Daft car comments

[Nicol@]

Pouring down with rain this morning.

A guy at work said to me 'I bet you have trouble with grip at the back in your car in this weather don't you'

I told him the scooby is 4wd and I kept a straight face.

Anyone else had silly conversations about their cars?

[shadowninja]

"What's the fuel economy like?"

As if I bother to work it out. If I did, I'd sell the bugger!!

[MrFlibbles]

A chav where I used to work, telling me that FWD cars are quicker off the line as they get the power down better during acceleration....

[denisb]

"You'd be better off with a Ford, they're faster"

Orange clad marshall at Brands Hatch after I had beaten everybody in my class by a second a lap in qualifying.

"I'd personally rather have a Ford engine"

An apparently highly respected 'technical' motor journalist, engine tuner, rolling road operator etc after my worn out badly tuned and built 4A-GE outperformed any Ford engine by over 10BHP on a rolling road day.

[Pulsatingstar]

I could do loads by my nemesis at work.

"So what engine size is it 3 litre or something"
"1.3"
"whats that a spitfire engine"
"no"


I got a coolant leak...

"have you fixed the leak"
"no, think its the rad though"
"cant you get an escort rad from a breakers"
"no it needs to be an rx7 rad"
"but it might be the same rad as an escort"
"it isnt"
"it might use the same as something else tough"
"it wont, its an RX7 rad"
"you mean its got its own rad?"
"yes, its a proper car..."

me - "its an import from Japan, as there arnt many here"
"you mean its a japanese car"
"no its actually from japan"
"but it cant be its here"
"yeah it got imported over"
"all the way from japan"
"yeah"

He never did work that one out...

Die. Twat.

[shadowninja]

Gazboy said:

"You should be locked up, and banned for life" That last comment was in response to a co-worker witnessing me cruising at 95mph on a four lane motorway at 4.30am. The same guy will openly admit to drinking 8 pints then driving home.

yer but spd kils innit.

MrFlibbles said:

A chav where I used to work, telling me that FWD cars are quicker off the line as they get the power down better during acceleration....

Reminds me of that arguement about Saxos being able to waste F355s in drag races... because they have a shorter wheelbase.

[tuttle]

In regard to 4wd cars.

'so what do the other wheels do then?'

>> Edited by tuttle on Wednesday 15th June 22:03

[wacky racer]

Went to view a six year old Morgan+8 in London in the late seventies, after seeing an ad in the Sunday Times....

After travelling 180 miles down from Manchester, I was dismayed to find the car was riddled with corrosion on the front wings.......

I said to the vendor..."What's this then?"....

He replied, "Oh! that's what's known in the trade as artifical surface rust"...........

Didn't know whether to laugh or cry,,,,

Ended up buying a mint one from Gerrards Cross later that week, so wasn't entirely a wasted journey....

[MrFlibbles]

Pulsatingstar said:

I got a coolant leak... "have you fixed the leak" "no, think its the rad though" "cant you get an escort rad from a breakers" "no it needs to be an rx7 rad" "but it might be the same rad as an escort" "it isnt" "it might use the same as something else tough" "it wont, its an RX7 rad" "you mean its got its own rad?" "yes, its a proper car..." me - "its an import from Japan, as there arnt many here" "you mean its a japanese car" "no its actually from japan" "but it cant be its here" "yeah it got imported over" "all the way from japan" "yeah" He never did work that one out... Die. Twat.

[Nicol@]

When I had an MR2 and would plan going out with mates, the amount of times I heard 'it's your turn to drive'.

I never worked out how to put 3 people on 1 seat.

[Sponge Bob]

Nicol@ said:

When I had an MR2 and would plan going out with mates, the amount of times I heard 'it's your turn to drive'. I never worked out how to put 3 people on 1 seat.

I've had 2 in the passenger seat of my Mk1

but only on private roads.... naturally

[Andymx5]

None for the mx5 accept the usual Hairdresser comments.

