Ex girl friend kids dilemma

[red rider]

I recently split with my gf of 2 years due to the fact that she definately wants a kid soon where as i dont think that i do, she is quite a bit younger than me, i am 50 i already have a teenage daughter from a previous marriage just the one and don`t really want to go all through the baby scenario again. Apart from that she is ideal its just the kids situation.
Have i done the right thing by calling the relationship off. or should i have said lets go for it, and be prepared to have another one??? bearing in mind that at my age i think its going to be pretty difficult to find another gf.
I am pulling my hair out here thinking about it what little i have left.
One minute i am thinking i should of gone for it, the other i think i must be fking nuts even to think of it.
Help guys please before i go literaly insane.

[dudleybloke]

it depends.

kids can be a burden but they can also give you a new lease of life.

[ErnestM]

For goodness sake don't pull your hair out at your age ...

...don't forget, as you have a teenage daughter, her feelings may enter into it as well.

...also, if your relationship's pivotal point (with the gf) revolves around your willingness to have a child, I would say walk away. You need more than that to base a relationship on.

Just my 0.02

[The Riddler]

Have a read of this: http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&a...

[Mattt]

A family member just had his first kid at the age of 50 - and seems to be enjoying it. They can synchronise afternoon naps

[Herbie58]

You've been there, done that and got the stroppy teenager to prove it. At your age isn't life supposed to be about new found freedom and selfish persuits after having done the responsible bit for 18 years?

My parents had a late child, and my mum constantly worries about his future should anything happen to them. I'd have a teenager on my hands!

[900T-R]

Herbie58 said:

My parents had a late child, and my mum constantly worries about his future should anything happen to them. I'd have a teenager on my hands!

Ah, I'm sure you'd do fine - you'd just have to keep him away from that rich1231 character or he'll be scarred for life though

[Piglet]

Don't write yourself off at 50 and don't stick with a relationship where you want other things.

Leave her to find someone who shares her life plan and move on with yours...

There will be other people out there for you, just relax and don't go looking!

[GTIR]

Kids at 50?

No.

Imagine the st the kid will get when "grandad" picks him/her from school.

Maybe your ex was just not the one.

[GSP]

SOd that... your 50, been with her 2 years, kick her out the door.

Probably a gold Digger

[aussiebruce]

remember when you turned 40 and that was sooo old and looking back now you'd wish to be 40 again?

Well it will be the same when you look back at 50 from 60.

Let her go if she wants kids. You still have a lot of years infront of you. Well qute a few anyway

[Timmy35]

Two things,

1) 50, there's lots of hyperactive 40 something totty for you to pull. It's nonsense that you'll find it hard to get another one. And if you want a younger one go to Thailand.

2) How on earth have you got to 50 and still need to post on here like a mooning teenager wanting advice?

Actually

3) Kids at 50.....are you mad?

[davido140]

You did the right thing Red. No question.

You might miss her a bit but you've been there and done that with the kiddie thing.

I had a son at 21, no longer with the mother. Every GF I've had since has been told NO to any more kids and has seen a couple leave because of my stubborness.

Got to the point where with my current GF when she asked if she could move in with me I said "sure, but on two conditions, dont ever expect we'll be getting married and I wont be having any more kids"

I wont let a womans biological clock bks up the plans I have for the rest of my life.

[Adam B]

davido140 said:

You did the right thing Red. No question.

You might miss her a bit but you've been there and done that with the kiddie thing.

I had a son at 21, no longer with the mother. Every GF I've had since has been told NO to any more kids and has seen a couple leave because of my stubborness.

Got to the point where with my current GF when she asked if she could move in with me I said "sure, but on two conditions, dont ever expect we'll be getting married and I wont be having any more kids"

I wont let a womans biological clock bks up the plans I have for the rest of my life.

how old are you now? would you go out with a woman who already had a kid?

Edited by Adam B on Thursday 18th February 10:21

[davido140]

Adam B said:

davido140 said:

You did the right thing Red. No question.

You might miss her a bit but you've been there and done that with the kiddie thing.

I had a son at 21, no longer with the mother. Every GF I've had since has been told NO to any more kids and has seen a couple leave because of my stubborness.

Got to the point where with my current GF when she asked if she could move in with me I said "sure, but on two conditions, dont ever expect we'll be getting married and I wont be having any more kids"

I wont let a womans biological clock bks up the plans I have for the rest of my life.

how old are you now? would you go out with a woman who already had a kid?

Edited by Adam B on Thursday 18th February 10:21

I'm 32, and yes I would (and have) gone out with women with kids of their own (although I'm planning on sticking with the current GF with any luck! )

It's been 5 years since I had a GF with kids of her own, I dont have any issue with multiple kids of roughly the same age, they'll all grow up together, and you can boot them out to work/university at roughly the same time!

It's having a 10+ year gap between kids I'm not keen on, almost like starting over again, I've no desire to go back to sleepless nights, stty nappies, vomit over my shoulder etc... Quite honestly I have no idea how people that have kids in the 30's or even 40's cope, kids (IMO) can be a lot of hard work and I dont think I could cope with the lack of sleep at my age! I'm glad I did it young when 3hrs sleep a night was a doddle.

I'm aiming to be retired about the time the boy goes to Uni, so I can fook off and become a middle aged ski-bum.

ETA I cant count, I was 22 when he was born! 21 when he was conceived!

Edited by davido140 on Thursday 18th February 10:32

[red rider]

Timmy35 said:

Two things,

1) 50, there's lots of hyperactive 40 something totty for you to pull. It's nonsense that you'll find it hard to get another one. And if you want a younger one go to Thailand.

2) How on earth have you got to 50 and still need to post on here like a mooning teenager wanting advice?

Actually

3) Kids at 50.....are you mad?

Oh dont worry i definately dont want another young gf again especially from Thailand, i have learnt my lesson over the kids issue, i might be 50 and sound like a moaning teenager however i`m not to sure whether my age makes a difference, its what goes through anyones mind when a relationship fails for what ever reason, wondering have i done the right thing or not.

[Timmy35]

red rider said:

wondering have i done the right thing or not.

Well you know the old adage. The best way to get over the last women is to get on top of the next one.

[Herbie58]

900T-R said:

Herbie58 said:

My parents had a late child, and my mum constantly worries about his future should anything happen to them. I'd have a teenager on my hands!

Ah, I'm sure you'd do fine - you'd just have to keep him away from that rich1231 character or he'll be scarred for life though

No, probably just armed with a rifle training it on the local chavs along with much encouragement

[900T-R]

[BoRED S2upid]

Think of the poor kids getting bullied in school when they are 10 your going to be retired. 15 - 18 bringing their girlfriends / boyfriends back home your nearly 70, not that they will be bringing them back home.