ATM's that don't tell you they have no money!!!!!!!!!
Discussion
I joined a queue to get some spendoolies from the Coop cash machine yesterday, waited my turn, as the people in front seemed to be faffing about.
So, I got to the front, card in, number, ****, screen popped up asking me if I wanted balance info, telephone top up or some other rubbish. Nowhere to ask for cash. I tried a few options, still no joy. I logged out, logged back in, f
ked about for another minute or two then gave up in fkin' disgust. It had no cash, but unlike every other ATM in the fkin' world this bd couldn't simply say that at the fkin' start, like "Sorry, No Cash Available", as they obviously hoped I'd spend some fkin' money topping up my fkstick mobile while I was there!!! fkin' bds trying to grab every fkin' cent they can even though they fkin' waste dozens of people time!! 
No chance you can walk up, see there's no cash, got to another machine. oh no, these assholes want to do there best to possibly milk you for something you didn't really want. Like, oh, there's no fkin' cash, I'll fill my phone and check my balance seeing as I'm fkstting here and logged in alfkinready!!!!!!!
As I left I told the person behind that there's no cash in the machine, but the machine operator was too fkeyed greedy to be polite enough to explain that before you log in.
Nobody in front of ME in the queue bothered telling me, even though three people had tried to use it before me. Selfish Lazy bds!!!
So, I got to the front, card in, number, ****, screen popped up asking me if I wanted balance info, telephone top up or some other rubbish. Nowhere to ask for cash. I tried a few options, still no joy. I logged out, logged back in, f
ked about for another minute or two then gave up in fkin' disgust. It had no cash, but unlike every other ATM in the fkin' world this bd couldn't simply say that at the fkin' start, like "Sorry, No Cash Available", as they obviously hoped I'd spend some fkin' money topping up my fkstick mobile while I was there!!! fkin' bds trying to grab every fkin' cent they can even though they fkin' waste dozens of people time!! No chance you can walk up, see there's no cash, got to another machine. oh no, these assholes want to do there best to possibly milk you for something you didn't really want. Like, oh, there's no f
kin' cash, I'll fill my phone and check my balance seeing as I'm fkstting here and logged in alfkinready!!!!!!!As I left I told the person behind that there's no cash in the machine, but the machine operator was too f
keyed greedy to be polite enough to explain that before you log in.Nobody in front of ME in the queue bothered telling me, even though three people had tried to use it before me. Selfish Lazy b
ds!!!King Herald said:
Nobody in front of ME in the queue bothered telling me, even though three people had tried to use it before me. Selfish Lazy bds!!!
I've lost count of the number of times I've told people behind me there's no cash yet they still go ahead and try it for themselves !!ds!!!Edited by Scotfox on Friday 3rd July 11:32
Bit like the speaking self check out in B & Q, says everything to you, tells you what do, how to do it, when I tried to pay with my American Express Card, it politely said "Please wait for an assistance".
About 5 minutes later an assistant turned up and told me "Oh we dont take Amex", why couldn't the bloody talking machine tell me.
Last week I called a B.A number, as usual you have 6 choices, and do you what know? its always No6 you want, then another 5 or 6 choices, and guess what, yes its the last choice....................
So you press 6 and it says "We are sorry, we are closed until Monday"....why cant they tell you FIRST, morons.............
About 5 minutes later an assistant turned up and told me "Oh we dont take Amex", why couldn't the bloody talking machine tell me.
Last week I called a B.A number, as usual you have 6 choices, and do you what know? its always No6 you want, then another 5 or 6 choices, and guess what, yes its the last choice....................
So you press 6 and it says "We are sorry, we are closed until Monday"....why cant they tell you FIRST, morons.............
Vipers said:
Bit like the speaking self check out in B & Q, says everything to you, tells you what do, how to do it, when I tried to pay with my American Express Card, it politely said "Please wait for an assistance".
About 5 minutes later an assistant turned up and told me "Oh we dont take Amex", why couldn't the bloody talking machine tell me.
Last week I called a B.A number, as usual you have 6 choices, and do you what know? its always No6 you want, then another 5 or 6 choices, and guess what, yes its the last choice....................
So you press 6 and it says "We are sorry, we are closed until Monday"....why cant they tell you FIRST, morons.............
Or the Brazilian consulate in London, that gives you five minutes of waffle when you call inquiries, then tells you to press '0' if you want to speak to an operator, but that number simply cuts you off! About 5 minutes later an assistant turned up and told me "Oh we dont take Amex", why couldn't the bloody talking machine tell me.
Last week I called a B.A number, as usual you have 6 choices, and do you what know? its always No6 you want, then another 5 or 6 choices, and guess what, yes its the last choice....................
So you press 6 and it says "We are sorry, we are closed until Monday"....why cant they tell you FIRST, morons.............
Scotfox said:
King Herald said:
Nobody in front of ME in the queue bothered telling me, even though three people had tried to use it before me. Selfish Lazy bds!!!
I've lost count of the number of times I've told people behind me there's no cash yet they still go ahead and try it for themselves !!ds!!!Edited by Scotfox on Friday 3rd July 11:32
and the fkwits at insurance companies, go through all the drivel with you then say, oh we cant insure you on a car like that - shirly you've had a quote remotely similar to mine you cockjockey, why not tell me before spending 15 mins of my money on the phone to you at a bd 0870 number when you know deep down that a 21 year old won't be insured on an impreza turbo with your company, complete twunts!!!!!!
kwits at insurance companies, go through all the drivel with you then say, oh we cant insure you on a car like that - shirly you've had a quote remotely similar to mine you cockjockey, why not tell me before spending 15 mins of my money on the phone to you at a bd 0870 number when you know deep down that a 21 year old won't be insured on an impreza turbo with your company, complete twunts!!!!!!