I had a classic back in 2000 when I had a Smart city-coupe whilst they were still very rare over here. Filling up at a petrol station with unleaded, a guy walks up to me and says "Oh this is one of those new electric cars, isn't it?"

[rustybin]

"It can't be that quick it's an estate."

"Turbo's are just a bit of a gimmick though aren't they?"

"Same tranmission as the Range Rover isn't it?"

"Petrol's Petrol don't know why you're worried"

[Sponge Bob]

Gazboy said:

When I had the MRT, a passenger in a white Sierra Cosworth said "It's a faggot's car, slow girls car..." Lights go green, Cossie launches off the line like a banshee, I launch like I've been slung from a catapault (dropped the clutch at 5k, no wheelspin), and eat the cossie up the d/c. At the roundabout, I wait and ask the passenger to repeat that. He mumbles 'kin ell! The driver gives it large and buggers off. Carbon copy with a TVR Chimaera 4.0, except the driver called me a and stuck a finger up.

Sweet sweet sweet

Roll on 25... or a well paid job to cover insurance mugging.

[Fidgits]

'Its just a re-badged Toyota..'

erm, actually.... ..never mind...

[Twincam16]

shadowninja said:

MrFlibbles said: A chav where I used to work, telling me that FWD cars are quicker off the line as they get the power down better during acceleration.... Reminds me of that arguement about Saxos being able to waste F355s in drag races... because they have a shorter wheelbase.

Yep, I've heard those, plus:

"Rotary engines must be really economical, because they're only 1.3s"

"30 mpg is thirsty"

"The Citroen AX GT was the first car designed with the aid of a wind tunnel"

"The shorter you make the gear lever, the faster the gear changes"

"The Mazda RX7 from The Fast And The Furious is actually the fastest car in the world"

"Lotus make notoriously bad-handling cars because they're all RWD"

And I had a protracted conversation with a guy determined to convince me that the Peugoet 205 GTi 1.6 was in fact faster and better in every respect than a Lotus Turbo Esprit. He said that the short wheelbase and FWD meant the Peugoet was the fastest off the line (huh?), it handles better 'because it's FWD' (huh?), and 'that styling on the Esprit slows it down cos it's got no bodykit' (huh?)

TBH, I get that sort of thing every time I talk cars with people who don't know their stuff. For some reason, though, they think they do.

[GravelBen]

from mates flatmate the other day:

"I have to be real careful in the wet because of all the power (he has an 80's 2.0 automatic supra/barge)"

and then:

"and also because i only have directional tires, cos they have less grip..."

and this fool also thinks he's going to buy a Carerra GT

[neil.b]

I posted this a while back, when I had the TVR;

A contractor who has been working at the office collared me on my way out to lunch today.

"I see you've got a TVR now eh?", grinning.
"Yes, thanks"
"You know Jeremy Clarkson has one of those..."
"Does he?"
"Yes, and you know what he does...."
"No, go on, tell me...."
"He has it serviced AT THE FACTORY...."
"Well, so do many people, where better place to get it done?"
"Yes, but you know what TVR do...."
"Erm, no, go on..."
"Well, you know because Clarkson sometime writes really bad reviews of cars he doesn't like...."
"....well, yes...."
"Well, so that his TVR doesn't brake down in case he writes anything bad about them....."
[i wait with baited breath]
"....they put a new engine in it every time it goes in for a service....", chuckle, chuckle....

"....do they reaaalllly? Must rush, nice talking to you..."




>> Edited by neil.b on Tuesday 21st June 10:26

[Twincam16]

I seem to remember someone mentioning a conversation between two chavs over a TVR, where they said 'Speed six - they have a six-speed gearbox. It's not as good as a Speed twelve though, they've got a twelve-speed gearbox...'

And there was someone a PHer mentioned who was bluffing that one of their relatives had a McLaren F1.

"LHD or RHD?"

"Oh, RHD of course"

[JonRB]

I had an old Skoda Estelle as a student. I used to lift the front bonnet and say "oh my God! Someone's stolen my engine! Never mind, there's a spare one in the boot".

Oh how funny I thought that was. Now I cringe at the thought.