There's a bird in the house

[DeputyDawg]

Not having a cowling on the chimney stack and the inevitable has happened today.

A bloody pigeon has somehow fell down the chimney and ended up in our fire place (unlit).
I'm at work and have a frantic missus who has now locked herself in the bedroom after hearing it flapping around.
Hmmm anyone got any bright ideas on how to catch a pigeon?

[Cock Womble 7]

DeputyDawg said:

A bloody pigeon has somehow fell down the chimney

"Fallen". Somehow fallen down the chimbley.

[Shaw Tarse]

Call Dick Dastardly

[Fossilface]

Trail of bits of bread to nearest door/window. ^^^^^ FLOL! ^^^^^^^

[Pints]

Cock Womble 7 said:

DeputyDawg said:

A bloody pigeon has somehow fell down the chimney

"Fallen". Somehow fallen down the chimbley.

I think we can let that one pass as a typo of sorts.

[Cock Womble 7]

DeputyDawg said:

Hmmm anyone got any bright ideas on how to catch a pigeon?

I had one in my bathroom last year. This is the method I employed to get rid of it:

Enter bathroom
Grasp pigeon firmly in both hands
Walk to back door
Release pigeon

[Big Rod]

Used to have to catch my budgie, (years ago), by throwing a tea towel over it while it was in flight.

You could maybe try a bath sheet.

[ChristophStone]

Baseball bat.

[DeputyDawg]

Looks like I have to leave work early and deal with it.

The other half will not come out of the bedroom and our two cats are nowhere to be seen. I dread to see the mess if the cats do make an appearance.

[Cock Womble 7]

DeputyDawg said:

The other half will not come out of the bedroom

Tell her to man the fk up.

Honestly, my Nan would have wrung its neck and had it in a pie by now.

[Chrisw666]

DeputyDawg said:

The other half will not come out of the bedroom

Forget the pigeon and make the most of it.

[Marf]

Shaw Tarse said:

Call Dick Dastardly

[louiebaby]

Get a big old towel, throw it over the bird.

The bird thinks it's night, so calms down.

Scoop it it and chuck it outside.

Go back to work.

[TotalControl]

Shaw Tarse said:

Call Dick Dastardly

[RemainAllHoof]

louiebaby said:

Get a big old towel, throw it over the bird.

The bird thinks it's night, so calms down.

Scoop it it and chuck it outside.

Go back to work.

Women generally don't calm down that easily. Oh, you meant the pigeon.

[DeputyDawg]

louiebaby said:

Get a big old towel, throw it over the bird.

The bird thinks it's night, so calms down.

Scoop it it and chuck it outside.

Go back to work.

I would but I work 50 miles away in Reading...oh well, excuse to leave early.

[DeputyDawg]

RemainAllHoof said:

Women generally don't calm down that easily. Oh, you meant the pigeon.

[Eric Mc]

[anonymous-user]

an owl came down ours once.

[DeputyDawg]

Just rang our next door neighbours but its a house full of women and they are all too chicken to go in pigeon hunting too. But...my neighbour the other side is also at home (thankfully) so he's kindly going in to do the deed! (collect the pigeon that is)