M&S in H&S plastic fork off
Discussion
Finding ourselves enjoying an unusually tropical Saturday in Edinburgh we decided upon an impromptu picnic.
We gathered up some Marks & Spencers picnicy items; bread, cheese, salmon, fruit salad, strawberries and cream etc and headed to the checkout where we asked the whereabouts of picnic plastic cutlery to assist us in cutting, spreading and consuming the items in a sensible and polite manner.
"No" declares the be-aproned trunk of a woman. "We have no spoons and we're not allowed to offer our teeny weeny flimsy plastic knifes any longer"..... "for health and safety reasons"
We enquired if someone had been previously scratched or hurt, even KILLED by one of their teeny weeny flimsy plasticy knives which have been previously known to bend and snap upon the spreading of butter upon bread..... but they didn't know... they had heard that, once, a child flicked a grape at another using the knife as a catapault mechanism.... but no actual deaths....
So we cut with a fork, spread with a fork, and ate everything with a fork. Even the yoghurt. I like a challenge. Going to try their soup range for our next picnic.
Utterly absurd.
Has anyone known of a M&S miniature plasticy knife death?... or did someone at M&S just run out of things to risk assess.
We gathered up some Marks & Spencers picnicy items; bread, cheese, salmon, fruit salad, strawberries and cream etc and headed to the checkout where we asked the whereabouts of picnic plastic cutlery to assist us in cutting, spreading and consuming the items in a sensible and polite manner.
"No" declares the be-aproned trunk of a woman. "We have no spoons and we're not allowed to offer our teeny weeny flimsy plastic knifes any longer"..... "for health and safety reasons"
We enquired if someone had been previously scratched or hurt, even KILLED by one of their teeny weeny flimsy plasticy knives which have been previously known to bend and snap upon the spreading of butter upon bread..... but they didn't know... they had heard that, once, a child flicked a grape at another using the knife as a catapault mechanism.... but no actual deaths....
So we cut with a fork, spread with a fork, and ate everything with a fork. Even the yoghurt. I like a challenge. Going to try their soup range for our next picnic.
Utterly absurd.
Has anyone known of a M&S miniature plasticy knife death?... or did someone at M&S just run out of things to risk assess.
parakitaMol. said:
Or I could just fabricate a story from the weekend about drinking too much, going to sleazy places with sleazy people, sluts, fights and sex.
You're right Health & Safety absurdity has no place here.
I'll mail M&S and get to work on the lie.
Did you post your original post just so you could line up the second one? It's not like it was even Harry who replied.You're right Health & Safety absurdity has no place here.
I'll mail M&S and get to work on the lie.
I think you secretly have a thing for the Flash.
Funk said:
parakitaMol. said:
Or I could just fabricate a story from the weekend about drinking too much, going to sleazy places with sleazy people, sluts, fights and sex.
You're right Health & Safety absurdity has no place here.
I'll mail M&S and get to work on the lie.
Did you post your original post just so you could line up the second one? It's not like it was even Harry who replied.You're right Health & Safety absurdity has no place here.
I'll mail M&S and get to work on the lie.
I think you secretly have a thing for the Flash.
Sadly the M&S fork off is true. Picnic food handling issues just don't CUT it round here do they.
JJCW said:
Honest question, do you ever smile during the day?
You seem a very bitter person.
What a very odd thing to say on a story finding sheer amusement in the withdrawl of plastic cutlery...You seem a very bitter person.
Is
it because I don't punctuate everything with this that you're a bit confused?I sure am now.
That reminds me of the time last year (I may have started a thread on it) I went to Woolworth's with my seven year old Son to buy a water pistol. He chose one, I gave him the money to pay at the till, thinking it would make him feel all grown-up to buy it himself and I then waited outside for him.
He was told he couldn't buy said item (a small brightly coloured squirter that looked nothing like a 'pistol') because it was a 'firearm'.
He came to get me and I went to the till to pay, making a show of handing the deadly weapon to him. I think it is shocking that I was allowed to purchase such a thing without showing identification or undergoing a criminal records check.
You'll be happy to know, being a responsible person, I now have the squirter safely under lock and key so it cannot be used without supervision.
He was told he couldn't buy said item (a small brightly coloured squirter that looked nothing like a 'pistol') because it was a 'firearm'.
He came to get me and I went to the till to pay, making a show of handing the deadly weapon to him. I think it is shocking that I was allowed to purchase such a thing without showing identification or undergoing a criminal records check. You'll be happy to know, being a responsible person, I now have the squirter safely under lock and key so it cannot be used without supervision.
parakitaMol. said:
JJCW said:
Honest question, do you ever smile during the day?
You seem a very bitter person.
What a very odd thing to say on a story finding sheer amusement in the withdrawl of plastic cutlery...You seem a very bitter person.
Is
it because I don't punctuate everything with this that you're a bit confused?I sure am now.
That's the mental image i have right now.
You could have gone to a camping shop and bought.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Light-My-Fire-Spork-Spoon/...
SPORK
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Light-My-Fire-Spork-Spoon/...
SPORK
parakitaMol. said:
Or I could just fabricate a story from the weekend about drinking too much, going to sleazy places with sleazy people, sluts, fights and sex.
You're right Health & Safety absurdity has no place here.
I'll mail M&S and get to work on the lie.
I told you, you're not my type. Now please leave me alone, before I have to call the police.You're right Health & Safety absurdity has no place here.
I'll mail M&S and get to work on the lie.
Again.
Harry Flashman said:
parakitaMol. said:
Or I could just fabricate a story from the weekend about drinking too much, going to sleazy places with sleazy people, sluts, fights and sex.
You're right Health & Safety absurdity has no place here.
I'll mail M&S and get to work on the lie.
I told you, you're not my type. Now please leave me alone, before I have to call the police.You're right Health & Safety absurdity has no place here.
I'll mail M&S and get to work on the lie.
Again.
Did your boyfriend call you over?
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