Best Man Speech

[Scotslad]

Alright Folks

Im best man in a few weeks at my best mate's wedding.

Does anyone have any advice or tips? any good one liners to include?

What may also help if anyone has a copy of their speech I could have a wee look at to get some ideas?

Cheers folks

[PaulHogan]

Names removed to protect the guilty

"It is traditional for the best man to tell a little of the life of the groom that shows him in a slightly less than favorable light for the delectation of you all; but I was advised to keep the speech pure and simple, short and sweet. This of course is no problem as SHE is pure and sweet… and HE is short and simple"

[scz4]

My only tip is to keep it 100% original. Sure, use websites like www.thebestmanspeech.com to base your structure and get ideas, but don't use one liners, or at least not from the internet, make them up yourself.

For example.. my brother used to swim a lot for various clubs before he met his wife and got lazy... so I mentioned his past achievements, commending his swimming ability, went on to say how his downfall was drinking and girls, leading up to the punch line "but I've been assured by Emma he still maintains a good breast stroke to this day"

It's personal, original and still funny

Edited by scz4 on Wednesday 30th June 20:22

[ALY77]

I had three pregnant girls at the wedding breakfast when I was bestman.

Mentioned the groom had been forced to wear locked boxers (held up a pair with real padlocks on the front) since the proposal but I think he might have managed to copy the key and hand them round, could all holders hand them back, which was the cue for the three of them to waddle up and lay keys down in front of him and give him a wink.

Think that one went down best.

[71notout]

ALY77 said:

I had three pregnant girls at the wedding breakfast when I was bestman.

Mentioned the groom had been forced to wear locked boxers (held up a pair with real padlocks on the front) since the proposal but I think he might have managed to copy the key and hand them round, could all holders hand them back, which was the cue for the three of them to waddle up and lay keys down in front of him and give him a wink.

Think that one went down best.

Had something similar at my last mates wedding,

Best Man announced that, as they were now officially married, the groom could get his porn collection back.

Cue a few select boys walking up to the top table and laying down video/dvd cases.

[deevlash]

wish them all the best for their honeymoon in Wales
well, he said he was going to bang 'er all week?

[xtreme karting]

Good one to end with, you need help tho!

"I would like to say best wishes to blah and blah and wish them the best in the future and hope they have a great honeymoon in Wales (have someone you know shout out, "thought it was barbados they were going to?")
Oh really, John said he was going to bangor all week?!"

The way u tell them eh!!

[jaf01uk]

A small tip I got that made a difference was when writing down/printing out your speech do the different paragraphs different colours, it makes it so much easier when your already nervous to avoid embarrassing pauses while you find your place,
Gary

[scz4]

The other top tip I found was, stand behind your dining room table and read the speech out loud over and over again. This will give you much more confidence. Also ensures the text is the right size and you can actually glance down and read your speech when it's on the table (much better than holding it in hand). You'll find once you've done this a few times you'll actually know most of it without needing to focus on the bit of paper.

[71notout]

People say being a best man is like making love to the queen.

Everyone agrees it is a great honour, but noone wants to do it!