Disgusting neighbour.

[HBLC]

My next door neighbour is a woman of about 50 who lives by herself. She has a young German Shepherd that's quite out of control, always barking and slamming itself into her bedroom window anytime someone walks past her house. I've always known she's a bit odd, hearing stories about the state in which she left her last place. Apparently the caaaahncil had to get a team of cleaners in as there was dogst and piss in every room of the house, food left everywhere and just general filth.

She keeps herself to herself so I haven't seen any odd activities from her until this morning.


I looked out my window and she's in her garden clearing up dog poo. With her bare hands. It's been hammered it down last night so it's not solid dogst either (not that it makes it any less horrible). When she was done she just wiped her hands on her jeans.

I almost fking vomited. I'm sure there's no outside tap so she's gone in, used the door handle then used the handle of the tap before washing it off. If she did wash.

This isn't normal, right? Please tell me I haven't missed a new policy brought in that states all dog owners now have to clean up st with bare hands.


I just hope the opportunity for a handshake doesn't ever arise. I can either run away if it does or defecate into my own hands and start shouting ''WELL HOW DO YOU LIKE IT?!!!''.

[TuxRacer]

It's greener for the environment than using plastic bags.

[cal72]

You should go straight over there and knock on the door and tell her how you feel.She may invite you in for a cuppa.

Edited by cal72 on Friday 8th October 13:50

[HBLC]

cal72 said:

You should straight over there and knock on the door and tell her how you feel.She may invite you in for a cuppa.

Can't wait til she asks if I want one lump or two with my tea.

[oOTomOo]

With hygiene like that she'll probably be dead soon.. problem solved.

[southendpier]

I'd imagine the doggie helps her out when she gets one of her special menopausal hot itches between her thighs.

...actually I don't want to imagine that.

[cal72]

southendpier said:

I'd imagine the doggie helps her out when she gets one of her special menopausal hot itches between her thighs.

...actually I don't want to imagine that.

Thats fking disgusting. What sort of sick mind do you have

[southendpier]

cal72 said:

southendpier said:

I'd imagine the doggie helps her out when she gets one of her special menopausal hot itches between her thighs.

...actually I don't want to imagine that.

Thats fking disgusting. What sort of sick mind do you have

Do you want me to continue?

[jesta1865]

cal72 said:

southendpier said:

I'd imagine the doggie helps her out when she gets one of her special menopausal hot itches between her thighs.

...actually I don't want to imagine that.

Thats fking disgusting. What sort of sick mind do you have

its the water daahn our waay, makes you fink madd stuff

p.s. anyone got mind bleach?

[Great Pretender]

southendpier said:

cal72 said:

southendpier said:

I'd imagine the doggie helps her out when she gets one of her special menopausal hot itches between her thighs.

...actually I don't want to imagine that.

Thats fking disgusting. What sort of sick mind do you have

Do you want me to continue?

Yes please

[southendpier]

Great Pretender said:

southendpier said:

cal72 said:

southendpier said:

I'd imagine the doggie helps her out when she gets one of her special menopausal hot itches between her thighs.

...actually I don't want to imagine that.

Thats fking disgusting. What sort of sick mind do you have

Do you want me to continue?

Yes please

There were three dogs at the vet talking to each other when one says,"I chewed up all my masters shoes, and that's why I'm here, balls off".
The next dog said,"I peed on my masters $1,000 rug, balls off".
The next dog then coms in and say's,"My master is a female and she likes to clean house in the nude, so when she bent over to pick up something, I went for the ride of a life time!".
"And that's why you're here? Balls off?" asked the other dogs.

"No, I'm getting my nails clipped."

[Diablos-666]

She sounds like a right dirty bd, go and smash her back doors in...

[Rocksteadyeddie]

southendpier said:

cal72 said:

southendpier said:

I'd imagine the doggie helps her out when she gets one of her special menopausal hot itches between her thighs.

...actually I don't want to imagine that.

Thats fking disgusting. What sort of sick mind do you have

Do you want me to continue?

[Tiggsy]

oOTomOo said:

With hygiene like that she'll probably be dead soon.. problem solved.

Are you kidding? She'll have an immune system of a Rhino...she'll make 110!

[angusfaldo]

Or maybe she's suffering some kind of breakdown or dementia? Let's face it - it doesn't sound like the actions of someone who is all there.

[powwerr]

southendpier said:

cal72 said:

southendpier said:

I'd imagine the doggie helps her out when she gets one of her special menopausal hot itches between her thighs.

...actually I don't want to imagine that.

Thats fking disgusting. What sort of sick mind do you have

Do you want me to continue?

i do! i do! i do !

[Steamer]

1 dog, no cup

[ShadownINja]

HBLC said:

My next door neighbour

Agreed. I pray to God her job isn't nurse or cook.

Edited by ShadownINja on Friday 8th October 16:00

[Man-At-Arms]

Steamer said:

1 dog, no cup

[Nicholas Blair]

Worst but funniest thread for a long time