Self-service checkouts

[bogwoppit]

Does anyone else get wound up by these supposed "express" checkouts major stores are so keen on. Fair enough in Tesco if you are just buying a pint of milk, and no doubt it saves them cash. But today I discovered to my joy that B&Q have installed these. With no other checkouts open, on a Saturday afternoon. So there's me heaving bags of cement out the effin trolley so my wife can scan them (cable too short to reach in).

Surely B&Q is not the place to be having these things?? Stop being such money-grabbing twunts and employ some more teenagers! Every time I use them wherever they are I end up getting angry on an otherwise pleasant shopping trip, they just seem to have a way of treating you like an idiot despite not even being human. The item is already in the feckin bagging area you electronic tosspot!

Sorry, have been holding that one in all day. Am I alone in my hatred?

[percymk4]

they do speed things up to an extent, but worst thing ive found is when your buying more than say, 5 or 6 items, god-forbid you should take one of those items off the bagging area. Computer woman goes mental, screen tells you to put them back on, everyone in the shop thinks your trying to rob something, member of staff has to come along (if one is availiable), swipe their card, key in their I.D, check your bags, then you can continue.

pointless rant, but its early, and i need something to moan at.

Edited by percymk4 on Sunday 9th August 03:30

[wiffmaster]

Do what my old man does. Walk into the store, shop as normal, then politely ask them to open a checkout. 99% of the time they do so without kicking up a fuss. If they refuse and start moaning, he just leaves the trolley where it is and starts walking. So far they've always run after him and opened one pretty sharpish. His logic is that he's spending the money, the least they can do is make it easy for him to give it them!

It's not much to ask; if you're going to stay open, then it's really not great customer service to make it harder for the consumer to pay for the goods! Our local Tesco at night is the worst - there's always a couple of staff standing by the self-service checkouts in case anybody has a problem. No regular checkouts are open. Here's an idea - rather than standing around, waiting until the customers encounters a problem, how about you just open a till?

Edited by wiffmaster on Sunday 9th August 04:15

[Pigeon]

I hate the bloody things. Any job that could be done by a machine instead of a human should be done by a machine instead of a human - with the important caveat that it not be a st machine. They should make things quicker and easier but on the contrary all they do is make it slower and more awkward.

Why does the "bagging area" have to be at ankle height instead of being at table-top height like the rest of the machine is? You have to bend double for every single item you put through. Every individual item, because if you try and scan several smaller items from hand to hand to save hassle the bloody thing moans and bhes and stops working. End up spending more time bending over and standing up again than scanning. What is this, some sort of demented keep-fit initiative? Scan your food, touch your toes. Scan your food, touch your toes. Scan your food, touch your F U C K O F F will you.

And why is the voice on the thing so bloody loud? Stop BELLOWING CRAP at me you stupid machine, just shut the fk up and work without being so piss awkward about every single thing.

It's completely stupid in Tesco in the middle of the night. No proper tills open, but the stupid machines are, only one customer at a time using them... and a member of staff watching them. So why the fk doesn't the member of staff just switch the bloody things off and open a checkout?

They suck ass, big time.

[BMR]

I used one in B&Q the other day, it wasn't until I did everything I noticed the "Cash Payments Only" notice above it. There were another 3 machines which a member of staff helped me to like I was unable to. Thats the things with these they make you feel like a complete nob.

I also noticed there were no other tills open same as OP before long self service is all there will be.

I suppose it's another element in eradicting person to person communication. With these you can go into a shop, and buy something without ever needing to speak to someone. Providing the machine lets you. Soon Tescos etc will have robots to replenish the shelves for them.

[Silver993tt]

BMR said:

I suppose it's another element in eradicting person to person communication. With these you can go into a shop, and buy something without ever needing to speak to someone. Providing the machine lets you..

A bit like buying on the internet then really

[Jasandjules]

Now and again I give these a go if I'm in a supermarket and only buying a few things, but it really p***es me off that the thing keeps demanding I put stuff in the bag, no, I want to carry the french bread so it doesn't get damaged.

I've nearly got through them without needing assistance from the staff....... It is my aim to get through one without needing the help, just because no feckin' machine is going to beat me...

[Dogwatch]

Don't mind the automation so much as the complete lack of logic in the layout. 'Put your card in the slot' - there are slots and holes all over the thing for cards, coins, notes, change and anything else they can think of. No particular order, just wherever they can be fitted in.

[Nolar Dog]

I often find it's quicker to queue at the proper checkouts with my loaf of bread rather than wait for the self service machines.