King Herald said:
I joined a queue to get some spendoolies from the Coop cash machine yesterday, waited my turn, as the people in front seemed to be faffing about.
So, I got to the front, card in, number, ****, screen popped up asking me if I wanted balance info, telephone top up or some other rubbish. Nowhere to ask for cash. I tried a few options, still no joy. I logged out, logged back in, fked about for another minute or two then gave up in fkin' disgust. It had no cash, but unlike every other ATM in the fkin' world this bd couldn't simply say that at the fkin' start, like "Sorry, No Cash Available", as they obviously hoped I'd spend some fkin' money topping up my fkstick mobile while I was there!!! fkin' bds trying to grab every fkin' cent they can even though they fkin' waste dozens of people time!!
No chance you can walk up, see there's no cash, got to another machine. oh no, these assholes want to do there best to possibly milk you for something you didn't really want. Like, oh, there's no fkin' cash, I'll fill my phone and check my balance seeing as I'm fkstting here and logged in alfkinready!!!!!!!
As I left I told the person behind that there's no cash in the machine, but the machine operator was too fkeyed greedy to be polite enough to explain that before you log in.
Nobody in front of ME in the queue bothered telling me, even though three people had tried to use it before me. Selfish Lazy bds!!!
It would appear that you didn't notice the big (normally GREEN) RED window on the machine that shows it's empty...... So, I got to the front, card in, number, ****, screen popped up asking me if I wanted balance info, telephone top up or some other rubbish. Nowhere to ask for cash. I tried a few options, still no joy. I logged out, logged back in, f
ked about for another minute or two then gave up in fkin' disgust. It had no cash, but unlike every other ATM in the fkin' world this bd couldn't simply say that at the fkin' start, like "Sorry, No Cash Available", as they obviously hoped I'd spend some fkin' money topping up my fkstick mobile while I was there!!! fkin' bds trying to grab every fkin' cent they can even though they fkin' waste dozens of people time!! No chance you can walk up, see there's no cash, got to another machine. oh no, these assholes want to do there best to possibly milk you for something you didn't really want. Like, oh, there's no f
kin' cash, I'll fill my phone and check my balance seeing as I'm fkstting here and logged in alfkinready!!!!!!!As I left I told the person behind that there's no cash in the machine, but the machine operator was too f
keyed greedy to be polite enough to explain that before you log in.Nobody in front of ME in the queue bothered telling me, even though three people had tried to use it before me. Selfish Lazy b
ds!!!
Edited by eccles on Friday 3rd July 16:06
eccles said:
King Herald said:
I joined a queue to get some spendoolies from the Coop cash machine yesterday, waited my turn, as the people in front seemed to be faffing about.
So, I got to the front, card in, number, ****, screen popped up asking me if I wanted balance info, telephone top up or some other rubbish. Nowhere to ask for cash. I tried a few options, still no joy. I logged out, logged back in, fked about for another minute or two then gave up in fkin' disgust. It had no cash, but unlike every other ATM in the fkin' world this bd couldn't simply say that at the fkin' start, like "Sorry, No Cash Available", as they obviously hoped I'd spend some fkin' money topping up my fkstick mobile while I was there!!! fkin' bds trying to grab every fkin' cent they can even though they fkin' waste dozens of people time!!
No chance you can walk up, see there's no cash, got to another machine. oh no, these assholes want to do there best to possibly milk you for something you didn't really want. Like, oh, there's no fkin' cash, I'll fill my phone and check my balance seeing as I'm fkstting here and logged in alfkinready!!!!!!!
As I left I told the person behind that there's no cash in the machine, but the machine operator was too fkeyed greedy to be polite enough to explain that before you log in.
Nobody in front of ME in the queue bothered telling me, even though three people had tried to use it before me. Selfish Lazy bds!!!
It would appear that you didn't notice the big (normally GREEN) RED window on the machine that shows it's empty...... So, I got to the front, card in, number, ****, screen popped up asking me if I wanted balance info, telephone top up or some other rubbish. Nowhere to ask for cash. I tried a few options, still no joy. I logged out, logged back in, f
ked about for another minute or two then gave up in fkin' disgust. It had no cash, but unlike every other ATM in the fkin' world this bd couldn't simply say that at the fkin' start, like "Sorry, No Cash Available", as they obviously hoped I'd spend some fkin' money topping up my fkstick mobile while I was there!!! fkin' bds trying to grab every fkin' cent they can even though they fkin' waste dozens of people time!! No chance you can walk up, see there's no cash, got to another machine. oh no, these assholes want to do there best to possibly milk you for something you didn't really want. Like, oh, there's no f
kin' cash, I'll fill my phone and check my balance seeing as I'm fkstting here and logged in alfkinready!!!!!!!As I left I told the person behind that there's no cash in the machine, but the machine operator was too f
keyed greedy to be polite enough to explain that before you log in.Nobody in front of ME in the queue bothered telling me, even though three people had tried to use it before me. Selfish Lazy b
ds!!!
I've used this machine several times, never noticed a green window anywhere. What I HAVE noticed on other machines is a 'SORRY, NO CASH AT PRESENT' plastered right across the centre of the screen. Nothing too subtle, just pretty f
kin' simple.Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff