Relationship: At what point do you tell
Discussion
So... in light of that thread and my "Don't tell" attitude, comes this thread...
You are "seeing someone". Maybe it is a first date, maybe it's an ongoing thing. She/he might be "The One".
At what point do you confess to the skeletons in your closet?
Do you tell anything at all? If so, what do you deem "necessary" to tell?
I'm interested to know and would like a sensible/adult discussion without people resorting to insults and tired jokes.
You are "seeing someone". Maybe it is a first date, maybe it's an ongoing thing. She/he might be "The One".
At what point do you confess to the skeletons in your closet?
Do you tell anything at all? If so, what do you deem "necessary" to tell?
I'm interested to know and would like a sensible/adult discussion without people resorting to insults and tired jokes.
Rossay said:
Cute things, yeah, go for it.
w
king socks and punching ex girlfriends i'd leave for a while.
I think ND has something to tell that might be of more significance than any old ww
king socks and punching ex girlfriends i'd leave for a while.k sock. Oooh, maybe this could be my first WHOOSH!Edited to try and add something useful; its almost always better to tell things earlier than later. Holding things back causes all sorts of problems, and there is no reason not to tell if it is something that will need to be said anyway.
Edited by Jem Thompson on Wednesday 9th June 23:52
ND, I'd only deem it necessary to tell them something if it would bother you if they found out later on. As I'm sure you said on the other thread, "It's in the past", so what relevance does it have to the present moment. If your happy and the other person is happy then I don't see the problem.
Before tongues me ole mucker, before tongues.
When he leans in for a smooch (and somehow hasn't spotted your apple/stubble) then you lean back and place a careful hand to the chest and give a flicker of a smile. Look into his eyes and just tell him that there's something you need to tell him before things go further.
Really, it's only fair. Speaking as a guy, I'd want to know. I really would. Some guys will not mind and accept you for who you are, but some guys absolutely will not. What you want to make sure of is the guy who sticks his tongue down your throat knows who you are, and still wants you.
When he leans in for a smooch (and somehow hasn't spotted your apple/stubble) then you lean back and place a careful hand to the chest and give a flicker of a smile. Look into his eyes and just tell him that there's something you need to tell him before things go further.
Really, it's only fair. Speaking as a guy, I'd want to know. I really would. Some guys will not mind and accept you for who you are, but some guys absolutely will not. What you want to make sure of is the guy who sticks his tongue down your throat knows who you are, and still wants you.
Nolar Dog said:
captainzep said:
It rather depends on the skellington. N'est pas?
Well, yes. That's the point. What would you tell and what doesn't need telling?And we promise not to tell him or her any of the bad ones.
Really, we promise.
hornetrider said:
ook into his eyes and just tell him that there's something you need to tell him before things go further.
The situation is though, that (apparently, according to the good folk of PH) it is blatantly obvious I used to be a guy so I shouldn't need to tell.If they with me, they must know (it's that obvious apparently) so they must be happy with that...
That's why it being a big deal seems so contradictory to the argument on here.
I tell them after they smelt the cloth, they usually lay there and listen for a while 
I posted on another thread about a guy I knew snogging a bird he thought was a bird but wasn't, never saw him again after that night nor anyone in our circle, he vanished off the face of the earth however there was piss taking of epic proportions that night.
I posted on another thread about a guy I knew snogging a bird he thought was a bird but wasn't, never saw him again after that night nor anyone in our circle, he vanished off the face of the earth however there was piss taking of epic proportions that night.
Nolar Dog said:
captainzep said:
It rather depends on the skellington. N'est pas?
Well, yes. That's the point. What would you tell and what doesn't need telling?Holding information back from a loved one can be terminally damaging. For a long time Mrs Zep thought I was an enthusisatic lover. But she learned hard way that I was an epileptic who liked to have sex with the dodgy strip light on.
So I think its the inverse of what might feel comfortable. If you don't like them then lie. If you really do like them, honesty is the bedrock foundation.
Edited by captainzep on Thursday 10th June 00:19
Serious response this time.
As a chap, would I want to know? Without question yes and the sooner the better.
It would enable me to make clear decisions before getting heavily involved with possible heart wrenching consequences for all concerned.
Some guys will be able to look completely beyond it to the point that it's not even an issue and see you for you and some just won't be able too. Neither is right or wrong.
I sincerely hope your situation is the former.
Best of luck!
As a chap, would I want to know? Without question yes and the sooner the better.
It would enable me to make clear decisions before getting heavily involved with possible heart wrenching consequences for all concerned.
Some guys will be able to look completely beyond it to the point that it's not even an issue and see you for you and some just won't be able too. Neither is right or wrong.
I sincerely hope your situation is the former.
Best of luck!
Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff