Let's write a poem!

[Kentish]

How about we have some fun putting a poem together?

I'll kick it off....


I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So, please help me write this poem of ours.
I guess being PH we could focus on cars.

Cut & paste it into your reply and continue the poem...

Edited by Kentish on Thursday 18th March 11:14

[V8mate]

There was an old lady from Bow

[10 Pence Short]

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

[bob1179]

I once had a little Rover,
Whose engine got colder and colder,
It then wouldn't start,
So I let out a little fart,
And wondered 'where's my tart with a heart'.



I'm crap at poems, ditties, etc.

[Kentish]

10 Pence Short said:

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

[bob1179]

10 Pence Short said:

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

Nice.

[V8mate]

Who broke down and needed a tow

[Kentish]

Thes are all very good but some are not growin' the poem

[bob1179]

V8mate said:

Who broke down and needed a tow

Her engine was rusty,

[V8mate]

V8mate said:

There was an old lady from Bow

bob1179 said:

V8mate said:

Who broke down and needed a tow

Her engine was rusty,

Her big ends quite crusty

[10 Pence Short]

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

There is only one name we all hoot,
When the sniff of D.I.Y is aboot.
With a whimper and whoop, the blood starts to shoot,
Emsman really should learn to depute!

Why not drop tools and act with aplomb,
Add your mucky picture to that Match.com,
it might not work out for you and the minger,
but at least you can say you've rumped a fat swinger

[Justayellowbadge]

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

There is only one name we all hoot,
When the sniff of D.I.Y is aboot.
With a whimper and whoop, the blood starts to shoot,
Emsman really should learn to depute!

Why not drop tools and act with aplomb,
Add your mucky picture to that Match.com,
it might not work out for you and the minger,
but at least you can say you've rumped a fat swinger

Or go to the lounge if you have a question
about your life and its lack of direction
Your marriage is st and your missus is leaving?
Or your fecking dog died and you can't stop grieving?

From the matters of heart to the angst of the teen
pour it all out, say what you mean
your tiny concerns are wounds that need licking
just don't come crying to me when you get a kicking.

[escargot]

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

There is only one name we all hoot,
When the sniff of D.I.Y is aboot.
With a whimper and whoop, the blood starts to shoot,
Emsman really should learn to depute!

Why not drop tools and act with aplomb,
Add your mucky picture to that Match.com,
it might not work out for you and the minger,
but at least you can say you've rumped a fat swinger

Or go to the lounge if you have a question
about your life and its lack of direction
Your marriage is st and your missus is leaving?
Or your fecking dog died and you can't stop grieving?

From the matters of heart to the angst of the teen
pour it all out, say what you mean
your tiny concerns are wounds that need licking
just don't come crying to me when you get a kicking.

But what about the daft squaddie, old Nick P?
I heard he likes it up the jacksie
Actually, that's slightly harsh, he only gives it
He's always been a fan of poking the st

Edited by escargot on Thursday 18th March 11:55

[Cara Van Man]

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

There is only one name we all hoot,
When the sniff of D.I.Y is aboot.
With a whimper and whoop, the blood starts to shoot,
Emsman really should learn to depute!

Why not drop tools and act with aplomb,
Add your mucky picture to that Match.com,
it might not work out for you and the minger,
but at least you can say you've rumped a fat swinger

Or go to the lounge if you have a question
about your life and its lack of direction
Your marriage is st and your missus is leaving?
Or your fecking dog died and you can't stop grieving?

From the matters of heart to the angst of the teen
pour it all out, say what you mean
your tiny concerns are wounds that need licking
just don't come crying to me when you get a kicking.

But what about the daft squaddie, old Nick P?
I heard he likes it up the jacksie
Actually, that's slightly harsh, he only gives it
He's always been a fan of poking the st

Talking of ghey, let's discuss young Phil,
Goes looking for rentboys and pays for his fill,
He parades as a snail when really a maggot,
That dirty, bum aids boy, Escargot the Faggot.

[Dakkon]

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

There is only one name we all hoot,
When the sniff of D.I.Y is aboot.
With a whimper and whoop, the blood starts to shoot,
Emsman really should learn to depute!

Why not drop tools and act with aplomb,
Add your mucky picture to that Match.com,
it might not work out for you and the minger,
but at least you can say you've rumped a fat swinger

Or go to the lounge if you have a question
about your life and its lack of direction
Your marriage is st and your missus is leaving?
Or your fecking dog died and you can't stop grieving?

From the matters of heart to the angst of the teen
pour it all out, say what you mean
your tiny concerns are wounds that need licking
just don't come crying to me when you get a kicking.

But what about the daft squaddie, old Nick P?
I heard he likes it up the jacksie
Actually, that's slightly harsh, he only gives it
He's always been a fan of poking the st

Talking of ghey, let's discuss young Phil,
Goes looking for rentboys and pays for his fill,
He parades as a snail when really a maggot,
That dirty, bum aids boy, Escargot the Faggot.

