Wet children don't die...

[HRG.]

My eldest will be home from school in a while and she will have had to cycle about three miles to get back. Now I'm fully expecting to see something akin to a drowned rat dripping all over my kitchen floor when she finally returns.

Now as a caring parent (well in my opinion anyway) I've ensured the heating is on and there will be plenty of piping hot water for a bath. In return for my loving preparations I fully expect a torrent of "I'm not doing that again/I hate you/cycling is bordering on child abuse" type comments.

Has anyone got any good comebacks as to why she won't actually die?

[sleep envy]

ask her if she thinks she'll be more or less wet walking back in the rain once you've confiscated her bike for answering back

[parakitaMol.]

Because she's got gills like a fish.

If she doesn't have gills... quickly rush to the shops, buy a very large fish (whole) and slip it over her her head and proudly declare "now you do..."

[HRG.]

Ask Ferris if they actually listen to me

[Don]

You can't drown in rain. You'd have to stand on your head and try to get it to go up your nose. And even then you'd lose your balance when you fell unconcious and you'd just wake up again.

This one from my mother: Well. If you die of a chill I'll know I shouldn't have made you do it.

Neitzsche: That which does not kill us makes us stronger.

[sleep envy]

does anyone?

[TheEnd]

Tell her she's not made of sugar.

[4nonymous]

Any particular reason she can't be dropped off by anyone out of interest?

Did you buy her weatherproof gear?

[HRG.]

parakitaMol. said:

Because she's got gills like a fish.

If she doesn't have gills... quickly rush to the shops, buy a very large fish (whole) and slip it over her her head and proudly declare "now you do..."

I'm not sure I want my daughter smelling of fish :-|

[sleep envy]

HRG. said:

I'm not sure I want my daughter smelling of fish :-

no, no and thrice no

bad man, bad man

[HRG.]

4nonymous said:

Any particular reason she can't be dropped off by anyone out of interest?

Did you buy her weatherproof gear?

Yes, she's old enough to start fending for herself. I could drop her off in the car but then she would become unfit and I would be setting her up for a slothful life.

She will cycle till she's old enough to bloody well driver herself

That said I could buy her some better waterproofs I suppose

[parakitaMol.]

HRG. said:

parakitaMol. said:

Because she's got gills like a fish.

If she doesn't have gills... quickly rush to the shops, buy a very large fish (whole) and slip it over her her head and proudly declare "now you do..."

I'm not sure I want my daughter smelling of fish :-

But it would be the funniest response and it would prevent future backchat.


2 for 1 Parakitamol brilliance.

[B Oeuf]

The human body is 95% water, so she's bhing about 5% getting wet anyway

[Cara van man]

Tell her there's lots of nasty, murdering rapists in Peterborough. (Which I've no doubt there is)

She'll cycle a bit faster next time.

[HRG.]

parakitaMol. said:

HRG. said:

parakitaMol. said:

Because she's got gills like a fish.

If she doesn't have gills... quickly rush to the shops, buy a very large fish (whole) and slip it over her her head and proudly declare "now you do..."

I'm not sure I want my daughter smelling of fish :-

But it would be the funniest response and it would prevent future backchat.


2 for 1 Parakitamol brilliance.

That would mean I have to go the supermarket, non? Then I end up wet too which is a bit of an own goal

[4nonymous]

HRG. said:

4nonymous said:

Any particular reason she can't be dropped off by anyone out of interest?

Did you buy her weatherproof gear?

Yes, she's old enough to start fending for herself. I could drop her off in the car but then she would become unfit and I would be setting her up for a slothful life.

Does she pay house rent too ?

[Twincharged]

Either:

- Evolution of the human race wouldn't have gone well if we all died from getting a bit wet

or:

- You're not the Wicked Witch of the West are you?

[Cactussed]

FFS, its a bit of rain.
I am sure most of us grew up walking and taking the bus to and from school, rain hail or shine.

[HRG.]

4nonymous said:

HRG. said:

4nonymous said:

Any particular reason she can't be dropped off by anyone out of interest?

Did you buy her weatherproof gear?

Yes, she's old enough to start fending for herself. I could drop her off in the car but then she would become unfit and I would be setting her up for a slothful life.

Does she pay house rent too ?

Not aged 11, no.

And I do like the water factoid

[bazh]

HRG. said:

4nonymous said:

HRG. said:

4nonymous said:

Any particular reason she can't be dropped off by anyone out of interest?

Did you buy her weatherproof gear?

Yes, she's old enough to start fending for herself. I could drop her off in the car but then she would become unfit and I would be setting her up for a slothful life.

Does she pay house rent too ?

Not aged 11, no.

And I do like the water factoid