HMRC have no sense of humour
Discussion
It is funny and his retort was a little bit of cream.
HMRC demanded nearly £10k from me around his time last year, 2/3rds to be paid before 31 Jan. A frantic phone call to HMRC and a chat with a helpful chap (eventually) elicited the response that he could see where the 'error' might be but that I still had to pay the money by the deadline but that if he was correct about the error I would get it refunded. I paid the money, got told that I was entitled to have it back but 63 days later. They even refused to speak with me until they'd repaid the money.
You can see how these loan sharks get their customers. If I hadn't any savings I could access immediately it would have had to come out of credit cards or loans.
For 2011-12 I decided to go with an accountant. On Monday I got the new figure: £701. That's for the whole year. It would appear that if you have less than a certain amount to pay they don't split it up into two payments.
Despite the fabulous news I went to see my accountant. She went though the coarse details. It seems I'd overpaid the previous year and by a considerable degree.
That's less than £60 pcm. So you can see how much and why I enjoyed the OP's joke.
HMRC demanded nearly £10k from me around his time last year, 2/3rds to be paid before 31 Jan. A frantic phone call to HMRC and a chat with a helpful chap (eventually) elicited the response that he could see where the 'error' might be but that I still had to pay the money by the deadline but that if he was correct about the error I would get it refunded. I paid the money, got told that I was entitled to have it back but 63 days later. They even refused to speak with me until they'd repaid the money.
You can see how these loan sharks get their customers. If I hadn't any savings I could access immediately it would have had to come out of credit cards or loans.
For 2011-12 I decided to go with an accountant. On Monday I got the new figure: £701. That's for the whole year. It would appear that if you have less than a certain amount to pay they don't split it up into two payments.
Despite the fabulous news I went to see my accountant. She went though the coarse details. It seems I'd overpaid the previous year and by a considerable degree.
That's less than £60 pcm. So you can see how much and why I enjoyed the OP's joke.
Eric Mc said:
Poking HMRC with a pointy stick is very much the Steve Irwin approach to dealing with the tax authorities.
100% this. I dislike the way that the HMRC operate as much as the next honest tax payer and often think of things I would like to say and do to make their life as hard as possible, yet never do anything except be Mr Helpful and co-operative himself.
The less trouble I give them the less they are likely to try to look deeper and therefore the less time they will waste of theirs and mine trying to find something that isn't there.
Life is hard without giving HMRC any excuse to make it harder.
There is as they say, no pillow as soft as a clear conscience.
When they were here, I decided to keep it formal but polite. I could not see the benefit in antagonising someone who when all's said & done is doing their job. As irritating as it was to be picked out, I have nothing to hide, so I got on with it and got them on their way as quickly as possible & got back to business.
When they were here, I decided to keep it formal but polite. I could not see the benefit in antagonising someone who when all's said & done is doing their job. As irritating as it was to be picked out, I have nothing to hide, so I got on with it and got them on their way as quickly as possible & got back to business.
Rude-boy said:
The less trouble I give them the less they are likely to try to look deeper and therefore the less time they will waste of theirs and mine trying to find something that isn't there.
I was in the City police at a time when it was very corrupt. 30% were on the take I reckon. Those of us who were 'clean' and caused 'ripples' could be targeted and the easiest method was via accounts, claims for expenses being easily used as they were signed etc.I used to claim for a little less than I was entitled to, this being a lifeline at one time which saved me a lot of trouble.
Over the years I've done the same with HMRC but in talking with my accountant she said to go for everything. As long as it is proveable you are in the clear.
Fingers crossed.
Two months ago I got a cheque from HMRC saying they were going to pay me ~£800. One month ago, with no change in circumstances in between, I got a letter demanding £800 with the usual menaces.
I just pay/let them pay me and pass it over to the accountant when I see him at the end of the year. They're a total farce.
I just pay/let them pay me and pass it over to the accountant when I see him at the end of the year. They're a total farce.
Re Tax inspections.
Many, many, years ago my father was notified he would be receiving a VAT inspection the following day. Much wailing and gnashing of teeth occurred, not though any real fear, but no one likes being investigated, no matter how squeaky they are.
Half way through the second day of the C&E team's visit (3 of them for a small business!) all seemed to be going very well. Right up until Dad patted the short, grey, wiry little chap who appeared in charge on the head and announced to the other inspectors "You can see why he's the boss, he’s just like a little terrier isn't he?"
The inspection lasted another week nearly and you could feel the pain in the lead chap's heart as he left knowing that there was nothing out of place, other than a few £k they owed Dad
Many, many, years ago my father was notified he would be receiving a VAT inspection the following day. Much wailing and gnashing of teeth occurred, not though any real fear, but no one likes being investigated, no matter how squeaky they are.
