Lilo Racing.

[ih8thisname]

Once again I call upon the wisdom of PH, this time it's because I have been challenged to a drag race to the end of the hotel pool and back.

Now, I've tactically chosen my steed, it looks like this;



and the two opposing lilo's are that of the thicker veriety with holes in them. You know the kind.

Bearing in mind I wiegh considerably more than the rest of the field and I'm not aloud to attach any kind of ourboard motor to the lilo, I look to PH for any useful hints or things to remember.

Naturally, I have to win.




TIA, Nick.

[10 Pence Short]

Have your fellow competitors killed. Or maimed. I suppose the result of the race would be tghe same either way. Unless by maiming you just loppeda finger or two. That just wouldn't do. I hate it when that happens and they still win the lilo race.

[JamesM]

Death or Glory.

Use it to keep your top half out the water like a speedboat and then just beast it with your legs. Push off from the wall and then fking go for it. Works for me.

Plus do what 10p said. Brutally beat your competitors and threaten them with an even greater hiding if you loose.

Edited by JamesM on Sunday 19th July 15:13

[thinfourth2]

I suppose you could fill it with expanding foam to create a stiff board which will be better hydrodynamics then a floppy lilo

[Eddh]

As already stated, push off from the wall and go like fk with the legs.

[[AJ]]

Wear flippers!

[WildCards]

Fill the Lilo with Helium and wear flippers.

Or, tether the lilo to your shorts/trunks and pull it behind you well out of the way, go hell for leather with the front crawl and you'll breeze it.

[stifler]

Kick with your hips not your knees.

Your arms are more powerful than your legs at propelling you in water. Keep your head down and straight, not looking up and moving about. After a good push-off, keep your weight neutral, too far forwards and you will "dig in" to the water, too far back and you will be causing too much drag.

If that doesn't work for you, knee-cap your opponents.

Stifler, Grade II swimming.

HTH

[Landlord]

Deflate the lilo and swim normally?

[10 Pence Short]

Employ a couple of your local jihadist asian gentlemen to blow up your swimming pool. If you do it on November 5th you also get free fireworks. You could have a barbeque and invite all the local youth groups. It'sd be right good way of helping community relations whilst sidestepping the whole race thing.

[P924]

as above and inflate lilo to 250 PSI

[ypauly]

If you go for the pink one you will not win, but may be reminded for many many years how nice your arse looked whilst trying to win.

[mybrainhurts]

(1) Let them go first...

(2) Depth charge...

(3) Off you go...

[Curry Burns]

I'm guessing your still in Greece then Nick


Unless its rained very heavily in the 'South' today

[Merry]

You need to get a lilo like you competitors. Yours will bend in the middle and thus by in the water more, making you slower, whereas the other type is stiffer when blown up and will sit on top of the water better.

In theory.

[Mafioso]

Disagree with the leg kicking approach.

I always find that using my arms one after the other in the water (if you're with me) is better and then roughly keeps the lilo level on the water so flows smoother over the surface.

That's my opinion anyway!

[mybrainhurts]

I think you need a rocket up your arse....

[ypauly]

mybrainhurts said:

I think you need a rocket up your arse....

I hate to say I told you so............



But



I told you so!

[Otto]

Mafioso said:

Disagree with the leg kicking approach.

I always find that using my arms one after the other in the water (if you're with me) is better and then roughly keeps the lilo level on the water so flows smoother over the surface.

That's my opinion anyway!

This is also my chosen method - lay flat on the lilo, not kicking with legs at all so as to keep the lilo as horizontal and flat as possible. Then a breast stroke action with the arms.

[2something]

Mafioso said:

Disagree with the leg kicking approach.

I always find that using my arms one after the other in the water (if you're with me) is better and then roughly keeps the lilo level on the water so flows smoother over the surface.

That's my opinion anyway!

I would do the same, use the lilo as a platform for front crawl and you'll be zipping along. Squeeze the lilo between your feet or knees (ooooh-errrr) to make sure you dont' slip off it and it doesn't move underneath you. If you can fold the head pillow part back for extra bouyancy at the front, all the better.