Fail

[PaulHogan]

I've just spent 10 minutes searching for my mobile phone and then thought I'll ring it from the house phone only to discover the phone is on silent/vibrate. How do I know it's on silent/vibrate rather than in the pub or lying in a gutter? Because the fker started vibrating in my pocket! Fail. Shame.

[Pints]

Edited by Pints on Saturday 9th October 23:12

[Mars]

^^^ Is that also fail or brilliantly-deliberate?

[Pints]

Mars said:

^^^ Is that also fail or brilliantly-deliberate?

So you saw what I did there?

[Uncle Fester]

Now phone your house phone from your mobile.

You’re probably in the right house, but we think you should check.

How sure are you that it really was your phone in your pocket?

When you hold it to your ear and it vibrates, do the rabbit ears tickle your tongue?

[becksW]

brilliant

[b2dan]

I spent 5 minutes the other week searching all my pockets, walking round the van, checking the ignition etc... for the van keys.

Then someone pointed out they were in my hand all along.

[lost in espace]

I closed the motorised (posh me you see) garage door with the plipper and put it in the car. It cannot be found again. Sod.

[GTIR]

My daughter lost her glasses and was very upset. I told her they are always in front of your nose, and they were.

She was wearing them.

Div.

[nammynake]

b2dan said:

I spent 5 minutes the other week searching all my pockets, walking round the van, checking the ignition etc... for the van keys.

Then someone pointed out they were in my hand all along.

Did a similar thing a while back, looking for a pen that I'd been using that morning. Realised after 10 minutes of searching that it was still in my hand. I've never put it down. DOH!

[andyroo]

I started up the car, then got out to lock the front door, panicked because I couldn't find my keys, searched about for ten minutes before remembering I'd just started up the car with them

[Jasandjules]

GTIR said:

My daughter lost her glasses and was very upset. I told her they are always in front of your nose, and they were.

She was wearing them.

Div.

Done that before, and I've had my contacts in and been searching for them... It takes a bit of time to work out that I must be wearing them as I can see.....

[Fabric 2.2]

I've managed to "lose" a pair of ear defenders I've been wearing at the time, albeit perched around my head, not my ears.

[bazking69]

I was looking for my glasses the other day for a few minutes until someone pointed out they were on my head. Fail indeed.

[Ricky_M]

I started looking for my van keys whilst driving said van!

I tried the ring the phone thing, using the phone I was trying to find!

Who says sleep deprivation has a negative effect on you!

[zollburgers]

I was going to nip to the shop and knew I had some change in my pocket. I took my wallet out and put it in my mouth so I could get all the change out. Realised I didn't have enough so then went back into my pocket to get my wallet as I had notes in it.

Then started panicking as my wallet wasn't in my pocket and started looking for it. I stopped looking when I realised I could actually see my wallet in my mouth.

[Ricky_M]

zollburgers said:

I was going to nip to the shop and knew I had some change in my pocket. I took my wallet out and put it in my mouth so I could get all the change out. Realised I didn't have enough so then went back into my pocket to get my wallet as I had notes in it.

Then started panicking as my wallet wasn't in my pocket and started looking for it. I stopped looking when I realised I could actually see my wallet in my mouth.

I often do something similar, walk into a shop with my wallet in my hand, start picking up items, check my pocket for my wallet, panic, start putting things back on the shelves, then realise it is already in my hand!

The best one was when I was lodging, my landlady shouted up to my room "Ricky, where is the milk and why is there a can of furniture polish in the fridge?"

[DickyC]

I was in Germany surrounded by embarrassingly fluent English speakers. In a lull in the conversation I said to one of them, "YOU SPEEEEK VEH-REH GOOOOOD ENG-GLISH." He said, "Yes, I'm American."

[Pints]

DickyC said:

I was in Germany surrounded by embarrassingly fluent English speakers. In a lull in the conversation I said to one of them, "YOU SPEEEEK VEH-REH GOOOOOD ENG-GLISH." He said, "Yes, I'm American."

To be fair, they speak American and not English.

[Snails]

I once lost my MP3 player, turns out it was in my pocket and I was listening to it