Any family members you hate?
Discussion
My wife said "My brother and xxxx (his wife) will also be at my parents so we will just have to grin and bear it. Just say nothing, I know it's not ideal."
These two do not have children live well abroad and on the occasions we get together never ask questions or talk to my 10 and 12 year olds. They completely ignore them. They lack irony, they lack self deprecating humour. They have a superiority complex and are miserable company. Conversation is stilted to the point of silence. They are sooo mature and old before their time and that's disrespectful to fun grandparents.
Anyway. I survived, stayed one night and went home because of 'work'. Thanks to my lovely wife for allowing me to escape and sparing me.
These two do not have children live well abroad and on the occasions we get together never ask questions or talk to my 10 and 12 year olds. They completely ignore them. They lack irony, they lack self deprecating humour. They have a superiority complex and are miserable company. Conversation is stilted to the point of silence. They are sooo mature and old before their time and that's disrespectful to fun grandparents.
Anyway. I survived, stayed one night and went home because of 'work'. Thanks to my lovely wife for allowing me to escape and sparing me.
techiedave said:
I like Franks posts and I suspect many others do.
In case you wish to come back with some disparaging remark about my tastes then I will understand.
I am a very understanding person you see
Thank you Dave, it’s appreciated.In case you wish to come back with some disparaging remark about my tastes then I will understand.
I am a very understanding person you see
I don’t deliberately set out to annoy anyone with my posts, but it’s patently clear that not everyone on PH is a member of the Frank7 fan club.
One thing I could point out to John, is that I don’t seek out Michelin starred restaurants, as I posted last Saturday, I don’t count stars, or even care if a restaurant has one or none, I just prefer good, clean places, preferably with tablecloths, that serve good food.
I just type whatever comes into my head, perhaps I should employ a filter.
If I mentioned that I was drinking black coffee and a cognac in Jersey, it was probably to set the scene for whatever I was talking about, coffee and cognac is hardly a mark of an arriviste.
One thing’s for sure, although I use the word petrol a lot, I’ll still tell my wife to ease off the gas when she’s doing 90 plus on the M2, she knows what I mean.
In addition, I’ll defend her to the death when she says to wait staff, “I’ll take the pork please, easy on the apple sauce, thanks.”
They know that she has no intention of going to the kitchen, and TAKING it, they understand that that is what she wants to eat.
Anyone who has a conniption, overhearing someone say, “Can I get some more ice in my drink please?”, needs to take a long look at themselves, IMO.
I don’t hate any of my family but I appreciate I’m lucky, all of us get on and always have. I come from a very large family, Mum’s one of four, and her two brothers and sister have two or three children each and dads one of three, with his two brothers both having two children each, and with my brothers and sisters I’m one of six. I’ve got eleven cousins, most of whom have their own children now too and we all get on with no arguments or arseh
s. We’ve just had our last Christmas get together last night (30th) as it takes us that long to catch up getting round to everyone. We don’t seem to attract losers and drunks etc as a family, even cousins husbands/wives and their families seem to be normal. Sorry to derail your hatred at Christmas thread but just thought I’d put my two pennies worth in!
s. We’ve just had our last Christmas get together last night (30th) as it takes us that long to catch up getting round to everyone. We don’t seem to attract losers and drunks etc as a family, even cousins husbands/wives and their families seem to be normal. Sorry to derail your hatred at Christmas thread but just thought I’d put my two pennies worth in!Edited by Aitch H on Tuesday 31st December 13:15
My so called brother, who was married to my wife's sister. He claims to be a Christian and has a high position in the Church. My sister in law has had to fork out tens of thousands of pounds to pay his tax bills, which she never got any of that money back. Before their marriage he signed a prenup which said he would not claim for any of the house, if a divorce happened, because my sister-in-law's first husband paid for that house, when they split, on the condition that the house would be given to their children. After a few violent attacks, by the ''christian'' including trying to choke his wife, bruising his step daughters arms, a divorce happened and the f...ing gobste hired a smart arsed solicitor and put a claim in for half of the house, which he got!!!! My sister-in-law had to move out of the house, take out a crippling bank loan to pay the gobste and now he can't understand why his son doesn't want anything to do with him.......
te hired a smart arsed solicitor and put a claim in for half of the house, which he got!!!! My sister-in-law had to move out of the house, take out a crippling bank loan to pay the gobste and now he can't understand why his son doesn't want anything to do with him.......I don’t hate my wife’s brother, but we are diametrically opposed on a world of things.
e.g., I read a lot, usually broadsheet newspapers, and watch news channels, both U.K. and French.
