Anyone else feel sorry for paedophiles?

[Somewhatfoolish]

Obviously, I don't feel sorry for paedophiles who abuse children. Anyone who does is fked.

But law abiding, moral paedophiles... the ones that have urges, but don't abuse kids, don't downlaod kiddy porn, basically live a blameless life apart from their desires... that must be hell on earth. I can't imagine it, but I thought of a similar situation - imagine we weren't allowed to sleep with humans, could only sleep with barbed wire or something - and if you gave in and shagged a human or looked at human porn, another human being was tortured because of YOUR desires.

It's horrendous. I feel sorry for the buggers.

[Vvroom]

I think perhaps you should ask for this thread to be deleted ASAP

[Stick Legs]

I think you have an interesting point, but a strange way of putting it!

[y282]

aptly named.

[JonnyFive]

Stick Legs said:

I think you have an interesting point, but a strange way of putting it!

This.

I also don't agree with the media onslaught when it's not even proven.. The media can ruin lives big time.

There are obviously some who I think should be locked up for life or a quick shot of the deadly drug.

[Somewhatfoolish]

Vvroom said:

I think perhaps you should ask for this thread to be deleted ASAP

Why? It's a contentious subject but I think it's wise to raise this sort of thing occaisonally. It's very different to a thread like "who feels sorry for child molesters" or something. Unpleasant but at the same time we're only moral beings by considering the edge of morality from time to time.

Ultimately my belief is all humans who behave decently through their own volition, no matter what they *desire* (as opposed to want) to do, deserve some compassion.

[Vvroom]

Somewhatfoolish said:

Vvroom said:

I think perhaps you should ask for this thread to be deleted ASAP

Why? It's a contentious subject but I think it's wise to raise this sort of thing occaisonally. It's very different to a thread like "who feels sorry for child molesters" or something. Unpleasant but at the same time we're only moral beings by considering the edge of morality from time to time.

Ultimately my belief is all humans who behave decently through their own volition, no matter what they *desire* (as opposed to want) to do, deserve some compassion.

Because the natural extension of your argument is that you feel sorry for them because society will not let them sleep with children.

Do you also feel sorry for those who want to murder someone but don't?

I'm all for having a debate about contentious issues but shine a light-not this.

[y282]

i think the reason your question is contentious is that unlike most lifestyle/fetish choices, paedophilia has little or no regard for consent. this is the main drive behind people finding it abhorrent.

[Efbe]

tbh paedophilia is not "underage" girls, its 12 years old and under. ephebophilia is attraction to 13-15 year olds.

ephebophilia is a bit more contentious, because most countries have different attitudes towards the age of consent.

I also think you'll find paedophilia is far far more common than anyone admits to, it always has been. It has been suggested that it can be caused by society blocking young males from seeing naked females. the idea being that they have not psychologically developed as they should have, so they base their own attraction and affections on people more vulnerable and easier to get in contact with. hence young girls/boys.

Not that I agree with any of this, its just theory.


edit: it is also quite telling how aggravated people get after the OP has asked this question. he is not condoning it at all, or suggesting in any way it is okay.

Edited by Efbe on Tuesday 11th January 20:18

[Somewhatfoolish]

Vvroom said:

Somewhatfoolish said:

Vvroom said:

I think perhaps you should ask for this thread to be deleted ASAP

Why? It's a contentious subject but I think it's wise to raise this sort of thing occaisonally. It's very different to a thread like "who feels sorry for child molesters" or something. Unpleasant but at the same time we're only moral beings by considering the edge of morality from time to time.

Ultimately my belief is all humans who behave decently through their own volition, no matter what they *desire* (as opposed to want) to do, deserve some compassion.

Because the natural extension of your argument is that you feel sorry for them because society will not let them sleep with children.

Do you also feel sorry for those who want to murder someone but don't?

I'm all for having a debate about contentious issues but shine a light-not this.

whoahhhhhhh

No, that is absolutely not my arguement.

My arguement - and it isn't an arguement, actually, just a statement of fact - is that I feel sorry for them because they have a base desire at the level of sex drive to do something that they know is morally wrong. That has to be a horrible life to live.

That certainly shouldn't be taken as meaning that society should allow them to.

As for the murdering example - if someone a desire to murder as strong as their sex drive, and yet was able to restrain themselves - yes, of course I would feel sorry for them.

[Rubin215]

Vvroom said:

Do you also feel sorry for those who want to murder someone but don't?

I'm all for having a debate about contentious issues but shine a light-not this.

I have seriously contemplated murdering someone several years ago now.

The full thing; method, body disposal, alibi, the lot.

But I didn't.

Does that mean I should be shunned as well?

[adycav]

Somewhatfoolish said:

It's a contentious subject but I think it's wise to raise this sort of thing occasionally.

I agree with you in principle.

