Reality Check?

[Taita]

Just making sure I am not a fking psycho.

I'm in the middle of doing a fair amount of training; running, loads of body weight stuff etc, all good. I'm running along a road, coming past the park and come to pass a bloke walking a dog. I shout 'Scuse me' when I'm a fair distance back, he turns round and waves and I go past.

His dog lollops after me (its between Terrier and Labrador size) and I glance back, he mooches along, then I hear him growling a bit and then sense something a bit off.

I shout back to the bloke 'Can you call your dog please' and receive a 'He won't hurt you, he's a softy' or something. I mutter to myself and carry on jogging. Then I start hearing a growl and feel a snapping at my ankles. Glance down and the wee thing is baring its teeth and snapping a bit. Try to ward him off by moving foot towards him to make a bit of space (probably not the best idea on reflection) and he keeps coming towards me, so I grab it with both hands and launch it over the fence and into the canal. Bloke then runs up flabbergasted and starts wailing about how I could do such a thing yadda yadda. Assume dog sorted itself out and swam to a bit that was easy to get out at.

I tell him to 'learn to control his fking dog' and go home. Ruined my run because it was a bit weird

The way I see it,
A) it's a dog - I love animals too, but in the scheme of things, it is below my ankles. I have an Army assessment coming up soon, can't afford any injury. He posed a risk, needed to get shut of it.
B) they can swim
C) put the fker on a lead in parks when people are mooching about
D) why did it just go bonkers? Pheromones from sweat (running?)
E) have I committed any offence? Apart from the to the owner . Any legislation to make owners not leg dogs run riot?

Both the missus and the landlady seem to consider me a child molester from the reaction I have received when I answered 'How was your run'.

Am I a fking mental?

[littlegreenfairy]

Perhaps you could have just restrained the dog (grabbed its collar) until the owner caught up and put it on a lead.

All I can hear in my head is the yelp of a dog followed by a big splash....

[Spiritual_Beggar]

"You destroyed the only thing I love. There, I said it. What do you love?"

"I love poetry, and a glass of scotch, and, of course, my friend Baxter here."

"Well, now, guess what, this is happening."

Edited by Spiritual_Beggar on Monday 10th August 20:32

[Taita]

Spiritual_Beggar said:

"You destroyed the only thing I love. There, I said it. What do you love?"

"I love poetry, and a glass of scotch, and, of course, my friend Baxter here."

"Well, now, guess what, this is happening."

Edited by Spiritual_Beggar on Monday 10th August 20:32

You've lost me.

[ipwn]

LMAO, reminds me that bit of Alan Partridge.

Me dog had eating me fags, so a threw him into the river....well it hit a rock first , something like that

[anonymous-user]

Spiritual_Beggar said:

"You destroyed the only thing I love. There, I said it. What do you love?"

"I love poetry, and a glass of scotch, and, of course, my friend Baxter here."

"Well, now, guess what, this is happening."

Edited by Spiritual_Beggar on Monday 10th August 20:32

"That's how I roll!"

Superb little story. Prepare for the hippies to come along and moan that it wasn't the dogs fault and it didn't know what it was doing.

Edited by anonymous-user on Monday 10th August 20:40

[DrTre]

I am so reminded of the Alan Partridge/Michael and the monkey exchange:

Alan: You must have got up to a few pranks in your time.

Michael: Wai-aye. Hey, I mind this one time, right. I was stationed out in Belize, right, and I had this little macaque monkey as a pet, right? And one day, I came back to my tent, right, and it’d eaten all my fags.

[Alan laughs.]

Michael: So I picked it up and I threw it into the sea.

[Alan’s face falls.]

Alan: You threw a monkey in the sea?

Michael: Well, it had eaten all my fags, man. It was a big packet of two-hundred duty-frees, like.

Alan: You threw a monkey in the sea? That’s awful. I mean, I was fishing for some sort of funny story. That’s just upsetting.

Michael: Well, you know, I wasn’t thinking straight. I just, kind of, got the red mist in front of my eyes and I just grabbed the monkey and hurled it in the sea.

Alan: Will you stop saying you threw your monkey in the sea? All I can see is a monkey spinning towards the water.

Michael: Well, it didn’t go straight in the water. It bounced off a rock.

[Taita]

There isn't any retarded 'assault on animal law' or 'causing distress to another MOP' thing I'm going to fall foul of am I?

I think I might go for another run later, in the other direction!

[Famous Graham]

Dogs can be very weird when you're retreating - contrary to all behaviour that the owner has witnessed, or is used to.

I was out in a local park in Reading a few years ago with my camera and there was a staffy and a boxer with their owners. Both were sweet as lambs, playful and fun and so on, as I took photos of them, ruffled their ears, made a fuss etc.

As soon as I said goodbye to the couple and started walking off, the staffy (no this isn't a condemnation of the breed, just it was that particular dog), started growling and following me. Before doing the same as your encounter, trying to bite my heals.

Dogs can swim - you did what was necessary imo.

Having had a chunk torn out of my thigh by a Jack Russell 2 months ago, I am now under no illusions about what you can or cannot do when a dog fancies a meal :/

(and no, I do not blame the dogs concerned at all)

Edited by Famous Graham on Monday 10th August 20:48

[GTIR]

Hmm interesting story.

I suggest you join the Royal Marines or Paras, you will fit right in.

[Taita]

GTIR said:

Hmm interesting story.

I suggest you join the Royal Marines or Paras, you will fit right in.

I am aiming to do exactly that. Have a selection for Para Regt in December.

[Scraggles]

beats kicking the dog in the face and stamping on it's head

after all dogs can swim and the owner should have heeded the op's warning

[jp1982]

I'm hoping next time you are out for a run, it's a chav that gets the canal treatment. Now that would be worth a ringside seat.

[swansea v6]

haha fking wish i had seen that!!!

[Jasandjules]

The owner has a duty not to have his dog "out of control" in a public place - if it's biting at you then it's out of control IMHO. At least you didn't (in theory) hurt it, save for it's pride.

A dog may well attack you as you run away because that's their instinct to chase, and attack from behind (same as a Lion/Tiger actually). If you are running and a dog starts to chase then you can stop, face it, and growl at it to show that you are not prey (but of course this f**ks up your run a touch)....

[OllieWinchester]

Were you wearing any hi-vis clothing? Some dogs seem to take a real dislike to that stuff. My Jack Russel doesn't seem to like joggers, wearing hi-vis or not, not really sure why.

[Tycho]

swansea v6 said:

haha fking wish i had seen that!!!

+1

P.S. you did the right thing IMO.

[Taita]

OllieWinchester said:

Were you wearing any hi-vis clothing? Some dogs seem to take a real dislike to that stuff. My Jack Russel doesn't seem to like joggers, wearing hi-vis or not, not really sure why.

No I'm not a raving faggot

[Penny-lope]

OMG you need to start wking again....far too much built up anger young man

How did the laser treatment go btw?

[Xenocide]

Haha no that's fine in my eyes... and my mind. I'm chuckling like a spastic licking an iced cream.

I forgot how good partridge is too, like.