Cara Van Man is a funny old chap,
He talks about sex, oh the irony of that,
He ponders very hard whilst he strains on the bog,
Turns out he has had the same op as NolarDog.

Edited by Dakkon on Thursday 18th March 12:51

[Kentish]

Very good!

[gamefreaks]

A little poem I have written to show my deep aprication for the Labour Party.


T'was May 97 that the Tories did cave,
and let in came Labour with a cheer and a wave.
Back in those days when Blair had some hair,
promising Britain would be all-gay and fair.

They twiddled their thumbs and handed out moneies,
not to the workers, to immigrants and mummies.
They raided our pensions, sealed us in red-tape,
The taxpayer coughed up, you could say it was rape.

Then Blair-san met Bush, they looked for a fight,
The UN said 'No, it just isn't right'.
Say, fk the UN, Let's bomb Iraq,
Then we'll find someone else to attack.

The people grew sick of Blairs grinning face,
they told him, get out, do it post-haste.
fk this, you wkers, I'm stepping down,
I'll leave it to you, you tt, Mr Brown.

The new Scot in town was a one-eyed 'tard,
He found the running the economy was really quite hard,
He spent all our money, that stupid old bloke,
Its now all his fault the country's now broke.

They dragged him a'kicking an screaming they did,
To the Chilcot enquiry to find what he hid,
He lied through his teeth and made up a figure,
showed graphs and some slides to make it look bigger.

Edited by gamefreaks on Thursday 18th March 13:50

[escargot]

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

There is only one name we all hoot,
When the sniff of D.I.Y is aboot.
With a whimper and whoop, the blood starts to shoot,
Emsman really should learn to depute!

Why not drop tools and act with aplomb,
Add your mucky picture to that Match.com,
it might not work out for you and the minger,
but at least you can say you've rumped a fat swinger

Or go to the lounge if you have a question
about your life and its lack of direction
Your marriage is st and your missus is leaving?
Or your fecking dog died and you can't stop grieving?

From the matters of heart to the angst of the teen
pour it all out, say what you mean
your tiny concerns are wounds that need licking
just don't come crying to me when you get a kicking.

But what about the daft squaddie, old Nick P?
I heard he likes it up the jacksie
Actually, that's slightly harsh, he only gives it
He's always been a fan of poking the st

Talking of ghey, let's discuss young Phil,
Goes looking for rentboys and pays for his fill,
He parades as a snail when really a maggot,
That dirty, bum aids boy, Escargot the Faggot.

Cara Van Man is a funny old chap,
He talks about sex, oh the irony of that,
He ponders very hard whilst he strains on the bog,
Turns out he has had the same op as NolarDog.

Kentish may chuckle with childlike delight,
Really he knows this is all a pile of ste,
The list of cars in his profile is rather vast,
I'd rather he just fked off and took one for a blast.

[Cara Van Man]

I want to write a poem but I don't know how.
I can't rattle on about a sheep and a cow.
It's really much harder than you would think,
like writing a story in pen without ink.

So I gave up real quick and went to the pub
Then met a massuer who gave me a rub
Realised something that made me choke
It had a big cock and, was a bloke

There is only one name we all hoot,
When the sniff of D.I.Y is aboot.
With a whimper and whoop, the blood starts to shoot,
Emsman really should learn to depute!

Why not drop tools and act with aplomb,
Add your mucky picture to that Match.com,
it might not work out for you and the minger,
but at least you can say you've rumped a fat swinger

Or go to the lounge if you have a question
about your life and its lack of direction
Your marriage is st and your missus is leaving?
Or your fecking dog died and you can't stop grieving?

From the matters of heart to the angst of the teen
pour it all out, say what you mean
your tiny concerns are wounds that need licking
just don't come crying to me when you get a kicking.

But what about the daft squaddie, old Nick P?
I heard he likes it up the jacksie
Actually, that's slightly harsh, he only gives it
He's always been a fan of poking the st

Talking of ghey, let's discuss young Phil,
Goes looking for rentboys and pays for his fill,
He parades as a snail when really a maggot,
That dirty, bum aids boy, Escargot the Faggot.

Cara Van Man is a funny old chap,
He talks about sex, oh the irony of that,
He ponders very hard whilst he strains on the bog,
Turns out he has had the same op as NolarDog.

Kentish may chuckle with childlike delight,
Really he knows this is all a pile of ste,
The list of cars in his profile is rather vast,
I'd rather he just fked off and took one for a blast.

Dakkon the wierdo, writing libellous st,
Best watch his back, or I'll pay for a hit,
Oddly appears it is me he is stalking,
When his wife is at home taking CVMs porking.

Edited by Cara Van Man on Thursday 18th March 13:53

[escargot]

Cara Van Man said:

blah

Get editing cock-munch. I was first.