Really like cars but not enjoying learning to drive
Discussion
Hi All
I've lurked on here for a while but have only just decided to create an account. I'm 17 and have always had a strong interest in cars from a young age, but I'm currently learning to drive (had almost 30 lessons) and to be honest I'm just not getting on with it. My problems seem to revolve mainly around general coordination when manoeuvring, and I'm struggling to improve (I have mild dyspraxia which I guess doesn't help). It also kind of grates that I have friends who have passed in far fewer lessons but don't know anything about cars. I'm finding that I no longer have a desire to drive nice cars - look at them and be driven in them, yes, but not to actually drive myself.
I suppose there's no real purpose to this post apart from the fact that I'm feeling a bit disillusioned and would welcome any advice/opinions.
Thanks.
I've lurked on here for a while but have only just decided to create an account. I'm 17 and have always had a strong interest in cars from a young age, but I'm currently learning to drive (had almost 30 lessons) and to be honest I'm just not getting on with it. My problems seem to revolve mainly around general coordination when manoeuvring, and I'm struggling to improve (I have mild dyspraxia which I guess doesn't help). It also kind of grates that I have friends who have passed in far fewer lessons but don't know anything about cars. I'm finding that I no longer have a desire to drive nice cars - look at them and be driven in them, yes, but not to actually drive myself.
I suppose there's no real purpose to this post apart from the fact that I'm feeling a bit disillusioned and would welcome any advice/opinions.
Thanks.
Edited by Car Fan on Sunday 17th August 23:44
williamp said:
Nothing wrong in piking cars but not driving. I dont particularly enjoy the latter these days. There doesn't seem to be a lot to enjoy.
But I do still love cars. The shape, the noise, the smell, the technology. There isnt much about a car I don't like
Yep, I guess. Maybe it will get better as I progress and once I hopefully have my licence. I think I just need to not rush and accept that I will not be a brilliant driver (but hopefully competent) and that learning to drive will take as long as it takes, even if I am learning for longer than most.But I do still love cars. The shape, the noise, the smell, the technology. There isnt much about a car I don't like
Sorry to hear about your struggles. I can imagine it being very frustrating. Try not to lose heart.
What kind of feedback has your instructor given you?
Is there possibility of practising in the family car to work on your manoeuvres? Empty car park/repetition might help.
One other option might be trying an automatic, however as a car enthusiast, that would quite notably reduce your choices when it comes to buy a car.
Best of luck.
What kind of feedback has your instructor given you?
Is there possibility of practising in the family car to work on your manoeuvres? Empty car park/repetition might help.
One other option might be trying an automatic, however as a car enthusiast, that would quite notably reduce your choices when it comes to buy a car.
Best of luck.
g3org3y said:
Sorry to hear about your struggles. I can imagine it being very frustrating. Try not to lose heart.
What kind of feedback has your instructor given you?
Is there possibility of practising in the family car to work on your manoeuvres? Empty car park/repetition might help.
One other option might be trying an automatic, however as a car enthusiast, that would quite notably reduce your choices when it comes to buy a car.
Best of luck.
My instructor did tell my dad that I was one of the most 'difficult' learners he'd had for a while with regards to basic coordinationWhat kind of feedback has your instructor given you?
Is there possibility of practising in the family car to work on your manoeuvres? Empty car park/repetition might help.
One other option might be trying an automatic, however as a car enthusiast, that would quite notably reduce your choices when it comes to buy a car.
Best of luck.
Hopefully I will get some practice with my mum in her car in the next few days, just got to get insurance sorted out.
I'm not sure if learning in an auto would help and wouldn't like the fact that it would restrict my car choices in the future, but I'll bear it in mind as a last resort.
Thank you
Car Fan said:
Hi All
I've lurked on here for a while but have only just decided to create an account. I'm 17 and have always had a strong interest in cars from a young age, but I'm currently learning to drive (had almost 30 lessons) and to be honest I'm just not getting on with it. My problems seem to revolve mainly around general coordination when manoeuvring, and I'm struggling to improve (I have mild dyspraxia which I guess doesn't help). It also kind of grates that I have friends who have passed in far fewer lessons but don't know anything about cars. I'm finding that I no longer have a desire to drive nice cars - look at them and be driven in them, yes, but not to actually drive myself.
I suppose there's no real purpose to this post apart from the fact that I'm feeling a bit disillusioned and would welcome any advice/opinions.
Thanks.
Relax. It takes an average of 20 to 50 lessons to pass the UK driving test. At ~30 lessons, you are still well within the "normal" zone for driving lessons. Keep at it and it will eventually "click" I've lurked on here for a while but have only just decided to create an account. I'm 17 and have always had a strong interest in cars from a young age, but I'm currently learning to drive (had almost 30 lessons) and to be honest I'm just not getting on with it. My problems seem to revolve mainly around general coordination when manoeuvring, and I'm struggling to improve (I have mild dyspraxia which I guess doesn't help). It also kind of grates that I have friends who have passed in far fewer lessons but don't know anything about cars. I'm finding that I no longer have a desire to drive nice cars - look at them and be driven in them, yes, but not to actually drive myself.