I also prefer to exchange a cheery "Hi!" with the checkout operator rather than stand in silence and be told what to do by a machine.

[Art_Vandelay]

Unidentified item in baggage area! fk off, I know there is, its my wallet/drink/other item I've put down whilst paying. These really do wind me up. Mostly when some people who use them take an age to scan their items. The fact the machine tends to shout orders when I can clearly read what I'm supposed to do really annoys me. When using a regular checkout, the operator doesn't find it necessary to shout to get her message across so why should the machine.

Good idea, piss poor execution.

Edited by Art_Vandelay on Sunday 9th August 09:04

[siscar]

I love them, so few people use them there is normally one you can walk straight up to, scan stuff, put it on the platform (doesn't have to be in the bag), much quicker than queueing for a numpty.

[Taita]

The cocking baggage area winds me up good and proper.

And the VOLUME on the things, there are 6-8 of em at my local Tescos, and you can here them from the back of shop.

I would go spare if I had to stand and listen to THE REALLY LOUD fkING NOISE all day.

[MentalSarcasm]

Sometimes I use them but I'm starting to detest them. As a supermarket cashier I see them as direct competition

What really annoys me is that I'll go and stand in line for a proper checkout, one shopper finishing and another one in front of me with a few items, I won't have much shopping either, one of their staff will come up to me and go, "You can use the self-service checkouts for you items". Yes I know, I'm happy here thank you. "But you only have a few items and it will be a lot quicker for you." Not necessarily, I've had one of these things get pissed off with me before and waiting around for a staff member to unlock is definitely not quicker for me. "Would you like me to show you how to use it?" WHY CAN'T YOU JUST fk OFF AND SEE THAT I'M PERFECTLY HAPPY TO STAND HERE AND WAIT!? I'M BRITISH, WE KNOW HOW TO QUEUE, IT'S PRACTICALLY AN OLYMPIC SPORT FOR US FFS!

I should be able to decide where I get my items scanned without being harassed by staff. If I don't agree to move after the first few arguements then they stand there and stare at me until I move. And I can't be rude and walk out because I work in a supermarket so I know what it's like to have pissy customers, and chances are they've had the shop manager tell them to do this so it's not their fault.

Clearly it's not working though as my local one has just had to re-introduce two basket tills. You know, the ones that removed to make room for the self-scan ones. Methinks they've had one too many complaints.

Oh, and the they do the "guiding arm" thing, where they have one arm almost touching your back and the other pointing to where they want you to go. I just need to get up the courage to leap away going "Don't touch me! The dentist touched me! He did bad things!" and start crying.

[thinfourth2]

Thankfully i have never been near the ones in B&Q with a hammer otherwise i might get arrested for criminal damage

[stephen300o]

I don't like self-service. Not only is it unreliable, it also puts people out of work and is anti-social.

[Silver993tt]

stephen300o said:

I don't like self-service. Not only is it unreliable, it also puts people out of work and is anti-social.

That's not quite true. It employs many people in the development, testing and manufacture of the self-service equipment. That's not only hardware but also the complex software that goes with it.

I suppose you've never used the internet to buy/order anything (such as flights) because that also puts people in shops out of a job?

Edited by Silver993tt on Sunday 9th August 10:22

[chrisga]

Do I technically become a checkout employee myself if I'm using a self service checkout, if not shouldnt I get some money off? Next time I get asked to use one of the self service checkouts I might get my NI card out so they can mke a note and work out my tax code when they send my pay over....
I don't use the self service thingies on principle and have been known to queue behind a full trolley with a bottle of milk!
It amazes me, I dont have my own business but if I did my first rule would be that if someone wished to pay me for a product or service they should be able to do so as easily as possible.

[stephen300o]

Silver993tt said:

stephen300o said:

I don't like self-service. Not only is it unreliable, it also puts people out of work and is anti-social.

That's not quite true. It employs many people in the development, testing and manufacture of the self-service equipment. That's not only hardware but also the complex software that goes with it.

I suppose you've never used the internet to buy/order anything (such as flights) because that also puts people in shops out of a job?

Edited by Silver993tt on Sunday 9th August 10:22

The people put out of work at a checkout are generally not going to go into software development. But yes I am as hypocritical as the next man but still.

[i remember]

i find they are just too fking slow , i could be in and out in 30seconds but no its more like 30minutes

[zac510]

I am used to using these things at Asda but the other day I went to M&S to get a sandwich. Got to the payment stage and realised it is card only.. so used my card to buy a £1.35 sandwich. I felt like a real twit!