufacturers need to advise parents before they take their little ones out to fly a kite!

[littlegreenfairy]

I know I shouldn't...

How do you manage it?!

[Rollin]

Mmmmm, Goslings.

[Scotfox]

rhinochopig said:

Blimey, Rolph Harris has nothing on you.

Nah I can't play a didgeridoo . Did have a Stylophone once many years ago though

Sounds like schmalex will be the next one to be weeded out if he can't come up with a solution.

[TheEnd]

With your track record, do you think anyone would give you any kind of animal?
Dr Hanibal Doolitle's Menagerie of Death

[thinfourth2]

And on Sunday

schmalex said:

On top of this, I have also been advised that our 6 goslings keep trying to escape from the gazebo we put up in the paddock to give them some shade. Consequently, the local buzzards are circling lower & lower over our house & I am under strict instructions not to let any animals die this time.

LMAO

[hollowpockets]

Wow, your wife sounds like fun...

[anonymous-user]

hollowpockets said:

Wow, your wife sounds like fun...

Bring a pencil!

[Davi]

tell her you sold it.

She said don't let anything die, didn't say don't sell them.

Offer to buy her dinner with the "proceeds" from the sale.

[schmalex]

groucho said:

schmalex said:

All,

I am in the st. One of goslings got taken by a red kite today. If my wife finds out when she returns from the US tomorrow at 11am, i will be killed.

This is serious & I need some help. I promised I wouldn't let anything die this time.

Where abouts do you live to get Kites?

Watership Down. On the Hants / Berks border

[schmalex]

hollowpockets said:

Wow, your wife sounds like fun...

She's lovely, she really is. But, she really loves her animals. Don't get me wrong, I do too, I'm just not very good at the whole looking after thing.

In my defence, I put 6 goslings in the gazebo this morning & then had to go to work for the day, so had no way of checking on them.

I've done the manly thing & told her by text message. Then turned the mobile off.

[anonymous-user]

mmm! Goslings! I knew that Red Kite outfit would come in handy.

On a serious note try the River Cottage forum! losts of people on there who know about waterfoul

Edited by MonkeyMatt on Thursday 4th June 21:00

[Racefan_uk]

She does understand how the natural world works, doesn't she? I mean, goslings, out in the garden, bird of prey overhead, spots snack, dives in for snack, gets snack, eats snack, proves that he's higher on the food chain etc etc.

I take it you've moved the other goslings inside now to avoid a repeat of todays scenario...