He buys The Sun every day, but only reads the sport and racing pages.
Nothing wrong in that, that’s his prerogative, but if you said to him, “That’s very bad in Australia, isn’t it?”, he’d probably have no idea that there’s been bush fires raging there for months.
One of his daughters said that she was thinking of going to Paris for a couple of days with two friends, then renting a car and driving down to Provence, but told him that I’d said that due to the strikes and unrest right now, that might be worth putting on the back burner.
He said to her, “Strikes? What strikes?, Uncle Frank is winding you up as usual.”
He comes to our house, commandeers the TV remote, and we’re regaled with merde on a loop, re-runs of Fools and Horses, Pointless, (how apt), Tipping Point, football, snooker, darts, DARTS FFS!, cricket, horse racing, (which he’ll insist on recording, to watch again).
If I object, my wife flies to his defence, like a she bear whose cub has been threatened.
He moved to the boonies about six months ago, and my wife now informs me that his old local team is playing on Friday, so he’ll get a train up, and stay overnight.
I finally put my foot down, “Nicky, you know that I love you to bits, but this is our house, not mine, ours, and I am NOT, repeat NOT, going to let him dictate what we watch while he’s here.
If he wants to watch racing, let him walk over to a betting shop, and I’m not going to sit here seething while he watches interminable mind numbing crap.
He can watch The Andrew Neil Show, Politics Live, France 24, or Al Jazeera, with me, or he can go find a pub that’s showing darts or snooker, and I will NOT back down.”
e.g., I read a lot, usually broadsheet newspapers, and watch news channels, both U.K. and French.
He buys The Sun every day, but only reads the sport and racing pages.
Nothing wrong in that, that’s his prerogative, but if you said to him, “That’s very bad in Australia, isn’t it?”, he’d probably have no idea that there’s been bush fires raging there for months.
One of his daughters said that she was thinking of going to Paris for a couple of days with two friends, then renting a car and driving down to Provence, but told him that I’d said that due to the strikes and unrest right now, that might be worth putting on the back burner.
He said to her, “Strikes? What strikes?, Uncle Frank is winding you up as usual.”
He comes to our house, commandeers the TV remote, and we’re regaled with merde on a loop, re-runs of Fools and Horses, Pointless, (how apt), Tipping Point, football, snooker, darts, DARTS FFS!, cricket, horse racing, (which he’ll insist on recording, to watch again).
If I object, my wife flies to his defence, like a she bear whose cub has been threatened.
He moved to the boonies about six months ago, and my wife now informs me that his old local team is playing on Friday, so he’ll get a train up, and stay overnight.
I finally put my foot down, “Nicky, you know that I love you to bits, but this is our house, not mine, ours, and I am NOT, repeat NOT, going to let him dictate what we watch while he’s here.
If he wants to watch racing, let him walk over to a betting shop, and I’m not going to sit here seething while he watches interminable mind numbing crap.
He can watch The Andrew Neil Show, Politics Live, France 24, or Al Jazeera, with me, or he can go find a pub that’s showing darts or snooker, and I will NOT back down.”
Frank7 said:
He comes to our house, commandeers the TV remote, and we’re regaled with merde on a loop, re-runs of Fools and Horses, Pointless, (how apt), Tipping Point, football, snooker, darts, DARTS FFS!, cricket, horse racing, (which he’ll insist on recording, to watch again).
I have an occasional house guest who insists on watching real TV. It makes me feel funny in my tummy having to sit through ads and trails. Second mother (adopted at an early age). Stabbed me once with a kitchen knife.
Not really her fault as clinically insane (diagnosed 'Delusional Disorder' . . . although that looks more like a description of symptoms than a diagnosis to me!). Sectioned twice. I suspect that it's linked to falling off her Lambretta and fracturing her skull in pre helmet days.
How social workers thought she was a suitable person to adopt, I'll never know - but I suppose that it was pre birth control pill, when the problem they had was a surplus of healthy babies to 'dispose' off.
