Entirely false 0-60 claims in person, give me your best
Entirely false 0-60 claims in person, give me your best
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seopher

Original Poster:

301 posts

212 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
Reading the Fiesta 1.25 thread made me remember a tall-tale from a few years ago which made me chuckle.

A friend of mine, known for talking complete bawlocks (we were 17 at the time) was bragging about his Dad's new car and the 0-60 time it had achieved.

4.7 seconds. They sat in the car with a stopwatch and timed the 0-60 and it came out at 4.7 seconds.

What was said car? No, it wasn't a Ferrari F355 it was a Vauxhall Corsa 1.6.

Now why anyone brags about a Corsa I'll never know, but there you have it. If you want a sub-five-second car then a 2001 Corsa is the way to go.

TuxRacer

13,928 posts

221 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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Only if the speedo gets to 60mph 30 seconds before the car does. Which perhaps isn't that unlikely.

kambites

71,482 posts

251 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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60kph? smile

Phil-CH

1,132 posts

294 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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Maybe he mixed up the rev counter with the speedometer? biggrin

mnkiboy

4,409 posts

196 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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I used to work with a guy who claimed he had his Renault Kangoo van (1.5 dci) up to 135mph on the M11.

I borrowed same van a few weeks later, and found it topped out at 95.

i also know a guy who's 1.8 Vecta does 90 in 2nd gear.

beergibbon

396 posts

224 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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Wife's boss trumping my talk about my fast car with his brand new 525d touring (about 3 years ago). 0-60 in 5.5 seconds. Excuse me?

TuxRacer

13,928 posts

221 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
beergibbon said:
Wife's boss trumping my talk about my fast car with his brand new 525d touring (about 3 years ago). 0-60 in 5.5 seconds. Excuse me?
Was it... nevermind getmecoat

GingerWizard

4,721 posts

228 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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my mates 1990's ish cav SRI did 60 in 5 secs and a ton in 9..... It was white which is the lightest (grams) paint colour apprently....

Simbu

1,914 posts

204 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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Ah yes, apparently a 1.9TDi Fabia VRs is quicker in-gear than a Porsche Boxster S! I know they're torquey engines but personally i struggle to believe it... rolleyes

MKGTI20VT

13 posts

195 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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Not quite the same but a very related topic, i was at a bbq last weekend and the DJ turned up in a 51 plate M3 convertable, managed to get a look at the clock, reading 94,000. Later that evening he told me it was worth £25,000.............I hope thats not what you paid for it!!

seopher

Original Poster:

301 posts

212 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
mnkiboy said:
I used to work with a guy who claimed he had his Renault Kangoo van (1.5 dci) up to 135mph on the M11.

I borrowed same van a few weeks later, and found it topped out at 95.

i also know a guy who's 1.8 Vecta does 90 in 2nd gear.
To be fair a "friend" of mine (ahem...) actually got a brand new 1.1 Peugeot 106 up to an indicated 117mph on a perfectly straight, flat bit of the M54 with no modifications beyond an induction kit.

Yes "he" was a complete spanner for modifying a 106, and the indicated speed won't be accurate, but there you go. True story!

Gad-Westy

16,582 posts

243 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
Simbu said:
Ah yes, apparently a 1.9TDi Fabia VRs is quicker in-gear than a Porsche Boxster S! I know they're torquey engines but personally i struggle to believe it... rolleyes
Quicker than boxster in the wrong gear

Mattt

16,664 posts

248 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
Simbu said:
Ah yes, apparently a 1.9TDi Fabia VRs is quicker in-gear than a Porsche Boxster S! I know they're torquey engines but personally i struggle to believe it... rolleyes
I love the diesel in-gear times comparisons.

"If I drive my slow disesal in the right gear for the rev range, and you drive your much faster petrol car at tickover, then I'll win".

seopher

Original Poster:

301 posts

212 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
Mattt said:
Simbu said:
Ah yes, apparently a 1.9TDi Fabia VRs is quicker in-gear than a Porsche Boxster S! I know they're torquey engines but personally i struggle to believe it... rolleyes
I love the diesel in-gear times comparisons.

"If I drive my slow disesal in the right gear for the rev range, and you drive your much faster petrol car at tickover, then I'll win".
I prefer it when the 1.9TDi crew get all bolshy on the dual carriageways against obviously quicker cars.

