And thats how the fight started
Discussion
Fight 1 - I rear-ended a car this morning. And you know how you sometimes just-get-sooo-stressed… and stuff that really isn't funny seems to be just that much funnier? Yeah, well, that's what happened to me at that very moment. So there we were alongside the road and slowly the driver gets out of his car . . . I could NOT believe my eyes . . . he was a DWARF! He storms over to my car as fast as his little legs could carry him, looks up at me and says very angrily, "I AM NOT HAPPY!" So, the situation being what it was, I looked down at him and said, "Well, which one are you then?" . . . and that's just about how and when the fight started.
Fight 2 - I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?" "Nah, she can order for herself."
And then the fight started...
Fight 3 - My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on the TV?'
I said, 'Dust.' And then the fight started...
Fight 4 - My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.' So, I bought her a scale. And then the fight started...
Fight 5 - When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a petrol station. And then the fight started...
Fight 6 - After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.' And then the fight started...
Fight 7 - My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion. I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up all those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' My wife said, 'My God! Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started...
Fight 2 - I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please." He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?" "Nah, she can order for herself."
And then the fight started...
Fight 3 - My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on the TV?'
I said, 'Dust.' And then the fight started...
Fight 4 - My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.' So, I bought her a scale. And then the fight started...
Fight 5 - When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive... so, I took her to a petrol station. And then the fight started...
Fight 6 - After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.' And then the fight started...
Fight 7 - My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion. I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up all those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' My wife said, 'My God! Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?' And then the fight started...
chimera40 said:
Fight 1 - I rear-ended a car this morning. And you know how you sometimes just-get-sooo-stressed… and stuff that really isn't funny seems to be just that much funnier? Yeah, well, that's what happened to me at that very moment. So there we were alongside the road and slowly the driver gets out of his car . . . I could NOT believe my eyes . . . he was a DWARF! He storms over to my car as fast as his little legs could carry him, looks up at me and says very angrily, "I AM NOT HAPPY!" So, the situation being what it was, I looked down at him and said, "Well, which one are you then?" . . . and that's just about how and when the fight started.
Please, please tell me you said "Oh, you must be Grumpy then?"ETA: I should have read that to the end shouldn't I?
Edited by Oakey on Sunday 8th November 17:30
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