Don't really hate her, although it sometimes bubbles through . . . just before Christmas, she rang me twice whilst I was driving so I ignored the calls. Picked up my nine year old from his extra Maths / English group (grammar school entrance exam prep) and - very, very, unusually for him, I had a "can I have a word? moment from the tutor (prob my fault for feeding him too much sugar beforehand! (the child, not the tutor)).
Anyway, as we walked back to the car, I dealt with it very reasonably and calmly. Then my mother rang . . . "Why are you blocking my calls?" (she is utterly self centred, not selfish. Very needy, and has driven everyone else away over the years). That pushed my buttons and I just exploded, ending my rant by screaming "Just ps off and leave me alone, all of you!" into the phone. My little boy listened shocked and burst into tears on the pavement.
Horrible.
Not really her fault as clinically insane (diagnosed 'Delusional Disorder' . . . although that looks more like a description of symptoms than a diagnosis to me!). Sectioned twice. I suspect that it's linked to falling off her Lambretta and fracturing her skull in pre helmet days.
How social workers thought she was a suitable person to adopt, I'll never know - but I suppose that it was pre birth control pill, when the problem they had was a surplus of healthy babies to 'dispose' off.
Don't really hate her, although it sometimes bubbles through . . . just before Christmas, she rang me twice whilst I was driving so I ignored the calls. Picked up my nine year old from his extra Maths / English group (grammar school entrance exam prep) and - very, very, unusually for him, I had a "can I have a word? moment from the tutor (prob my fault for feeding him too much sugar beforehand! (the child, not the tutor)).
Anyway, as we walked back to the car, I dealt with it very reasonably and calmly. Then my mother rang . . . "Why are you blocking my calls?" (she is utterly self centred, not selfish. Very needy, and has driven everyone else away over the years). That pushed my buttons and I just exploded, ending my rant by screaming "Just p
s off and leave me alone, all of you!" into the phone. My little boy listened shocked and burst into tears on the pavement.Horrible.
Franks posts are pure class, I might not agree with all he says but I do have a chuckle. His post in the council thread regarding his cousin and the subsequent banter had me in stitches for about 10 minutes. I cant remember the last time I laughed so much, I always enjoy people who have amusing anecdotes.
All of my mothers side of the family, absolutely worst of society.
My Nan recently died and my mother being the only one who went to school and got anywhere was an executor of her will. This sent the other sisters into a mode of money grabbing bullying tactics and really hit home to my mum how little they care about her and just the money.
My cousin put an offer on my nans house 10 grand under the lowest estimate and accused my mum of being greedy by not accepting it. And recently sent my mum a text asking for money towards a skip to clear a few thing left at the house (she bought it after), because she should of cleaned it out, none of her family helped clearing anything out and this sent me over the top and I lost it with them, useless benefit scrounging scrouts.
All my mum has wanted is a decent family relationship because her father and mother were useless and her sisters are horrible, she feels that life has been unfair to her but I try telling her to cut them loose but she can’t seem to do it
My Nan recently died and my mother being the only one who went to school and got anywhere was an executor of her will. This sent the other sisters into a mode of money grabbing bullying tactics and really hit home to my mum how little they care about her and just the money.
My cousin put an offer on my nans house 10 grand under the lowest estimate and accused my mum of being greedy by not accepting it. And recently sent my mum a text asking for money towards a skip to clear a few thing left at the house (she bought it after), because she should of cleaned it out, none of her family helped clearing anything out and this sent me over the top and I lost it with them, useless benefit scrounging scrouts.
All my mum has wanted is a decent family relationship because her father and mother were useless and her sisters are horrible, she feels that life has been unfair to her but I try telling her to cut them loose but she can’t seem to do it
I think hate is a strong word, dislike or am irritated by is more accurate.
My mums sister has always been a sponger whether it's money from her mum or other people's time, when she doesn't give anyone the time of day. My nan is now in her 80s, yet often my aunt is 'too busy' to visit her. Happy to borrow money of her though as she has done over the years despite her partner earning significant salaries and yet they still end up in masses of debt. Just not an overly pleasant person.
