Is she a failure?
Discussion
I have an ex who in conversation the other day said that:
a)She didn't stop smoking when she was having her second kid. Didn't want to even though her first kid was born seriously ill possibly through complications during the pregnancy.
b)Argues with her boyfriend all the time leading to instances of them not talking to each other for days/weeks on end. She claimed amazingly that she liked this.
My reaction was to tell her she should be ashamed and I had lost all respect for her. I simply couldn't see how someone could do that and not think of their kids.
In the case of the fighting she said it didn't affect the kids as they weren't very aggressive fights and after 5 years the silences only lasted a few days now!
And in both circumstances she said I had no right to criticise her as I had no idea of the circumstances or situation behind the events.
I can't see how there could be good circumstances for either though.
Am I wrong or am i just applying my already bad opinion of her and exaggerating these small incidents?
a)She didn't stop smoking when she was having her second kid. Didn't want to even though her first kid was born seriously ill possibly through complications during the pregnancy.
b)Argues with her boyfriend all the time leading to instances of them not talking to each other for days/weeks on end. She claimed amazingly that she liked this.
My reaction was to tell her she should be ashamed and I had lost all respect for her. I simply couldn't see how someone could do that and not think of their kids.
In the case of the fighting she said it didn't affect the kids as they weren't very aggressive fights and after 5 years the silences only lasted a few days now!
And in both circumstances she said I had no right to criticise her as I had no idea of the circumstances or situation behind the events.
I can't see how there could be good circumstances for either though.
Am I wrong or am i just applying my already bad opinion of her and exaggerating these small incidents?
h. Why woudl you keep in contact with her?
FFS the smoking nazis are out again.
My ex smoked (lightly) through all 3 pregnancies. Not her usual 20 a day or so, maybe 5 a day.
Can't see that it did any of the 3 kids any harm.
Now I'm not suggesting that 60 a day is a good thing or a target to achieve during pregnancy... but I do think people neeed some sense of realism here.
It's a bit like the speeding over-reaction of certain parts of the media where going at 75mph must be killing children and kittens somewhere in the surrounding countryside. Smoking a few tab does not a murderer or abuser make.
Anyways, I always said if it cuased a smaller baby it'd be easier to pass.
My ex smoked (lightly) through all 3 pregnancies. Not her usual 20 a day or so, maybe 5 a day.
Can't see that it did any of the 3 kids any harm.
Now I'm not suggesting that 60 a day is a good thing or a target to achieve during pregnancy... but I do think people neeed some sense of realism here.
It's a bit like the speeding over-reaction of certain parts of the media where going at 75mph must be killing children and kittens somewhere in the surrounding countryside. Smoking a few tab does not a murderer or abuser make.
Anyways, I always said if it cuased a smaller baby it'd be easier to pass.
What's the point in taking the risk? Just stop smoking, jeeze.
Like I said, 9 months of smoking could increase the chance of the baby having defects for their ENTIRE LIFE.
What's the point?
Quitting smoking only takes a week or 2 of misery anyway. You're a weak willed individual if you can't kick the habit.
Like I said, 9 months of smoking could increase the chance of the baby having defects for their ENTIRE LIFE.
What's the point?
Quitting smoking only takes a week or 2 of misery anyway. You're a weak willed individual if you can't kick the habit.
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