Present for a 70 year old man with no hobbies

[oldbanger]

I was going to get an F&M hamper but it seems I've left it too late (they need 5 working days), so can anyone suggest a decent birthday present for a grumpy 70 year old with few interests outside working and watching the 24 hour news channels. I'd rather not buy alcohol unless it's just part of a larger present. It needs to arrive by Saturday latest.

From experience, he hates the opera, doesn't read books much (only work related), loses pens, and breaks watches (we got him a watch for Christmas just gone anyway).

[rlw]

cocaine and a cheap hooker

[SimonV8ster]

Huge 'Y' fronts.

And some socks.

[E31Shrew]

A good quality DAB radio?

[Mexico.]

Spot on ^^ DAB Radio

[Steve748]

one of those drain training hand held game thingys

[E31Shrew]

Have a gander at www.vitaaudio.com

[oldbanger]

SimonV8ster said:

Huge 'Y' fronts.

And some socks.

My mother suggested a couple of Sainsburys shirts!

[jas xjr]

The 70 year old sounds like my dad . Last pressie I got him was a nice mobile phone. He did really like it too

[Cotty]

Can you still get those BIG slippers where you put both feet in.

[filthstreet]

Cotty said:

Can you still get those BIG slippers where you put both feet in.

For men??????????????????????????????

Edited by filthstreet on Monday 20th July 20:49

[Cotty]

Men don't get cold feet?

ps it was a joke

[Man-At-Arms]

skydiving

[Puggit]

Porn site subscription?

[Kiltie]

I saw this in the Sunday Times and thought it might be good for an elderly person.

Cheers,

Eric

[dodgyviper]

A laptop with hundreds of Favourite porn links already set up.

Easy present - just cut and paste

[mybrainhurts]

Edited by mybrainhurts on Wednesday 22 July 23:55

[swiftpete]

Get him an excellent selection of cheese and a bottle of good port.

[Art_Vandelay]

Ideal present artistic perfection.


Oh and just to add the funnies comment:

Amazon User said:

I recently purchased this poster, and while it's lifelike, well made and had a certain, portly charm to it, I have since found out that it's actually *cheaper* to hire Paul Ross to come over and stand against a wall, whenever you feel the need to look at him.

Or how about comfort wipe. I know I couldn't live without mine ...

[Airbag]

Art_Vandelay said:

Ideal present artistic perfection.


Oh and just to add the funnies comment:

Amazon User said:

I recently purchased this poster, and while it's lifelike, well made and had a certain, portly charm to it, I have since found out that it's actually *cheaper* to hire Paul Ross to come over and stand against a wall, whenever you feel the need to look at him.

Or how about comfort wipe. I know I couldn't live without mine ...

"If you only buy one 20 inch canvas print of Paul Ross this year, this is the one to get. "
Love it.