However you have to consider who you raise the subject with, as many people demonstrate a typical knee-jerk reaction of disgust to the subject matter.

[Efbe]

adycav said:

Somewhatfoolish said:

It's a contentious subject but I think it's wise to raise this sort of thing occasionally.

I agree with you in principle.

However you have to consider who you raise the subject with, as many people demonstrate a typical knee-jerk reaction of disgust to the subject matter.

agreed, as you can see by some of the posters above.

just 'not talking about it' leads to a whole host of other issues imo.

[adycav]

Efbe said:

adycav said:

Somewhatfoolish said:

It's a contentious subject but I think it's wise to raise this sort of thing occasionally.

I agree with you in principle.

However you have to consider who you raise the subject with, as many people demonstrate a typical knee-jerk reaction of disgust to the subject matter.

agreed, as you can see by some of the posters above.

just 'not talking about it' leads to a whole host of other issues imo.

Agreed.

Your posts contain much sense Efbe, do you have experience of working with sex offenders?

[Somewhatfoolish]

adycav said:

Somewhatfoolish said:

It's a contentious subject but I think it's wise to raise this sort of thing occasionally.

I agree with you in principle.

However you have to consider who you raise the subject with, as many people demonstrate a typical knee-jerk reaction of disgust to the subject matter.

Yup, that's why I tried to word it sensibly (and put it in SP&L) - but on rereading first sentence seems to be ambiguous. Nevertheless the guy that basically called me a paedophile worried me a lot, seems more sensible people are here now but I'm actually shaking a bit - my real identity is not hard to work out, in fact it may be explicitly stated here, it certainly is on other websites, and that's not the kind of thing you want attached to your name.

Oddly though, in a way that means it's more important to make this kind of post occasionally. To protect other people as daft as me

[Faust66]

Ill advised post mate.

I can see your point about not giving into urges etc, but the vast majority of people out there have urges to cheat on their other half, get pissed when they have work the next day or even boot it and do stupid speeds on the road.

The point is most *reasonable* adults understand the concept of self control - obviously (in my opinion) there is something very wrong with people who find children sexually attractive, but they have too show some damn restraint. There's a VERY foxy lass at my work who seems to 'like' me, but I'm not gonna cheat on my missus.

See, control. It can be done.

Show some restraint & control you deviant fkheads.

Now, there is a difference between some who wants to have sex with young kids and a bloke who sleeps with a lass who's 2 months shy of her 16th birthday.

But how anyone could view a young child as a sexual being is a mystery to me.

[Vvroom]

Rubin215 said:

Vvroom said:

Do you also feel sorry for those who want to murder someone but don't?

I'm all for having a debate about contentious issues but shine a light-not this.

I have seriously contemplated murdering someone several years ago now.

The full thing; method, body disposal, alibi, the lot.

But I didn't.

Does that mean I should be shunned as well?

Not a single post thus far has mentioned 'shunning'.

The question is whether to feel sorry for these people or not.

[ChrisNeil]

If people are going to give a knee-jerk reaction, then I would argue that they are the ones with a problem not the OP. What is it about paedophilia that makes smart posters suddenly lose their intelligence and enter a fit of rage. Suddenly, anyone who doesn't accuse the OP of being sick, or who bothers to read and think about what they had to say, is themselves a paedophile.

I haven't read one decent response yet that's answered the question. He's not condoning paedophilia, he's saying we should sympathise with those who have urges but refuse to act on them. These are people who DO NOT abuse people, so there is nothing "sick" going on. The fact that they feel the way they do is not their fault at all, so why should we hate them for it?

[Vvroom]

Somewhatfoolish said:

adycav said:

Somewhatfoolish said:

It's a contentious subject but I think it's wise to raise this sort of thing occasionally.

I agree with you in principle.

However you have to consider who you raise the subject with, as many people demonstrate a typical knee-jerk reaction of disgust to the subject matter.

Yup, that's why I tried to word it sensibly (and put it in SP&L) - but on rereading first sentence seems to be ambiguous. Nevertheless the guy that basically called me a paedophile worried me a lot, seems more sensible people are here now but I'm actually shaking a bit - my real identity is not hard to work out, in fact it may be explicitly stated here, it certainly is on other websites, and that's not the kind of thing you want attached to your name.

Oddly though, in a way that means it's more important to make this kind of post occasionally. To protect other people as daft as me

Faust66 is bang on- ill advised post. That's all I meant. You shouldn't have been called a paedophile, you were making a point. I get that. I disagree with your point, but that's the nature of things isn't it.

Come on, we've seen people ripped to shreds on here recently for much much less.

[ChrisNeil]

Vvroom, I accept your analogy of someone who wishes to commit murder but chooses not to. In fact it is the same situation. They suffer a strong impulse, yet choose not to carry it out in spite of this. There is nothing sick about this, it is highly commendable.