I love it when they overtake you and look over with a smug sense of self satisfaction "knowing" they've bested you. Aside from the fact you're invariably pootling along at 0.8leptons while they're giving their VAG a good thrashing.

(Also, mild innuendo giggles at 'giving their vag a good thrashing')

Ricky_M

6,618 posts

249 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
seopher said:
mnkiboy said:
I used to work with a guy who claimed he had his Renault Kangoo van (1.5 dci) up to 135mph on the M11.

I borrowed same van a few weeks later, and found it topped out at 95.

i also know a guy who's 1.8 Vecta does 90 in 2nd gear.
To be fair a "friend" of mine (ahem...) actually got a brand new 1.1 Peugeot 106 up to an indicated 117mph on a perfectly straight, flat bit of the M54 with no modifications beyond an induction kit.

Yes "he" was a complete spanner for modifying a 106, and the indicated speed won't be accurate, but there you go. True story!
That is odd, I had a friend with the same car, same mods and same claimed top speed

A boy I went to college with apparently had a 135mph Fiesta Zetec S....... And it was still pulling!

mnkiboy

4,409 posts

196 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
Ricky_M said:
seopher said:
mnkiboy said:
I used to work with a guy who claimed he had his Renault Kangoo van (1.5 dci) up to 135mph on the M11.

I borrowed same van a few weeks later, and found it topped out at 95.

i also know a guy who's 1.8 Vecta does 90 in 2nd gear.
To be fair a "friend" of mine (ahem...) actually got a brand new 1.1 Peugeot 106 up to an indicated 117mph on a perfectly straight, flat bit of the M54 with no modifications beyond an induction kit.

Yes "he" was a complete spanner for modifying a 106, and the indicated speed won't be accurate, but there you go. True story!
That is odd, I had a friend with the same car, same mods and same claimed top speed

A boy I went to college with apparently had a 135mph Fiesta Zetec S....... And it was still pulling!
I wonder how many of these guys have put lower profile tyres on their cars, and the speedo is now reading 10% over?

VeeTEC

1,573 posts

218 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
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A former acquaintance claimed his Suzuki Ignis sport would do 60 in 4.5s.

What's worse is his brown nosing, sycophantic, f*ckwit mate swore blind he'd seen it do it.

edit: I forgot about this one. A guy I used to work with claimed that his Rover 216 GTi would hit 60 in about 3 seconds. When I told him the actual time was probably more like 8 seconds (or more), he rebutted my claim with the following genius: "Ah, yes, that's what it takes to reach a 'holding' 60mph".

Whatever that was supposed to mean.

Edited by VeeTEC on Friday 23 July 11:23

300bhp/ton

41,030 posts

220 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
seopher said:
Reading the Fiesta 1.25 thread made me remember a tall-tale from a few years ago which made me chuckle.

A friend of mine, known for talking complete bawlocks (we were 17 at the time) was bragging about his Dad's new car and the 0-60 time it had achieved.

4.7 seconds. They sat in the car with a stopwatch and timed the 0-60 and it came out at 4.7 seconds.

What was said car? No, it wasn't a Ferrari F355 it was a Vauxhall Corsa 1.6.

Now why anyone brags about a Corsa I'll never know, but there you have it. If you want a sub-five-second car then a 2001 Corsa is the way to go.
That's quite good.

My nomination would be Evo and Autocar magazines. They both (as well as many others) seem fully unable to separate and distinguish between 0-60mph and 0-100km/h (0-62mph). And even in the same article they will use the same time to refer to both stats rolleyes

frosted

3,549 posts

207 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
If I would tell you my civic type r many moons ago, was touching 150 and still wanted to go a bit on the m6toll would you think I was lying ?

8400rpm

1,777 posts

197 months

Friday 23rd July 2010
quotequote all
beergibbon said:
Wife's boss trumping my talk about my fast car with his brand new 525d touring (about 3 years ago). 0-60 in 5.5 seconds. Excuse me?
Yea, worked with several guys in the past, who ALWAYS had to go one better.

Whenever they told stories there were either numerous pauses whilst thinking what to say, or said something without realising it was utter bullst. All in the name of being better.

Best bullst claim was a lad at college with a Rover 214, reckoned his car was faster than my mates Almera GTi, 0-60 in 6seconds, 140mph. OK mate.