The other person is my cousin although he's not a nasty or unpleasant guy, just naive and really irritating. He's recently gone vegetarian for environmental reasons, so he's also become an environmental Facebook preacher. I'm all for environmental awareness but the smugness and the hypocrisy is just cringeworthy. If he lived in a mud hut and ate berries, I'd give him some credit. Living in Clapham, driving a diesel, wearing leather and holidaying by plane as often as possible. Also moaning you can't afford a place to live, despite having earned good money for years but spending it every weekend on events you post all over social media. Just a but of a nob really! haha
My mums sister has always been a sponger whether it's money from her mum or other people's time, when she doesn't give anyone the time of day. My nan is now in her 80s, yet often my aunt is 'too busy' to visit her. Happy to borrow money of her though as she has done over the years despite her partner earning significant salaries and yet they still end up in masses of debt. Just not an overly pleasant person.
The other person is my cousin although he's not a nasty or unpleasant guy, just naive and really irritating. He's recently gone vegetarian for environmental reasons, so he's also become an environmental Facebook preacher. I'm all for environmental awareness but the smugness and the hypocrisy is just cringeworthy. If he lived in a mud hut and ate berries, I'd give him some credit. Living in Clapham, driving a diesel, wearing leather and holidaying by plane as often as possible. Also moaning you can't afford a place to live, despite having earned good money for years but spending it every weekend on events you post all over social media. Just a but of a nob really! haha
Frank7 said:
I don’t hate my wife’s brother, but we are diametrically opposed on a world of things.
e.g., I read a lot, usually broadsheet newspapers, and watch news channels, both U.K. and French.
He buys The Sun every day, but only reads the sport and racing pages.
Nothing wrong in that, that’s his prerogative, but if you said to him, “That’s very bad in Australia, isn’t it?”, he’d probably have no idea that there’s been bush fires raging there for months.
One of his daughters said that she was thinking of going to Paris for a couple of days with two friends, then renting a car and driving down to Provence, but told him that I’d said that due to the strikes and unrest right now, that might be worth putting on the back burner.
He said to her, “Strikes? What strikes?, Uncle Frank is winding you up as usual.”
He comes to our house, commandeers the TV remote, and we’re regaled with merde on a loop, re-runs of Fools and Horses, Pointless, (how apt), Tipping Point, football, snooker, darts, DARTS FFS!, cricket, horse racing, (which he’ll insist on recording, to watch again).
If I object, my wife flies to his defence, like a she bear whose cub has been threatened.
He moved to the boonies about six months ago, and my wife now informs me that his old local team is playing on Friday, so he’ll get a train up, and stay overnight.
I finally put my foot down, “Nicky, you know that I love you to bits, but this is our house, not mine, ours, and I am NOT, repeat NOT, going to let him dictate what we watch while he’s here.
If he wants to watch racing, let him walk over to a betting shop, and I’m not going to sit here seething while he watches interminable mind numbing crap.
He can watch The Andrew Neil Show, Politics Live, France 24, or Al Jazeera, with me, or he can go find a pub that’s showing darts or snooker, and I will NOT back down.”
Dominating the TV controls. Like. e.g., I read a lot, usually broadsheet newspapers, and watch news channels, both U.K. and French.
He buys The Sun every day, but only reads the sport and racing pages.
Nothing wrong in that, that’s his prerogative, but if you said to him, “That’s very bad in Australia, isn’t it?”, he’d probably have no idea that there’s been bush fires raging there for months.
One of his daughters said that she was thinking of going to Paris for a couple of days with two friends, then renting a car and driving down to Provence, but told him that I’d said that due to the strikes and unrest right now, that might be worth putting on the back burner.
He said to her, “Strikes? What strikes?, Uncle Frank is winding you up as usual.”
He comes to our house, commandeers the TV remote, and we’re regaled with merde on a loop, re-runs of Fools and Horses, Pointless, (how apt), Tipping Point, football, snooker, darts, DARTS FFS!, cricket, horse racing, (which he’ll insist on recording, to watch again).
If I object, my wife flies to his defence, like a she bear whose cub has been threatened.
He moved to the boonies about six months ago, and my wife now informs me that his old local team is playing on Friday, so he’ll get a train up, and stay overnight.
I finally put my foot down, “Nicky, you know that I love you to bits, but this is our house, not mine, ours, and I am NOT, repeat NOT, going to let him dictate what we watch while he’s here.
If he wants to watch racing, let him walk over to a betting shop, and I’m not going to sit here seething while he watches interminable mind numbing crap.
He can watch The Andrew Neil Show, Politics Live, France 24, or Al Jazeera, with me, or he can go find a pub that’s showing darts or snooker, and I will NOT back down.”
I hate my dad because he left when I was 5 and just restarted a new life, forgetting the two children he'd left behind. I hated my mum because a, she was a crap parent, and b, she was forever telling me I was useless, just like my father. Being taken into local authority care at the age of 14 was the best thing that happened to me. Yes I didn't have my parents, but then I didn't get the abuse either and that was a blessing.
No but there's not many to hate. No grandparents left, haven't seen father since I was 10, wouldn't recognise cousins and have spoken about 5 words to aunt and uncle in the last decade so it's just me, my brother and mother. They aren't currently speaking to each other but I get along pretty well with both.
I don't hate anyone in my family. I dislike a few people for various reasons but I'd still spend half an hour chatting to them at a family gathering rather than ignore them or get involved in any arguments.
My cousins cousin who I spent a bit of time with growing up is someone I had an issue with but it was long ago. The last time we were at a do, I said hello and made a few passing comments and he did the same. This is a lad who caused a big argument with me and an ex years ago. I didn't know why at the time but not long after we split up, he went out with her so it all became clear. Slimy thing to do but we've both moved on and have new partners, kids, etc. At my aunt and uncles anniversary do last year, we buried the hatchet. He had a nice Golf GTi and I had my M135i at the time so we had a chat about cars.
My other half doesn't speak to her Dad and in the 9 years I've known her, has refused point blank to let him be a part of her life or our sons. He's 4 now and they have never met. She never goes into any details but from what I can gather, they were close and he walked out and didn't bother with his kids. He had an affair and took on a new family while forgetting about his old one. He's tried to reach out since but I think the damage was already done. She also doesn't speak to her youngest sister but to be fair, she's a toxic person who looks down on her whole family just because she married into money and is caught up in the whole footballers wife lifestyle.
My cousins cousin who I spent a bit of time with growing up is someone I had an issue with but it was long ago. The last time we were at a do, I said hello and made a few passing comments and he did the same. This is a lad who caused a big argument with me and an ex years ago. I didn't know why at the time but not long after we split up, he went out with her so it all became clear. Slimy thing to do but we've both moved on and have new partners, kids, etc. At my aunt and uncles anniversary do last year, we buried the hatchet. He had a nice Golf GTi and I had my M135i at the time so we had a chat about cars.
My other half doesn't speak to her Dad and in the 9 years I've known her, has refused point blank to let him be a part of her life or our sons. He's 4 now and they have never met. She never goes into any details but from what I can gather, they were close and he walked out and didn't bother with his kids. He had an affair and took on a new family while forgetting about his old one. He's tried to reach out since but I think the damage was already done. She also doesn't speak to her youngest sister but to be fair, she's a toxic person who looks down on her whole family just because she married into money and is caught up in the whole footballers wife lifestyle.
Amused2death said:
I hate my dad because he left when I was 5 and just restarted a new life, forgetting the two children he'd left behind. I hated my mum because a, she was a crap parent, and b, she was forever telling me I was useless, just like my father. Being taken into local authority care at the age of 14 was the best thing that happened to me. Yes I didn't have my parents, but then I didn't get the abuse either and that was a blessing.
There's a 17 year old lad working with us who has had a similar experience. His father is nowhere to be seen and his mother is a toxic alcoholic who was abusive to him. He's been in care from 14 also. He lives in a house with a carer and has turned his life around. He has a good job in IT and doing well at it. He has a girlfriend and although he has grown up before his time, he's making a real go at his life rather than drifting into a downward spiral which I imagine would be easy to do after a hard upbringing like that. I was thinking about this over Christmas, after an odd conversation with a mate of mine a couple of weeks ago, and I really count myself lucky that no, I don't hate anyone in my family, and as far as I can tell, we don't have the "weird uncle" that turns up at family gatherings and ruins everything. Both my parents are one of 4, I am one of four, and my wife's mum was one of 4 (my wife only one of three) but with all the extended family, no issues at all.
I don't speak regularly to a few of my cousins, but that's just a factor of geography and age difference - there's 20+ year age span in my cousins and I'm about the middle one, but there's never been any concern at weddings/funerals/christenings etc when we do get together.
Maybe that makes me the weird one, as the saying goes.
I don't speak regularly to a few of my cousins, but that's just a factor of geography and age difference - there's 20+ year age span in my cousins and I'm about the middle one, but there's never been any concern at weddings/funerals/christenings etc when we do get together.
Maybe that makes me the weird one, as the saying goes.
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