I suppose there's no real purpose to this post apart from the fact that I'm feeling a bit disillusioned and would welcome any advice/opinions.
Thanks.
Edited by Car Fan on Sunday 17th August 23:44
I think I took about fifteen lessons over a 6 week period, sitting my test another 6 weeks after that. But, I also did about 3000 miles in those 12 weeks with parents, and I also had the advantage of having bombed old cars around fields when friends relented so it wasn't 'just' fifteen hours of tuition. Just try getting out with your parents, set up some cones in the corner of a carpark or industrial estate and get playing around on a sunday morning when it's quiet. It'll come, it might just take a little longer than you'd like!
I tried to look up famous dyspraxic racing drivers. Sadly there are no public mentions. However...
Daniel Radcliffe is... sorry once again this probably isn't that inspiring.
Robin Williams was... ok so this would have probably been more encouraging a couple of weeks ago.
Richard Branson is... see not all bad.
On a more serious note, just keep at it, it may take a bit longer than others but it will click.
Automatics might be a good bet. I wouldn't worry about limiting purchases, more and more cars are autos lately and they are better 95% of the time anyway.
Daniel Radcliffe is... sorry once again this probably isn't that inspiring.
Robin Williams was... ok so this would have probably been more encouraging a couple of weeks ago.
Richard Branson is... see not all bad.
On a more serious note, just keep at it, it may take a bit longer than others but it will click.
Automatics might be a good bet. I wouldn't worry about limiting purchases, more and more cars are autos lately and they are better 95% of the time anyway.
I went through this when I was learning. I previously loved cars and found myself loathing them during my lessons. After I passed and started driving on my own the appreciation came back.
Driving lessons aren't much fun, but we all had to go through it. Stick at it, you'll get there eventually.
Driving lessons aren't much fun, but we all had to go through it. Stick at it, you'll get there eventually.
Don't give up, and don't resign yourself to only ever being a 'competent' driver; it is often said that you don't start learning to drive until you pass your test, and you'll probably find that once you're over this hurdle and able to drive solo that you'll be able to relax- the pressure will be off.
There is always my aunt's way of passing a test - take it 6 times, scare the examiner so much he passes her rather than face the inevitable 7th test. Worked 3 decades ago...
Really, you never do learn everything about driving - the moment you think you have is the moment you should stop.
All a test pass means is that you managed to convince someone you aren't a total liability - for most people, a 17 year old person who has only had lessons before a test is fairly likely to have never:
driven in the rain
driven at night
driven on snow
driven on a dual carriage way
even driven on a NSL road
Despite that, most will think "I've passed my test, I can drive, I don't need to learn any more."
Key thing is, you want to improve - that's worth far more than any other factor at this point in time.
Really, you never do learn everything about driving - the moment you think you have is the moment you should stop.
All a test pass means is that you managed to convince someone you aren't a total liability - for most people, a 17 year old person who has only had lessons before a test is fairly likely to have never:
driven in the rain
driven at night
driven on snow
driven on a dual carriage way
even driven on a NSL road
Despite that, most will think "I've passed my test, I can drive, I don't need to learn any more."
Key thing is, you want to improve - that's worth far more than any other factor at this point in time.
Car Fan said:
northwest monkey said:
Maybe change instructor?
Yes, I thought about this and have booked an assessment with another instructor to see if I get along better with somebody else.Thanks for the words of encouragement!
Was world apart. Would tell me where to go and after literally every turn or movement i'd get a 'well done' or 'that was good'. Made such a difference to my confidence and I ended up passing at nearly 18 first time with 3 minors.
keep plugging away.
The coordination will come. It's difficult for a lot of people but is just about practice. Once it clicks, you'll never have to worry about it again.
As for never being a good driver, that's rubbish. A tiny tiny part of being a good road driver might be about coordination, but all of the rest is about attitude, judgment and anticipation. From the sound of your post and the fact that you have sought advice, you'll be able to develop all of those.
As for never being a good driver, that's rubbish. A tiny tiny part of being a good road driver might be about coordination, but all of the rest is about attitude, judgment and anticipation. From the sound of your post and the fact that you have sought advice, you'll be able to develop all of those.
If you're feeling like this after 30 lessons, then something needs to change.
After 30 lessons, your instructor should at least be discussing potential test dates (even if it may still be a few months away).
Dyspraxia is a difficult condition to manage for an instructor who does not have any experience with the symptoms. I don't know how serious your dyspraxia is (although I note that you state it is mild), but unless they have a clear understanding of the condition, your instructor may be having difficulty in understanding why you're not "picking up" things as quickly as their other students.
Lets be clear though - dyspraxia is not a barrier to driving - it just makes the learning process more difficult.
I have three suggestions for you which may help. Feel free to try any or all of them (or to ignore them all and persist with your current course of instruction).
Firstly, change your instructor. Look for an instructor who specialises in disabled students. I realise that you may not be disabled in the traditional sense, but your condition does make learning to drive more difficult and it is important that your instructor should have some experience with the condition. The DVLSA keep a list of driving instructors on their website searchable by postcode here: https://www.gov.uk/find-driving-schools-and-lesson...
Ring up a few instructors and discuss your condition. If they start asking you about the condition then they're the wrong instructor for you. You need an instructor who understands the condition and preferably one who has some experience instructing dyspraxic students.
Secondly, you should seriously consider, as others have suggested, switching to an automatic. If you take away the distractions of clutch control and gears, driving becomes a more straightforward process and driving an auto means you have less seperate actions which you need to co-ordinate at the same time.
It doesn't mean that you can never drive a manual - just consider it a two stage test. Pass in an auto, have a year or so of solo driving to gain some experience and then go back to a manual and take your test again. Once you've got some driving experience, you'll only have to re-learn clutch and gears in order to pass your manual test.
You're not really limiting your car choice much these days either. Any two-pedal car, including automated manual gearboxes such as DSG gearbox cars only require an automatic licence, so there are plenty of more interesting cars to choose from.
The third tip - and I appreciate that this very much depends on your budget - is to get your own car to practice in. If you're only having lessons with an instructor, your practice time is very limited, and with dyspraxia it is practice, practice, practice which you need. It takes you longer to learn to co-ordinate the actions required to drive a car, and so you need to practice whenever you can.
If you have your own car - something cheap - you can rope in a suitably qualified parent or relative to sit next to you whilst you practice what your instructor has taught you. Insurance is usually cheaper for a provisional licence holder than for a newly-qualified driver, so it may be within your budget.
Feel free to PM me if you continue to struggle. I'm an ex police instructor and ADI and a lifelong car nut, so I understand both your enthusiasm and your frustrations. Don't be put off by your experiences to date. Keep working at it & in time you'll get there.
After 30 lessons, your instructor should at least be discussing potential test dates (even if it may still be a few months away).
Dyspraxia is a difficult condition to manage for an instructor who does not have any experience with the symptoms. I don't know how serious your dyspraxia is (although I note that you state it is mild), but unless they have a clear understanding of the condition, your instructor may be having difficulty in understanding why you're not "picking up" things as quickly as their other students.
Lets be clear though - dyspraxia is not a barrier to driving - it just makes the learning process more difficult.
I have three suggestions for you which may help. Feel free to try any or all of them (or to ignore them all and persist with your current course of instruction).
Firstly, change your instructor. Look for an instructor who specialises in disabled students. I realise that you may not be disabled in the traditional sense, but your condition does make learning to drive more difficult and it is important that your instructor should have some experience with the condition. The DVLSA keep a list of driving instructors on their website searchable by postcode here: https://www.gov.uk/find-driving-schools-and-lesson...
Ring up a few instructors and discuss your condition. If they start asking you about the condition then they're the wrong instructor for you. You need an instructor who understands the condition and preferably one who has some experience instructing dyspraxic students.
Secondly, you should seriously consider, as others have suggested, switching to an automatic. If you take away the distractions of clutch control and gears, driving becomes a more straightforward process and driving an auto means you have less seperate actions which you need to co-ordinate at the same time.
It doesn't mean that you can never drive a manual - just consider it a two stage test. Pass in an auto, have a year or so of solo driving to gain some experience and then go back to a manual and take your test again. Once you've got some driving experience, you'll only have to re-learn clutch and gears in order to pass your manual test.
You're not really limiting your car choice much these days either. Any two-pedal car, including automated manual gearboxes such as DSG gearbox cars only require an automatic licence, so there are plenty of more interesting cars to choose from.
The third tip - and I appreciate that this very much depends on your budget - is to get your own car to practice in. If you're only having lessons with an instructor, your practice time is very limited, and with dyspraxia it is practice, practice, practice which you need. It takes you longer to learn to co-ordinate the actions required to drive a car, and so you need to practice whenever you can.
If you have your own car - something cheap - you can rope in a suitably qualified parent or relative to sit next to you whilst you practice what your instructor has taught you. Insurance is usually cheaper for a provisional licence holder than for a newly-qualified driver, so it may be within your budget.
Feel free to PM me if you continue to struggle. I'm an ex police instructor and ADI and a lifelong car nut, so I understand both your enthusiasm and your frustrations. Don't be put off by your experiences to date. Keep working at it & in time you'll get there.
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