Half way through the second day of the C&E team's visit (3 of them for a small business!) all seemed to be going very well. Right up until Dad patted the short, grey, wiry little chap who appeared in charge on the head and announced to the other inspectors "You can see why he's the boss, he’s just like a little terrier isn't he?"
The inspection lasted another week nearly and you could feel the pain in the lead chap's heart as he left knowing that there was nothing out of place, other than a few £k they owed Dad
Rude-boy said:
Re Tax inspections.
Many, many, years ago my father was notified he would be receiving a VAT inspection the following day. Much wailing and gnashing of teeth occurred, not though any real fear, but no one likes being investigated, no matter how squeaky they are.
Half way through the second day of the C&E team's visit (3 of them for a small business!) all seemed to be going very well. Right up until Dad patted the short, grey, wiry little chap who appeared in charge on the head and announced to the other inspectors "You can see why he's the boss, he’s just like a little terrier isn't he?"
The inspection lasted another week nearly and you could feel the pain in the lead chap's heart as he left knowing that there was nothing out of place, other than a few £k they owed Dad
These fMany, many, years ago my father was notified he would be receiving a VAT inspection the following day. Much wailing and gnashing of teeth occurred, not though any real fear, but no one likes being investigated, no matter how squeaky they are.
Half way through the second day of the C&E team's visit (3 of them for a small business!) all seemed to be going very well. Right up until Dad patted the short, grey, wiry little chap who appeared in charge on the head and announced to the other inspectors "You can see why he's the boss, he’s just like a little terrier isn't he?"
The inspection lasted another week nearly and you could feel the pain in the lead chap's heart as he left knowing that there was nothing out of place, other than a few £k they owed Dad
king nazis. Always picking on the small private busineses. These HMRC are are different breed, of course they have no humour stty bds.0000 said:
Two months ago I got a cheque from HMRC saying they were going to pay me ~£800. One month ago, with no change in circumstances in between, I got a letter demanding £800 with the usual menaces.
I just pay/let them pay me and pass it over to the accountant when I see him at the end of the year. They're a total farce.
Careful of this.I just pay/let them pay me and pass it over to the accountant when I see him at the end of the year. They're a total farce.
I got a rebate of around the same amount. I checked with the HMRC and asked why. No answer was forthcoming. I spent the money.
Three months later I was told I owed them exactly twice the amount of money. I made a few calls to HMRC without result. The following year, after the demand for £10k as above, I was told that I was owed £550 I think. After a few phone calls, post finding out that I did not owe £10k, I was told that not only was there no £550 hiding away but that I owed them.
Fast forward to this year and it appears I was owed a considerable sum according to my accountants.
I got the dreaded letter of notification a few years ago. Signed by Mr 'Bob'.
Unusually for me, I picked the phone up that day and asked when he would like to pop by.... completely threw him.
Lots of 'umming' and 'arring' and he apologised but was a bit busy currently and it would have to wait until after his holidays. We pencilled in some time and unfortunately it clashed with my hols - I didn't realise at the time (ahem) so we arranged for teh inspection and grilling at my Accountant's office where all the papers were anyway (they ran my PAYE at the time anyway).
A whole day grilling and God knows how long behind the scenes later and after much questioning and correspondence I got the dreaded fine!!!
I hadn't realised that my Mobile was in my personal name but paid out of teh COmpany Bank a/c and I hadn't declared it as a P11D etc.
Utter waste of time!
Still don't want to go through it again though
Unusually for me, I picked the phone up that day and asked when he would like to pop by.... completely threw him.
Lots of 'umming' and 'arring' and he apologised but was a bit busy currently and it would have to wait until after his holidays. We pencilled in some time and unfortunately it clashed with my hols - I didn't realise at the time (ahem) so we arranged for teh inspection and grilling at my Accountant's office where all the papers were anyway (they ran my PAYE at the time anyway).
A whole day grilling and God knows how long behind the scenes later and after much questioning and correspondence I got the dreaded fine!!!
I hadn't realised that my Mobile was in my personal name but paid out of teh COmpany Bank a/c and I hadn't declared it as a P11D etc.
Utter waste of time!
Still don't want to go through it again though
rb5er said:
Great article.
You do realise it's a joke, don't you? An urban myth, circulated in emails from middle-aged men to other middle-aged men since the internet was born, along with the letter apparently sent to the bank by a wag claiming that henceforth he'll begin charging them for phone calls and letters etc... Or have you not seen that one yet? (Apologies if I've spoiled the punchline for you, but trust me: it's hilarious.)Gassing Station | News, Politics & Economics | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff