Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 9)
Discussion
glenrobbo said:
All in all, if you count the fall from 3,000+ feet, that's four quite horrific ways to go. 
BUT...if you have sympathy with every person in the world who dies horribly, or suffers something terrible, or who is just less fortunate than you, then very very quickly even Mother Theresa's store of empathy would be exhausted.
...and that's before you think about the environment and our total inability to even start to fix that issue as the world is run by big corporates (who don't care about anything beyond this year's profit) and by China & Russia (who don't even care that far).
...and then you get to the future...what your children will face, and worst of all, whether your wife will have one on her when you get home...
The world is a s
t place. Unbelievably so, and in near-limitless ways. If you take it seriously all the time you'll drive yourself into depression. Gallows humour is a coping mechanism for many.havoc said:
glenrobbo said:
All in all, if you count the fall from 3,000+ feet, that's four quite horrific ways to go.
BUT...if you have sympathy with every person in the world who dies horribly, or suffers something terrible, or who is just less fortunate than you, then very very quickly even Mother Theresa's store of empathy would be exhausted.
...and that's before you think about the environment and our total inability to even start to fix that issue as the world is run by big corporates (who don't care about anything beyond this year's profit) and by China & Russia (who don't even care that far).
...and then you get to the future...what your children will face, and worst of all, whether your wife will have one on her when you get home...
The world is a s
t place. Unbelievably so, and in near-limitless ways. If you take it seriously all the time you'll drive yourself into depression. Gallows humour is a coping mechanism for many.You have really brightened up my day.
Oh well, back to the gallows then...
glenrobbo said:
So they were just stringing him along?
What happened to Black Bess? ( Are we allowed to call her that? )
Why did they need two carts?
Why did they need three people atop the frame, with just a dodgy ladder at a crazy angle? What if one of them were to fall? Somebody below could be injured. To be safe, they should have erected a scaffold. Who carried out the risk assessment? Where was the Health and Safety inspector? There is so much wrong in that picture.
Black Bess probably ended up as Filly Mignon. What happened to Black Bess? ( Are we allowed to call her that? )
Why did they need two carts?
Why did they need three people atop the frame, with just a dodgy ladder at a crazy angle? What if one of them were to fall? Somebody below could be injured. To be safe, they should have erected a scaffold. Who carried out the risk assessment? Where was the Health and Safety inspector? There is so much wrong in that picture.
Two tumbrils? Busy day I expect.
DT was hanged at York but this pic is of the original post-tree Tyburn.
This was pre long-drop hanging so each miscreant would ascend the ladder, get noosed up and be invited to hop off.
Shaking/twisting the ladder encouraged the reluctant.
No broken vertebrae = slow strangulation. Turpin was allowed to dangle for 15 mins. I expect the guys up top did the cutting down.
Can you imagine doing that climb for each and every crim?
I heard a WW1 era radio play as a child, and that featured an execution by hanging from a German Zeppelin. The rope was very long and the victim was noosed and thrown over the side of the gondola over the sea. According to this play the condemned man didn't even slow down - his head and body separated instantly and continued on their own merry journeys to the sea. That thought has stuck with me, unsurprisingly. Don't give a primary school boy a crystal radio!
Trophy Husband said:
Erm, not the professionally offended, just decent human beings. I'm sure the poor chap has a mother and father, brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles etc.
Dry your eyes Princess.I had the pleasure of seeing to the medical needs of a South Asian asylum seeker yesterday.
He had nothing.
No home, no money, no food.
Literally the clothes he stood up in.
“What’s your date of birth?
1989, in the summer.
Where were you born?
Can’t remember.
D’you have any family?
I did. Don’t know where they are now.....dead probably”
So, tragic though it is, if you think these people tie a spotted hanky to a stick, hoist it over their shoulder and head over the horizon like a modern day Dick Whittington, with a family left behind waiting for news, you’re completely wrong.
Edited by anonymous-user on Friday 5th July 16:54
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